Running from the Past
by christmaslights44
Summary: Tara and her best friend from college movie back to Charming and SAMCRO. The best friend brings with her a past of her own. This is a Chibs/OC story, with Jax/Tara and Gemma/Clay. Rating changed to M.
1. Prologue

She hadn't meant to choose a town with an adjective for a name. _Charming._ It'd better be cute as hell to live up to that name. But it had what she needed - a job, protection, a friend, and some calm. For a change. Mackenzie Torrell laughed to herself as she drove past the Charming town sign. Home, sweet home.

It'd been strange fate that had brought her here. If she was honest, the story started with her uncle. Her parents had been troubled, to say the least. Drugs, alcohol, petty crime, it hadn't really mattered. In their rare lucid moments they'd instilled in Mac a love of literature, and a penchant for cars and bikes. Her uncle, on the other hand, had been more of a heavy handed guardian.

He was a Navy big shot, and he never let Mac forget it. She'd followed her books to a languages major in college, and then her uncle to the military. For whatever reason, she was good at it. Good at something that she abhorred and reveled in in equal parts. She saw the former part squashed smaller and smaller as the military became a source of livelihood.

When she'd finished her training, they'd sent her overseas. She was not your average solider - _special agent_ \- they'd called her. She always cringed at the TV-trope title. But overseas she went; to Britain, Egypt, Russia, Greece, anywhere they sent her. It wasn't long after that she killed her first target. _Target._ A cold way to dehumanize another human being. It wasn't as if the man was an angel sent from heaven. Oh no.

He had a dark past and an increasingly violent future. He had his finger in all the big crime pies - guns, laundering, trafficking, drugs, you name it. But the one that Mac respected the least was drugs. Not after her parents. And so she'd done as she was told. Her first mission was successful.

It was like coming up for air and drowning at the same time. She'd lost part of herself and could never go back. So she shoved her doubts aside, and did the best job she could. There were caveats. She was careful to inspect every target; she wouldn't kill an innocent, and she absolutely wouldn't go near children. And for quite a few years, she was successful.

And then something changed. She wanted out, away from the goddamn control and back to a freedom that she hadn't really had since college. She knew, deep down, that she was running from the problem, but she worked her way out and was honorably discharged into a world that didn't remember her.

Mac didn't have much choice than to do what she knew best. She took up contract killing, going by the name Kennie, relying on friends she'd made in the military to get her into it, and then building up a network as she went. She developed a reputation for pickiness. She would thoroughly research each target before accepting a job. But she was damn good at what she did, and that meant good money.

She kept a low profile - living in her truck or in and out of cheap hotels. She made contacts and some friends, some romantic, mostly otherwise, but stayed nowhere too long. It wasn't until Sacramento that she met Clay Morrow and Bobby Elvis. It was a favor for a friend; she was meeting with them about a job. Mac had thoroughly enjoyed the look on their faces when she introduced herself.

 _"Who're you?" came the drunken question from a fat man with a lot of curly hair._

 _Mackenzie laughed from under her hooded sweatshirt._

 _"I'm your contact, Elvis." she said, and the man's eyes widened._

 _The one with the white-tipped hair smiled menacingly, taking in her small frame. The sweatshirt didn't hide that fact._

 _"You're a wannabe. We didn't come here for a little boy." he growled. "Get out."_

 _Before they could blink, Mac had pulled out her switchblade, and jammed it between Clay's fingers resting on the table. The blade just barely sliced open the side of one finger, and the man hissed at the sting._

 _"There's nothing_ boyish _about me, Mr. Morrow." she whispered, shaking back her hood. She pulled back, enjoying the surprise in their faces._

 _"Besides," she said, sitting down, "little doesn't mean shit in my business." She grinned at them. "I'm Kennie, short for Mackenzie."_

 _She stole Bobby's shooter and downed it._

 _"Ugh, vodka." She screwed up her face at the burn. "What does a girl have to do to get some good whisky around here?"_

Eventually, once the boys had gotten over their surprise, she'd accepted their offered job. The pair had just come from a wedding, so they were already half in the bottle, and it didn't take much prodding on Mac's part to learn more about them.

They were Sons of Anarchy members, from Charming, CA. Mac genuinely liked them. Something about the camaraderie they described appealed to her. And it felt a little like fate when they'd mentioned Charming. That was Tara's hometown.

Mac had met Tara Knowles in Chicago, in college. The two had been fair hell-raisers for a while, before Mac had left for the military. Tara had told her bits and pieces about her childhood in Charming, but nothing too in-depth. Mac had known that the Sons had chapters all over the States, so it hadn't occurred to that this pair would be from Tara's hometown. But here they were.

It had presented an opportunity to Mac, who was getting tired of all the running around. She wanted to stop in one place for a while. Charming seemed to satisfy her needs - off the map, quiet, with an open teaching job that would take her languages degree, and, of course, the Sons. They'd make life interesting, and if she did the job right, perhaps they'd even be protection from her past if she ever needed it.

This would've been enough for Mac. But on top of that, Tara was going back. She'd aired her concerns about this shitty ex of her's; Kohn, and Mac had in return told Tara about her growing desire to stop running. Tara had always known the outlines of Mac's life, but never any details. It was a mark of their friendship, that she accepted Mac's explanation without further questions.

And so it had been settled. Mac would finish the job for the Sons, then head to Charming. She'd get Tara's house opened and set up and the two would live there together. Tara would work at the hospital, and Mac would teach. It would be _charming._ Mac laughed to herself. _Or something._ she thought.

—


	2. Chapter 1

AN: Hey guys! This is the first "real" chapter of the story. This is going to be a bit of a slow burn, but eventually we'll get there. For now, I'm keeping it at T. I'm new to fanfiction, so if it's under/over rated, just let me know. Also, all mistakes are my own. I'll be following most of the plot through the first season, but at the end, it won't follow at all. As we go through the second and third season, things will really start to change. It's not AU, exactly, but one character that dies will remain alive in my story. Tara and Donna's personality might also be a little AU. I'm going to update as often as possible - I have a lot of it written already. This is my first story, so be kind, but let me know what to work on! Thanks, above all, for reading. x

* * *

It hadn't taken long for Tara and Mac to fall right back in to the easy friendship they'd had. It was good for both of them, letting loose a little again. They'd been fairly wild in college, so it shouldn't've come as a surprise to either of them that their night out on the town ended as it did.

It was innocent, really. They'd gotten a little dressed up and gone to a bar the next town over that boasted some signature cocktails and good music. Mac hadn't had the opportunity to dress up in a long time, and Tara was just happy to be able to let loose without the threat of Kohn around.

Of course, nothing is ever so simple. They'd gotten tipsy, they'd sung their hearts out, they'd danced like crazy people, and in all of this, they never saw four Sons of Anarchy members walk in to the bar. Clay, Bobby, Tig, and Chibs. Mac wasn't usually so careless, but her attention had been diverted by the absolute creep refusing to take his hands off Tara.

Mac was standing by the bar, nursing a beer, when she saw the creep forcibly start to drag Tara off of the dance floor and to the back door. _Nu-uh buddy._ Mac thought, putting down her beer and following them. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed the four kuttes standing by the door. She cursed quietly at their timing, but continued after Tara.

She heard Tara's yell just as she walked out the back door into the alley. Mac's first kick at the man was thoughtless and instinctual, aimed at his waist. Tara helped her out then, freed enough to knee him in the balls.

"Excuse me, sir." Mac said. "Sorry to break up this little party."

"Bitch." the man spat at her. Mac tilted her head, like she was viewing a museum exhibit.

"Well, we can't have that." she said, dropping down over him, pinning his arms to the ground with her knees, and giving him a solid punch to the face. He grunted.

"Now, let me say this." Mac said. "If you put a hand on my friend again, I'll kill you."

"She asked for it." the man said, around a mouthful of blood.

"Oh, she did? How, may I ask? With words? A song and dance? Miming?" Mac giggled to herself. "See, I don't think she did, so I'd shut the fuck up and heed my warning if I was you."

She punched him again, this time on the other side.

"On top of that, here's a small hint for the future. If a woman wants you, you'll know. If she doesn't want you, you'll know. Her not wanting you is not an invitation for you to try to make her change her mind. You'll have infinitely better relationships if you start to think that. Now, my friend and I have a lovely evening to return to, so this is, unfortunately, goodbye."

She reared back, and broke his jaw with a final well-placed punch. When she stood up, he wasn't moving.

"He's not dead, right?" Tara asked.

"Nah, probably just passed out from the pain. Let's get going."

The two walked out of the alley, hand in hand, only to be confronted by four large, glowering, Sons of Anarchy brothers.

—

Not a lot surprised Chibs anymore. He'd seen too much. So when Clay dragged the group of Sons out to the alley, he'd mostly expected to beat the shit out of a guy with no boundaries, and play Prince Charming to a couple of damsels in distress.

Thus his surprise when he saw a slight-looking woman take down and beat the shit out of the man. He grinned at her insouciant way of informing the man on the ways of wooing women, and was happy to just watch the show she put on.

She was slight, but clearly strong. Her voice carried a British accent, and a fair bit of steel. From afar, he could admire her ass in the black jeans she was wearing, and the mane of crazy black curls that had come out of the bun she was currently sporting. Clay motioned for the group to stop at the edge of the alley when it was clear the woman had the situation under control.

When she was done with the man - the crack of his jaw had made even Tig wince - the girls linked arms and turned around, surprise at the waiting Sons showing on their faces. She had green eyes and a pretty face that she had tried to tone down, with a smattering of freckles. _Not one to be noticed, huh._ thought Chibs. As he looked her up and down, his hands twitched, thinking of making a home in her hair. _Sex curls,_ he thought absentmindedly, and then caught himself, putting a mask over his features and waiting for her or her partner to speak.

—

"Clay!" Tara said in surprise. Mac just nodded her hello.

"Had an eventful night, have we, ladies?" Clay asked, and Mac was somewhat relieved to see the glower give way to slight amusement.

"Good to see you haven't changed much, Mackenzie." Mac gave him a slight grin. "I was expecting you to show up soon, though maybe not in such a dramatic way. For a woman who tries to be low-key, you sure drew our attention."

Now Mac gave him a full grin. "Not my fault. Tara here caught the man's eye. He decided to… try too hard, so I gave him a quick lesson to fill in the gaps in his education. Hopefully he decides to apply them."

One of the Sons that Mac didn't recognized gave a bark of laughter. "He won' be applyin' anythin' fo' a while, no' with tha' jaw."

 _Hello, Mr. Scot._ Mac thought. She liked the burr, wouldn't mind hearing more of it. The Scot's sharp brown eyes met hers, and she squashed the warm wave of heat that went through her, settling in her stomach. _Uh-uh Mackenzie,_ she said to herself, _not a Son._ So she gave him a smiled, letting the moment pass.

"Well, I may have gone slightly overboard, but he deserved it. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to be gone before he wakes up."

Clay nodded. "You'll be in Charming now?" he asked, and Mac nodded.

"Come by tomorrow morning, for church. I'll properly introduce you to the club. I'm sure you've got something for us as well." Mac nodded again.

Bobby and Clay were exactly as Mac remember them. The Sons of the Scottish accent and the one with the bright blue eyes were more mysterious.

"For now, this is Chibs and Tig." Clay said, motioning to Chibs and Tig in turn. _Chibs, huh._ Mac though. _Gotta be a nickname._ She was willing to bet his parents didn't name him after a Scottish knife. He was a nice picture to take in. Tall, broad shoulders, a well-defined body under his black, long-sleeved shit over which he wore his kutte. He had a handsome face, made sightly more sinister looking by the scars on either cheek. _A Glasgow smile._ She seen them before. His slightly wild, long-ish dark hair put him firmly in Mac's category, but she reminded herself firmly that he was a Son, and looked away.

The other one, Tig, had wildly blue eyes and dark hair as well. He looked slightly maniacal.

"Wanna come for a ride, darlin'?" Tig asked her, but before Mac could respond Clay elbowed him.

"This isn't a croweater, Tiggy." Clay said.

"Mackenzie." Mac said, giving the guys another nod. "Maybe another time, Tiggy, but… probably not." She grinned at him, and he returned it.

"Now, again, we've really gotta be going. I don't want to be here when he wakes up." Mac said, and the guys nodded, leading the way to the parking lot. They split to their respective vehicles, Mac promising again to come by the clubhouse the next morning.

—

He wanted to hear her speak again. He listened to Clay greet he women with half an ear, more focused on the woman he called Mackenzie, and he mouth that was twisted into a grin.

"Not my fault. Tara here caught the man's eye. He decided to… try too hard, so I gave him a quick lesson to fill in the gaps in his education. Hopefully he decides to apply them."

When he heard the answer, Chibs couldn't keep in his laugh. "He won' be applyin' anythin' for a while, no' with tha' jaw."

The green eyes met his gaze, and he thought he might've briefly seen a spark of desire before it disappeared under her cool mask. Chibs just kept grinning as she explained herself. When Clay introduced him and Tig, he watched Mackenzie carefully, noting when she took stock of his appearance, and didn't flinch at this scars. That was unusual. The heat he felt when she looked at him was unusual as well.

"Wanna come for a ride, darlin'? Tig asked her, and Chibs could've socked him. He felt slightly mollified when Clay told Tig to back off, and Mac turned him down neatly. More curious than anything, though, because Clay and Bobby seemed to know the woman. Who was she? Unfortunately for his curiosity, Mac seemed to want to leave - probably smart - and so Chibs' questions would have to wait until the next morning.

—


	3. Chapter 2

When Mac showed up the next morning, she was greeted by Clay, Bobby, and a striking woman who must've been Gemma, Clay's wife. Clay motioned her over.

"Hey guys." Mac said, walking over to them. Bobby gave her a hug.

"Who would've thought we'd see the Brit around again?" Bobby said, in a horrid impersonation of her accent.

Mac rolled her eyes. The striking woman stepped forward, holding out her hand.

"Gemma." she said. Mac shook it, nodding.

"Mackenzie." she said.

"My wife." Clay said, putting a hand on Gemma's lower back. Mac got the impression that she wasn't to be messed with, but Mac was a strong woman herself. She met Gemma's appraising gaze solidly.

"So," Clay said, "it's almost time for church. You ready to tell your story?" Mac broke gaze with Gemma and nodded to Clay, following him and Bobby into the clubhouse.

—

The clubhouse was as the guys had described it. Sons paraphernalia everywhere, mug shots on a wall, fully-stocked bar, couple crow eaters wandering around. There was a blond guy with a prospect kutte on doing some cleaning. She followed the guys into their chapel. It had a hardwood table with a reader carved in the middle, and was surrounded by Sons. Bobby and Clay joined them, leaving Mac to stand against the back wall. She crossed her arms and observed.

"Let me do some introductions." Clay said. "You know me and Bobby, you've met Chibs and Tig. That's Opie and his old man Piney, and that's Juice." Opie was a big bear of a man, and Piney was hooked up to an oxygen machine. Juice actually managed to smile at her, and Mac gave me a small grin in return.

"This is Mackenzie Torrell." Clay said. "She took care of our problem up in Washington." The table relaxed slightly with the recognition. "So, Mac, this is your story."

"You know," Mac began, "I didn't understand at first how the Mayans, Niners, and Sons could agree to anything. Well, now that the job's done, I get it. Your man went down, no problem. He knows you guys had at least a part in arranging his death, and promises revenge, et cetera, et cetera. I wouldn't worry too much about it, they all say that."

"They all do, do they?" Tig asked, clearly in disbelief. Mac narrowed her eyes at him.

"In the end," she said, choosing her words carefully, "you lot are all the same. Making promises you can't keep. Though I supposed you do that all your lives. And us girls end up having to take _drastic_ measures." Mac allowed the innuendo to seep into her voice. Tig broke out into a grin that would've had a lesser woman backing away. Mac wasn't a lesser woman.

"It's real unfortunate you haven't met a man who keeps his _promises._ Maybe I can help." Tig leered at her, and Mac smiled in return.

"Promises, promises, mate." she said, and turned back to Clay.

"You know the gist of why I'm here. I came looking for a place to settle for a while, and Charming has an open job and a friend. And the club." Mac said. "But fair warning. I was never your average solider. I made some enemies in the military, and they aren't your average enemies, and they've not forgotten me. When they find me, they'll find everyone that I'm close to. These people _hate_ me, Clay. I can't stress that enough. I'm telling you this because it's your town, and I'm gonna be here for a while."

Clay nodded. "What's the job?" he asked.

"I'm teaching at the elementary school. I did earn a degree before I left for the military." Mac said with a grin. She knew it was an odd career change. "But I'll be doing some contract work on the side, and if you guys ever need me I'll be around. Look, if I bring enemies to your doorstep, you can bet I'll take care of them. But you guys don't exactly fly under the radar. I can't promise they won't try and involve you."

It was silent for a few moments, before Clay nodded. "You did as a favor in Washington, and a good job at that. I have no problem with you coming to Charming. I suspect you and Tara will add some fun, and I know you can take care of yourself. If the guys have no objections, we'll formally welcome you to Charming, make ya a friend of the club. We'll treat your… erm… night-job as club business."

Mac was surprised, knowing how much of a deal that was. The friendship and protection would be welcome. Clay looked around the table.

"Any objections?"

"Yeah," said Opie, "just who are you?"

Mac paused. "My history's a bit… complicated. I'm ex-military, was an enforcer for a while, then made some enemies and left. Took up contracting for a couple years, and then decided to settle down. Met Bobby and Clay through a job. Tara Knowles - I think you guys know her - is a friend of mind from college; she said she was moving back here and offered me a place. The rest is personal." Mac was firm on this, and Opie gazed at her coolly, but nodded to Clay.

"No other objections?" the president asked. There were none, so her tapped the gavel, and they all stood to leave.

"There's a party this Friday, if you're interested." he said to Mac, and she nodded.

"Welcome to the family, luv." said Chibs as he passed her, and Mac smiled. Life in this little town would certainly be interesting.

—

Mac was just finishing up her morning run when she heard the Harley in the distance. It'd been a busy first week; getting ready for the school year to start, turning Tara's house into a home, and getting to know the town. The Sons were always on the back of her mind, but she hadn't really interacted with them since their meeting.

Every now and then her mind would drift back to Chibs, against her will. Dark hair, dark eyes, and a wicked smirk. Dimples emphasized by his scars. Mac grinned to herself, before remembering that she was firmly _not interested._ It just couldn't be right now. There was too much in her past.

Mac shook her head as she reached the front steps of her and Tara's place, pushing those thoughts to the back of her head, and focusing on her chores for the day.

—

The loud rock music reverberated underneath her and Tara's shoes as they climbed the steps to the clubhouse. They were dressed conservatively in comparison to the croweaters. Mac had laughed when Tara said they looked like biker chicks.

The smoke hit them like a wall when they walked in the front door. It was the prospect that spotted them first.

"Hey guys!" he yelled drunkenly. Mac grinned.

"Hey Sack. What've you gotten yourself into already, mate?"

"S' a lil bitofa drinkin game with Tiggy." he said, slurring his words pretty well. "Ya guys wanna drink?"

Mac and Tara looked at each other, and grinned. "Shall we show them how to party?" Tara asked her, and Mac simply motioned for her to lead the way.

With Half-Sack acting as bartender, they made short work of a couple rounds of shots, and settled on some beer. Tig wandered over, watching them drink.

"Slow down, girls!" Tig called. "We don't wanna be sweeping you off the floor." Tara and Mac just grinned at him.

"We learned to hold our liquor the hard way, Tig, but thanks for the concern." said Mac. "Yeah, and if you get this one drunk enough, she might just show you how a keg handstand works. It's pretty impressive." Tara followed up. Mac rolled her eyes. Tara never could let that one go.

When Tig didn't respond, Mac looked over at him. His mouth was open just slightly, like he was picturing what he'd just heard. "I rather like you silent and impressed, Tig." said Mac, and the other Sons that had come up chuckled.

When Mac had lost Tara to the dancing crowd, she decided to go take a closer look at the wall of mug shots. There was one of almost everyone, from various ages. As she looked, she felt a presence at her shoulder. Mac turned, eyeing the rather scary-looking Son that stood behind her.

"Mackenzie." she said, holding out a hand.

The man looked at his as if sizing her up.

"Happy." he said, looking anything but, and shook her hand.

They stood silently for a while, looking at the wall of mug shots.

"I get smiley face tattoos." Happy said, eventually, and Mac gave him a look asking him to explain the non-sequitur.

He lifted up his shirt, showing off a path of smiley faces among the many tattoos covering his torso.

"When I kill someone." he said.

Mac just stared, wondering how he knew. He hadn't been in the room, but he was clearly a patched member. _Club secret._ Mac remembered.

"I got one for my first one. Skull on my ankle. Target was wearing a skull necklace. Couldn't get it out of my head." she said. "But how'd you know?"

Happy regarded her carefully. "You're on guard, you're carrying two knives and a gun, even at a party where you're fairly protected. You're dressed to fit in, not to draw attention, and you're alone. I'm in the same line of work as you. I know the signs."

Mac was silent. Not troubled, just now slightly paranoid.

"It's a tough job." Happy went on. "You have to find the joy in it."

It was a macabre statement, but she understood what Happy was saying. She turned to respond, only to find that Happy had melted into the shadows, as Tig had decided to make his was towards them.

Tig greeted her with a grin. "Enjoying the party?" he asked. "Saw you met Happy."

"Well enough, yeah." Mac said, not responding to the second part of his statement.

"I can make good on my promise, ya know." Tig said, referencing their earlier conversation in church. "We have rooms here."

Mac sighed. "Sorry mate, but I'm not here to make those sort of friends." she said.

"Are ya sure?" Tig asked. "I'm not the only one looking at you like this." He made a motion towards where Chibs sat on a couch, bookended by croweaters.

It was true, Mac knew. His eyes had been on and off her all night. There was a burning sensation when he was watching her, so Mac always knew.

"Don't worry sweetheart, I can still take some of the edge off…" he trailed off, pushing his body against hers… and coming to a sudden stop when he felt the switchblade pressed against his balls.

"One wrong move, Tig, and I'll take those _drastic measures_ I talked about." Mac growled in his ear. Tig back away quickly.

"Sorry, sorry." He held his hands up in a gesture of innocence.

Mac shook her head. Against her better judgement, she liked the man. But she wasn't here to be a doormat for anyone.

"Just making a point." she said. "Like I said, I'm not here to make those type of friends."

"Now that," said Tig, "I believe. But it might find you, girlie. When you least expect it."

—

The party had gotten a lot more interesting when Tara and Mac had walked in. They were dressed to fit in, and Chibs had a feeling that Mac could wear a potato sack and he'd still think she looked good.

He kept an eye on her all night, noting the stiffening of her shoulders every now and then, as if she noticed when he looked over at her. He'd thought about her every now and then over the past week. He was curious, yes, and he wanted to sleep with her, yes, but there was something else.

He was most disturbed by the fact that he thought she was pretty. He didn't think girls were pretty. The crow eaters were definitely not pretty, and while Gemma was beautiful, she was much more a mother figure. He hadn't though anyone pretty since Fiona. And that freaked him out a little.

What he really wanted to do was take her back into the dorm room and fuck her into the bed, but thankfully, the brain in his larger head won out. This was also slightly disturbing; normally it was the opposite head that won. Something was keeping him from treating this woman like another piece of ass, and it wasn't that she'd been made a friend of the club. Chibs shook his head, not wanting to deal with it anymore, and turned his attention back to the pool game he was watching. But he still kept looking back to Mac.

—

It was a while later that he was on a couch, a crow eater on either side, not really paying much attention to anything but Mac, who was standing by the mug shots talking to Happy. Happy was a hard man to read, but he seemed to accept Mac, and Mac hadn't run away screaming, so that was a plus. Then there was Tig, whom Chibs should've known would try something. The blade to the balls had made him chuckle; Mac knew how to stand up to Tig.

Now it was his turn, he thought, standing up and pushing the two crow eaters away. Mac was now by the door, standing with Tara, who was swaying with drunkenness. They were clearly getting ready to leave. Mac forcefully sat Tara down on the couch, saying something about a bottle of water, and giving the prospect a pleading look.

Mac watched Chibs walk over to her, and felt the usual swirl in her abdomen, but this time decided to say fuck it. The straightened, meeting his gaze.

Chibs walked purposefully forward, until he'd invaded Mac's personal space. She allowed herself to be backed up until she hit the wall behind her.

Mac was warm all over. Something electric was happening here, she could feel the current between the two of them like it was palpable.

"Chibs." she said quietly, meeting his gaze.

"Mackenzie." God, did she love the way he said her name. Chibs felt the current as well, pulling him closer to Mac, bracing an arm on either side of her head. Mac could smell him; tobacco, leather, gasoline, whisky, and something sharper that was him and him alone. She reached up, her hands moving without express permission from her brain, and traced his scars.

"Glasgow smile." Mac practically whispered. When she touched him, Chibs felt his scars burn. He wanted to jump out of his skin. He wanted to drag Mac far away and not let her out of his room until morning. Or even then, maybe.

"Sometimes I forget' they're there." he said. The heat continued to build between the two of them, Mac staying silent, letting Chibs take the first step forward, closer, closer, until…

"Kenzie!" Tara yelled, and Chibs and Mac jumped apart. Chibs was still heated, and he could see the flush on Mac's face, but there was nothing he could do as Mac and Tara bundled out of the clubhouse and into the car. Mac was stopped after she'd gotten Tara strapped in, by Gemma.

Mac had kept of a litany of self-abuse as soon as she and Chibs had separated. _What am I doing?_ she thought. _This isn't what I'm here for. I can't. I'd just put him in danger. It would only give Peter leverage, and besides, he's a Son. Plus he'd never want anything to do with me again once he finds out what happened. No, bad idea Mac, bad idea._

Gemma's hand on her shoulder stopped her from getting into the car.

"How ya doin', sweetie?" she asked. "I saw ya leave. You and Chibs just about burned the place down in here; I figured we wouldn't see you leave without doing something about it."

Mac sighed. "It was nothing Gemma."

Gemma shook her head. "What are you worried about?" the biker queen asked.

"Just old fears." Mac said, brushing it off.

"Yeah, well, we all have those, hun." Gemma said. "But here we're family, and family takes care of family. The boys made you a friend of the club; that means more than you think. But clearly, we're gonna have to take baby steps here. We're having family dinner on Sunday, you should join us."

Mac sat very still, unsure of what to make of the offer. She hadn't had many friends, and nothing resembling family since before college. Love was largely absent from her life, and in only a few weeks it was clear that love was something the Sons had in abundance.

"Come and eat and enjoy some family time." Gemma finished, and Mac gave a small nod. Maybe it was time to try to find a family.

—


	4. Chapter 3

AN: Hello again! We're making some progress now. I'm pretty sure the rating it going to change to M, but we haven't gotten there yet, so for now I'll leave it as T. As always, enjoy reading!

Mac was out on the front porch with a cup of coffee when Chibs drove up. Tara was till fast asleep, sleeping off the excesses of the night before. Chibs had decided that after their encounter last night, he wanted to talk to the girl.

 _What does he want?_ thought Mac.

"Good morning, darlin'." Chibs said as he walked up her front steps.

"Hey Chibs." Mac said, indicating that he should have a seat. "What can I do for you?"

"I wanted ta talk about las' night." he said. Mac had been pretty sure this was coming, but sighed nonetheless.

"I didn't come here to make those kinds of friends, Chibs." Mac said. "I know what this feels like, the weird electricity that we've got going, like if we ever hooked up the sheets would spontaneously combust. But the sex isn't my problem."

Chibs was grinning at her then, agreeing with her assessment of their chemistry.

"Stop grinning." Mac said. "I can't. I've got a past that's gonna catch up with me, and I'm not going to put that on anyone else's shoulders."

Chibs regarded her carefully. This was clearly going to take some work. She wasn't going to be persuaded so easily. He needed time. So when she stuck out her hand and said "Friends?" he shook it. Friends could get to know each other.

 _What is she hiding?_ Chibs wanted to know.

"Friends i'is, then, darlin'." he said, and sat back. _Friends, my pale Scottish arse._ he thought. As far as he was concerned, this was just time for him to break past her cool exterior. He gave it a couple weeks at most.

She favored him with a true smile, then, and he was just about blinded. It was a smirk or a grin, it was a full on smile. He needed to see that more often. They talked for a while about things of no consequence - favorite movies, colors, books - Mac told him about college and some funny stories about her and Tara, and Chibs returned the favor with stories of the guys. They avoided, with unspoken consent, too much detail about their pasts. Chibs mentioned briefly his time in Belfast, but gave no details.

They found each other easy to talk to, and this just confirmed in Chibs' mind that there was a good reason for him to get to know this girl. She was a bundle of contradictions. A contract killer who doubled as a teacher. A woman with a dark past and a deadly job who seemed to have such a capacity to love. One who wouldn't let herself get close to a man because of her past. She was well worth the trouble, Chibs decided. Now he just needed a way in.

—

They didn't see each other again until the family dinner that Gemma had invited her to. Tara was on shift at the hospital, and thus unable to come. Gemma had called earlier in the day, asking Mac to come over a few hours early to help with cooking, and so there she was, knocking on Gemma's front door around 5:45.

An unfamiliar blonde woman answered the door. She stuck out her hand immediately.

"Hi sweetie." she said. "I'm Luann Delaney, Otto's old lady. Gem said we were expecting you."

"Mac." Mac said, shaking her hand. They walked inside together, and Mac allowed herself to be shepherded into the kitchen, plied with a glass of wine, and put to work. There were a few crow eaters in the kitchen, and Mac tried her best to make small talk. She had nothing against them - most of them were porn stars working under Luann, and who was Mac to tell them how to make money, considering what she did for a living.

Gemma and Luann realized fairly quickly that Mac had few skills in the kitchen, and put her to work chopping. The crow eaters accepted her fast enough, and soon the kitchen was live with conversation. Mac was surprised to find that she was actually enjoying herself.

Soon, the house started to fill with guests. Mac met Donna, Opie's wife, and quickly picked up on some tension between her and the rest of the club members. She took an immediate liking to the woman, however, and her kids.

The guys showed up in twos and threes; Juice looking like he'd been in a fight. "Fuckin' street thugs." Mac heard Bobby mutter to Clay. Gemma just smiled gamely and took Juice into the kitchen for some quick first aid. The crow eaters plied everyone with drinks and they all sat around waiting for dinner.

Chibs showed up last, announcing himself with his distinctive brogue. He gave Mac a hug and a brush on the cheek, and left her to her tasks. The house was packed - it was loud, warm, and friendly. Mac was totally out of her element. Gemma picked up on her discomfort quickly.

"Come on sweetie." she said. "Let's go find some family."

Mac stayed by Gemma as the queen called for dinner, and allowed herself to be seated next to Tig.

"Mackie!" he called, patting the seat next to him. Tig and Gemma didn't miss the glare Chibs sent Tig. Chibs didn't miss the minute way Mac stiffened when Tig called out that particular nickname.

Mac groaned. "If you call me that again, _Tiggy,_ I will have to take drastic measures." she said, setting a final dish down on the table and taking her seat. She had suppressed the shivers that came with the memories of that name. No one had called her that in a very long time.

Tig apologized as well as he could and offered her a beer in payment. Mac just rolled her eyes, accepting.

"Tiggy, why is it you want a blade pressed to your junk?" Bobby asked. Tig blanched, clearly the story of Mac's switchblade had spread. Mac fingered the steak knife beside her plate, catching the light. Tig shifted away from her slightly, and the table broke out in sniggers.

"Finally, someone who scares Tig." said Bobby. "Besides Happy, of course."

The man himself just looked at Bobby steadily. "Pass the peas." he deadpanned, but Mac didn't miss the small grin he sent her way.

—

Mac sat back, full to bursting. Family dinner, she had found, was a lovely experience. Around her, people argued good-naturedly, caught up on each others lives, or just chatted mindlessly. When the food was gone, the guys took the dishes into the kitchen and the kids ran off the play, supervised by the croweaters. Mac found herself sitting surrounded by the Sons and their old ladies, cigar smoke filling the air.

"So what'd you think?" Gemma asked her.

Mac sighed. "It was really lovely, Gemma." she said. "I didn't know I was missing so much." Her voice was tinged with sadness. Gemma made a sympathetic noise in the back of her throat as someone set a tumbler of something brown-colored in front of Mac.

"Jameson okay, luv?" Chibs asked her, and Mac nodded, giving him a smile. He returned with a wink, lightly brushing her cheek when he pulled his hand back. Mac's cheek broke out in tingles. Her decisions concerning Chibs didn't make him any easier to ignore. And now, he sat across from her, staring at her from over his beer, not every trying to be subtle. Mac did her best to ignore him.

Mac sat lazily next to Gemma while the guys played poker beside them, fighting weariness and drooping eyelids. The drinking and smoking had deepened Chibs' accent, and Mac felt it roll her, trying not to stare at him. She caught herself drifting off once or twice, before she fell too far…

 _"…can't escape." Peter was saying. He was talking to Mac, holding her in her chair by her wrists, standing in front of it and leaning into her face._

 _"It's done now, and they'll know it was you. You broke your promise, and you did it for me. Don't forget that." But Mac was twisting her head from side to side, trying to avoid the stale tobacco smoke smell of his breath and the twisted words on it._

 _"No one will want you, if they find out about this. You're mind now. There's no escape, Mackie."_

 _Mac moaned. She kept twisted, trying to escape Peter's grasp…_

Mac's own movements woke her up. Her eyes snapped open, heart pounding, following her instincts. She stood up, too fast, and gathered the attention of the room.

"I… um… Thank you for dinner, Gemma, Clay." she said. "It was lovely." She gave the woman a small kiss on the cheek before taking one last wild glance around and leaving quickly.

The room was quiet after Mac's abrupt departure.

"Was it something I said?" tig asked, not all-together jokingly.

"It's her past." It was Happy that responded, taking a drag on his cigar. "Ghosts."

 _Ghosts._ thought Chibs. Another layer to her secrets.

—

As soon as Mac escaped the house, she'd gone to her truck. Still too keyed up to drive, she hoisted herself into the bed and then up on the cab, and laid down. Her truck was far enough from the driveway that, as the guys started to leave, she thought she'd be hidden well enough.

She could still hear Peter saying _Mackie, Mackie, Mackie_ over and over again in hear head. Peter followed her around, like a talented stalker that she couldn't shake. She laid there, listening to a Harley or a car leave every now and then, taking deep breaths. Reminding herself that she was in a small town in the middle of nowhere, and Peter probably had no idea where she was.

Mac wasn't stupid, though. Peter could and would find her. It really was just a matter of time, and if she was honest with herself, part of the reason for settling down was to draw him to her. She wanted him gone. But if he found her, she wouldn't be the only one in danger.

Eventually, she climbed down and got in her truck to head home. She didn't see Gemma and Clay watching from an upstairs window, or Chibs watching her from the front porch.

—

The next morning, Tara was making pancakes. Mac groaned when she walked into the kitchen, following her nose.

"You, my friend, are the greatest roommate ever." Mac said, sitting down with a cup of coffee.

Tara grinned at her. "Consider it repayment for getting me safely home. I had a good time the other night." Mac grinned at her.

"That I know." she said.

"I heard you and Chibs caused a little bit of a disturbance." Tara said.

Mac grimaced. "It was nothing. Small loss of sanity." she said. Tara just laughed.

It was clear Tara had something on her mind, so Mac sat quietly until she came out with it.

"What do you think of Jax?" Tara asked.

Mac knew of their history, so she wondered if this was coming. She shrugged.

"Smart, funny, built." Mac leered at her. "Your type." Tara blushed.

"I know." she said. "I didn't tell him I was coming back, you know. He was as surprised as anyone when Clay told him about that night at the club. I'm told he's married now, not that that stopped him Friday night."

"Well, I didn't see any old ladies with him at family dinner." Mac said. "I'm sure Gemma would've introduced me to her son's wife."

"Either way, I didn't come here for him." Tara said, shaking it off. Mac was silent. She had an inkling that things weren't over between Tara and Jax, but she wasn't one to interfere. She'd let her friend figure it out.

—

A few days later, the guys were in church, discussing the Mayans.

"We gotta do somethin' about them." Clay was saying. The Redwood Chapter sat around the table, listening.

"They're scrapping with friends up north, in Oregon and Washington. I'm sick of dealing with them. If this keeps up they could hit something more vital. I wanna send a message." There were nods around the table.

"How do we know it won't kick back on us?" Opie asked.

Clay sighed. "We don't. But if we don't attach ourselves to the attack, they're not gonna know who to retaliate against. They've got plenty of other enemies."

"What're you thinking?" asked Jax, with narrowed eyes.

"That we ask our new friend for some help." Clay said.

Chibs shifted, trying not to let his emotions show. He knew, intellectually, that this was Mac's job, but that didn't mean he had to like the club using her for their dirty work.

"What's the ask?" asked Jax.

"She wears no colors, and they don't see her. She's alone, she's quiet. She causes some mayhem, and gets the hell out. No harm to her."

"She's just a girl." Piney said.

"She's a very talented girl, old man." Clay said. "She'll be fine."

The table was quiet for a few minutes.

"She takes care of our shit. As long as none of the Mayans get a good look at her face, they won't even be able to connect her to us, much less us to the hit. Do I have to take a vote?" Clay asked.

The table was silent. Chibs held his tongue.

Clay's gavel hit the table.

"Tig and I'll go give her the good news." Clay said, and the Sons filed out of church.

—


	5. Chapter 4

The rumble of the Harleys let Mac know she was suddenly expecting visitors. She'd been making dinner when she heard them. With a sigh, she turned off the burner on the stove and went to look out the window. Tig and Clay were just parking their bikes in her driveway. She met them on the porch.

"Hey boys. What can I do for you?" she asked, motioning that they should sit.

"We need to ask you a favor." Clay said. Mac nodded. She'd been wondering when the first job would show up.

"Like I said a few weeks ago, anything." she said.

Clay leaned back. "We have some friends that need a boot up the ass, only they can't know it's our boot." he said. "Full disclosure or none at all?" he asked.

"Full." Mac said with no hesitation. She needed to know who the job was, and why.

Clay nodded to Tig.

"One of the other clubs we got beef with is the Mayans. They're annoying, but more recently they've been escalating. We'd like you to send them an anonymous message. The VP will be at a safe house about an hour and a half outside Charming. He'll have a couple patched brothers with him. Kill a couple, would the VP. Just enough to let them know someone can get to them. Don't show your face, don't wear colors, don't get caught. Blow some shit up. Cause some mayhem. Make a mess."

Mac nodded. "No problem. I'll do it. Get me an address, a time, and a picture of the VP. I'll bring firepower, but it'd be great if you guys could get me a loaner bike. Something small and quiet-ish."

Clay nodded. "We can do that. Let's make this next Saturday, okay? Meet at TM at 6pm."

Mac nodded again. "Alright." she said. "You'd better have a stiff drink for me when I get back." she said with a grin.

"Deal." Clay said, and he and Tig stood up to leave.

"Well, see ya Saturday." Tig said, and they guys left without further ado.

—

Mac pulled into the clubhouse at just before 6 on Saturday night. A hang-around shut the gate behind her. The parked her truck and hopped out, making sure she had everything. She was really loaded for bear, ready to make a mess, just as Tig said. She was dressed in all black - tight cargos, shitkicker boots, long-sleeve shirt, plus leather gloves and a scarf to pull up and hide the bottom half of her face. She strapped a flak vest over the shirt, and a utility belt on her waist.

Weapons-wise, she had her two Glocks strapped on either side, plus a knife in each boot, a couple strapped in other strategic places, and two small Beretta's in her belt and on her knee. For more serious firepower, she had am MP5 swung across her back, and was carrying a lengthened AK, specially for the VP.

The boys were milling around outside the garage, but so far, none of them had noticed her. Mac walked up, dropped the butt of the AK on the ground, and leaned on it, waiting.

It was Tig who noticed her first. He was talking to Chibs when he looked up and saw her. Chibs saw him do a double take, and then a triple take before looking up himself.

"Woah." said Tig, getting the whole groups' attention.

"Holy Mary, Mother o' God." Chibs muttered.

He was overcome by the sudden heat again, and he wanted more than anything to grab Mac and take her somewhere private for an extended amount of time. She was dressed for battle, hair down, sunglasses and cheeky grin firmly in place. Chibs took a deep breath, trying to suppress the sudden hard on her appearance had inspired.

There were a couple moments of quiet before, of all people, Happy broke the silence.

"Nice." he said, deadpan.

Chibs swallowed roughly as the grin on Mac's face widened. She pushed her sunglasses up and gave a little salute.

"G.I. Jane, at your service." she said.

"You are…" Bobby began, but trailed off. "Every little boy's wet dream." Tig supplied for him, and Mac blushed.

Clay stepped forward to shake her hand. "I'd give you a hug, but I'm not sure I'd survive." he said.

Mac shrugged. "You wanted a mess, you got it."

"Well," Clay said, "lets get you on your way. Crotch rocket's over there. Be safe, and remember, don't let them see you. We'll be here when you get back." Mac nodded, accepting the keys to the bike from Clay, and giving one last jaunty wave to the guys.

"Until then." she said, and without further ado, drove out of the lot.

Chibs watched her go. Clay was right, that bike definitely qualified as a crotch rocket. _If her legs can hold on to that, I wonder what else they can do._ Chibs thought. He had to force this thoughts back out of the gutter before they could go too far into a scenario involving Mac, him, his Harley, and very few clothes.

Tig noticed, however, and gave him a punch in the shoulder.

"See somethin' ya like, Chibby?" Tig asked, quietly.

"Wha' hot-blooded male wouldn't've liked tha' show, Tig?" Chibs returned, not sure he wanted to share his plans with Mac with just anyone yet.

Tig just grinned at him before leaving for the inside of the clubhouse.

—

The job had gone well. She'd shot the VP, straight in the thigh, no problem. Switching guns have him some time to escape, but not enough, because the MP5 took out most of the other patches that were there. Then she'd lit up the house, dumped a container of gasoline she'd found on the back porch, and started a fire, dumping her guns before she ran. No one saw her.

She hiked back to her bike, eyeing the flames as the reached over the tree tops. As the adrenaline wore off, she could feel a stinging in her right thigh. Mac looked down, and saw that one of the return fire bullets had caught her in the leg.

"Merde." Mac growled. Bloody MP always gave her position away.

It was only a flesh wound, but was bleeding pretty severely, so she took her scarf and wrapped above and on top of the wound, using it as a tourniquet and to protect it from the outside. Devoid of her two heavier guns, the trop would go slightly faster. She slid a pair of clear plastic glasses on, and took off.

—

It was 11:30ish before Chibs heard the sound of Mac's bike outside. Mac abandoned her glasses and hurried inside. Her leg burned with every step. Inside was just the Redwood Charter, Happy, and Gemma.

Chibs eyes narrowed when Mac walked in. She looked paler than usual, and something was tied around her leg. Was she limping?

Clay stood up to meet her.

"How'd it go, Rambo?" he asked. Mac gave him a thin smile.

"Job went fine. Fire seen for a couple miles, easily. Location is blown. I hightailed it out of there before the dicks showed up. Shot the VP, but watched him escape. He'll be limping for a while. Most, if not all of the other patches were shot." Mac finished with a shrug.

Clay nodded and held out his hand. Mac took a step forward to shake it, and went down like a bag of bricks. Clay caught her just before she hit the ground.

Chibs was up and out of his seat before he really knew what he was doing. He walked up to Mac and Clay, gently picking her up, and carrying her over the bar. He laid he down on her left side, keeping the weight off the cloth tied around her right leg. She wasn't outwardly showing pain, but Chibs could see the twinge in her eyes, and hear the pain in her thicker-than-usual accent. His did the same thing.

Mac gave him a smile. "You guys got a needle and thread?" she asked.

"I'll take care o' ya, luv." he said, untying the scarf slowly. The Sons fathered round. There were murmurs of appreciation as the would became clear.

"Jus' a flesh would, looks like. Pret'y deep though. Prospect, grab me a bottle of somethin' strong and my kit." Chibs said.

Half-Sack came back over with a bottle of some clear alcohol and a small medi-bag.

"You a doctor?" Mac asked.

"Was a medic, in the army." Chibs said. "Got court-martialed after five months."

Mac couldn't stop her lips from twitching from humor, despite the pain.

"Funny, I'm not sure if that makes me feel better or worse." she said.

Chibs smiled. "Brace yerself, funny girl." he said, "This is gonna sting jus' a wee bit." And he poured the alcohol on her cut.

Mac slamed her fist down on the bar, and swore; "Filho de uma puta de puta-mãe. Morte aos pequenos mexicanos."

Everyone paused to stare at her.

"What?" she asked. "It bloody well hurts."

"Was that… Portuguese?" Juice asked. Mac sighed.

"I was a languages major. I speak a fair few. That plus overseas stints in the military." she said. "Picked up Portuguese for a stint in Brazil with a lovely group of drug runners. It's fun to swear in." She shrugged as best she could from her prone position.

Chibs chuckled as he continued to wash out the cut.

"How's it look, Chibs?" she asked.

"Took some muscle with it, but nothin' some stitches and a couple o' shots cannae cure." he said. "I think it's stopped bleedin'. Find somethin' ta hold on ta. I'm gonna stitch it up."

"Don't worry, Chibs." Mac replied. "I've been stitched before, in worse conditions, by people who weren't my friends."

The Sons drifted away once it became clear that Mac was going to be okay. Juice remained, though, and sat down at a bar stool in front of her.

"What's the worst injury you've ever gotten?" he asked.

Mac bit her lip and thought back. She hadn't been seriously injured since the military.

"Drove over a bomb in an obscure region of Russia. I thought I would die that - FUCK me." She was interrupted by the first push of the needle through her leg. She'd forgotten how much stitches hurt.

Chibs paused for a second, her oath penetrating his brain.

"Gladly." he said, low and tight, and his hand just barely brushed her bum.

Mac blushed a deep shade of red, and she felt Chibs promise warm up her stomach. Thankfully, no one else had heard Chibs over the snickers at her exclamation.

"I forgot how much stitches hurt." Mac said by way of explanation, knuckles white as she hung on to the edge of the bar.

Juice looked sympathetic. "Have ya ever had a bullet removed?" he asked.

Mac nodded. "More than once."

Juice kept her distracted for the next few minutes as Chibs finished up, and wandered away once Mac was clearly out of the woods. The rest of the Sons followed his lead, drifting off to bed or home one by one. Once the stitches were done, Chibs cleaned the wound and bandaged it.

"Keep this clear, okay darlin'?" he said. "Donnae want it gettin' infected." He helped her sit up.

Mac, once again determined not to show pain, didn't flinch at the burn as she slid her legs over the edge of the bar.

Tig said good night once he saw Mac sitting up, and left the room, leaving Mac and Chibs alone. Chibs stood behind her, rubbing his hands up and down her arms. Mac tried her best to suppress the shivers.

"Are ya gonna be alright ta drive?" he asked, moving his hands to her shoulders and starting to massage them. Mac could only let out a sigh and nod; enjoying the feeling of his hands too much.

They were quiet for a while, Mac slowly relaxing in his arms. She leaned back into his solid chest, unable to hold herself up. Chibs took advantage of the position to moving the short hair off of where it covered her neck down to the first bump of her spine. He gave the bump a soft kiss.

"I love ya hair, ya know." he said quietly. "It's wild, and lovely, and it smells good." He pressed another kiss to her neck, slightly higher up. "Jus' like you." Mac let out a tiny whimper and let her head roll forward a little more. Chibs took this as an invitation, and ran his hands down from her shoulders to her waist, where they splayed out. His thumbs massaged her lower back.

"Why do ya continue ta deny this, luv?" he asked. When Mac didn't respond, Chibs sighed.

"Truth?" he said. "I don' wanna be just friends, I didn' ever want that. But I'm no' stupid, lovely. Yer no crow eater. I think you'd be dynamite in bed, but that's no' the only thing I'm after." He gave her neck another kiss.

"Mackenzie?" he asked, at her lack of response.

It was Chibs saying her name that shocked her out of her stupor. He felt her stiffen in his arms.

"I… I can't, Chibs, no matter how much I want to." Mac said, pulling away slightly.

But Chibs tightened his grip, determined to get answers before she walked away again. "Why no'?" he growled.

"I _can't._ " she said again.

"Ya already said tha'. _Why not,_ Mackenzie _?_ " he asked again.

"If I told you, you'd hate me." she said quietly. "I'm dangerous and I'm not a good person. Not relaly. I'm a _killer_ , Chibs. You can't possibly want a killer. Besides, there are things in my past that would come and hurt you I… _I just can't_." She twisted out of his grip and slid off the bar, remembering to land on her good leg.

Mac looked at Chibs' face, hardened. It was his eyes that hurt the most. Deep brown and angry, calling her on her shit. The lines around them were tight. He didn't get it, he wasn't listening to her.

"You don't understand." she practically whispered. And she limped out of the clubhouse.

Chibs heard her truck start, and jumped like the sound had shocked him. _She's not the only killer in this house._ he thought. _It's not like the Sons are any better than she is._ He felt the anger bubble up inside him. _Why won't she just tell me? What could she have possibly done?_

Chibs took a deep breath, realizing that his anger got him nowhere. He needed a better reason than danger to stay away from Mac. She was a special woman, and every time she showed him more of herself, he saw that true more and more clearly. He'd never let danger keep him away from anything before, why start now? He decided to go find Mac tomorrow, and figure this shit out.

He wouldn't get the chance. That night, the Mayans blew up their gun warehouse.

—


	6. Chapter 5

AN: The biggest problem in Mac's past is coming up in this chapter! I'm definitely going to change the rating to M - not for this chapter, but for future ones. Also, since I've gotten a few questions about it, I want to make clear this is a Chibs/OC story, though Tara and Jax will remain together, as will Clay and Gemma. Just wanted to clear up any confusion. Thanks for reading, and enjoy!

Mac was thinking about Chibs again. Convincing herself that it couldn't go anywhere. Tara was making them breakfast, oblivious to Mac's inner battle.

"Mac." Tara called, but she was so lost in herself she didn't hear. "Mac!" Tara yelled, making Mac jump. Mac hissed at the sting this caused in her wound.

"What? Sorry, lost for a second." Mac said and Tara smiled.

"You want berries in these?" Tara asked. She was making pancakes for them. Mac nodded and smiled her thanks.

"Still hurting?" Tara asked with sympathy. "Whoever stitched you up did a good job." Tara had checked out Mac earlier.

"Chibs." Mac said absently, miming the cuts on each cheek with a syrup-covered knife. Tara grinned at her knowingly, but didn't say anything more.

They enjoyed breakfast, talking mostly about Tara's first few weeks at the hospital. Mac was happy that her friend clearly enjoyed the work. Tara was extremely intelligent, and she had all the makings of an excellent doctor. She was also happy that Tara had left Kohn behind. He'd really done a number on her.

—

Mac was a little surprised to see Tara's name pop up when her cell phone rang. It was a few days later, and she'd just gotten the kids on the bus home when it rang. As soon as Mac picked up, Tara started to speak quickly, incredibly worked up about something.

"Kenzie, oh god, you won't believe this." Tara said. "Jax's wife, well, sort of his ex-wife, was rushed in today OD'ed on smack. Tracks all over her hands and feet. But she was _pregnant._ Mac, with Jax's son! We had to do a C-section; the kid is ten weeks premature. He's got some serious birth defects as well, and his chance of survival isn't great. But Mac, Jax has a _child."_ Tara said all this without really taking a breath, but Mac caught the gist of it.

"Oh Tara, _Jesus_." Mac said, not really sure what else to say.

"I'm about to go into surgery on him; they've named him Abel." Tara continued. "It's gonna be touch and go. I spoke to Jax; told him all this. Mac, he wouldn't go see his son. It's his _son._ "

"Okay, Tara, deep breaths." Mac said. "Everyone has their own way of dealing with trauma. And you? Your way is healing. You're going to save that child. You're going to be the badass doctor that I know you are, and you are going to give that child a long and healthy life, no matter who his parents are. You've got this."

She heard Tara take a deep, steadying breath. Mac hoped she'd gotten through.

"You're right." Tara said. "This child deserves the life that it's junkie mother almost took from him. I gotta go. Surgery in a few minutes."

"Good luck, hun." Mac said.

"Thanks, Mac." Tara said. "And Kenzie? You really are a wonderful friend."

Mac smiled as she hung up.

But just as soon as she shut her phone, her prepaid rang next. Mac dug the phone out of her bag, checking the caller ID.

"Shit timing, Tommy." she said to herself, but flipped it open anyways.

"'Ello, old friend." she said, adopting a much thicker English accent than she normally had. Tommy liked it, and he was an important person to keep happy.

"Mackenzie." Tommy replied. He was an old and important contact, probably calling with a job.

"What can I do for you, Tommy?" Mac asked.

"A job. Tomorrow night. A little north of you. Quick, clean, snipe preferably." he said. Mac thought for a moment, and then agreed, on the stipulation that it was a night job. Tommy had no problem with that.

"Good money." he added. Mac sighed. It wasn't that she needed the money. But she said yes anyways. Keeping Tommy happy was worth it.

"Good girl." Tommy replied, and hung up.

Mac left for home soon after that, getting her stuff organized for the next day. She retrieved her rifles from the stash of weapons she had hidden in the house, and packed a small bag. Knowing Tara would be all night at the hospital, she set about making dinner for herself.

After dinner, she blasted classic rock as she did the dishes, or she would've heard Chibs come it. She had a clean plate in one hand and a towel in the other. As she turned away from the sink, she caught a glance of someone sitting at the table. Mac had her gun out before the plate hit the floor.

"Woah _woah_ lass." It was Chibs.

"Bloody _hell,_ Chibs." Mac groaned, her heart racing. "Give a girl some warning."

"Do ya always eat armed?" Chibs asked as Mac took a seat across from him.

"I almost blew your head off, you prick." Mac said. "Didn't hear you at all. Music was too loud."

She passed him a beer that he accepted gratefully.

"Classic rock, eh?" Chibs asked. Mac just nodded.

"Don't discount my music tastes yet, Chibs." she said. "I picked up a but of Celtic punk in Ireland and Scotland." He gave her a full smile.

"Had a few wild nights following some of the bands." Mac could've swore that jealousy briefly flashed in Chibs' eyes, but she blinked and it was gone. Mac decided to get down to it.

"Why're you here, Chibs?" she asked. Chibs' smiled dropped.

"Because bein' friends was a stupid idea." he said. "I like ya, probably more than I should. That… pulse that I feel when your near, I know ya feel it too. We could really be somethin', darlin'. Why no'?"

Mac's heart hurt. He was right, and she wanted to give him a better answer than before, but she thought if she did, he'd never look at her again.

"I'm dangerous." she said quietly.

"I _know_ tha'." Chibs said roughly.

"I'm a killer." She tried again.

"So am I, crazy girl." he said. Mac just sighed. "Ya said I don' understand." Chibs continued. "So help me to." He was pleading with her.

Mac was close to tears.

"I did something, Chibs." she said, hearing the wobble in her voice. "Something that, if you found out, it would make you walk away, not want to see me again, much less care for me."

Chibs was quiet.

"Mackenzie." he said. "How can ya say tha', knowin' what the Sons do? You've been privy to club matters, ya know we're no better than you are."

"Do you kill women or children?" Mac asked.

" _Jesus, no."_ Chibs said vehemently. Mac turned away.

"Then there's nothing more for you to say." she said.

It was quiet for a while.

"The firs' man I killed wasn' even a man." Chibs said eventually. "He was a boy. Could've been in the same school." He sighed. "I though' I was doin' the righ' thing, killin' for a cause I believed in. Still do, to a degree."

"Chibs, I… that doesn't change anything for me." Mac said. "So what if you a… a gangster or a thug or whatever the hell it is people call you. You're also a solider, a brawler, an outlaw. You have a moral core and you follow it. Damned if it doesn't line up with everyone else's. That's a form of honor that I respect. You're a good man. I had that once. Then I lost it." Mac stood up suddenly. "That's why you need to leave. There's nothing for you here. Just get out."

Chibs followed her up. "Tell me, ya stubborn woman." he said. "How did you lose it?"

"I can't." Mac said. They were both yelling now.

"Yes, you can." Chibs yelled.

"I don't want to relive it, I don't want to remember it, I want it _gone_ Chibs!" she yelled. "Don't you see? It will always be a part of me, so I can't. I can't possibly be worth it." Her voice got very small.

Chibs rested his palms flat on the table, breathing hard.

"Don' say that again." he said, voice low and tight. "You're worth it. Don' ever think otherwise. And I'm no' sure wha' I've done ta make ya think I'm any better."

Mac collapsed back into her chair, and Chibs joined her, taking her hands across the table.

"Please, Mackenzie, jus' trust me." he said, pleading. "I'm no' a safe bet for anyone, and ya might be the firs' woman to understand tha'. I promise ya, nothin' ya tell me is gonna make me walk out o' this house."

Mac could hear the sincerity in his voice. She wondered if it was possible her past wouldn't scare him away. What she had done weighed heavily on her. It always had. A secret never shared. It was breaking her, crushing her under the weight of it, under the weight of holding everyone at arms length because of it. Maybe she could tell Chibs, maybe he could share the burden. Maybe she could stop running.

"I met a man…" Mac began slowly and quietly. "In the military, while we were both overseas. He was brave, he was charismatic. He was part of one of my missions, and then he wasn't, so I thought, why not? It wasn't like it'd interfere with work. He knew damn well what I did for a living. So we dated for a while. Peter - that was his name - he said things, made promises, that I so naively believed, and then, well, how does this story always end? He used me."

Mac couldn't feel the tears on her face anymore.

"He told me the job was sanctioned." she said. "He was a couple ranks up, so there was no reason for me not to believe him. I went alone, he was working remotely. We were in some back country part of Greece; I remember how hot is was. He told me the target was two men, made up some fake horrific backstory for them. One was supposed to have long wavy hair, the other shoulder length straight hair. I remember thinking that Greek men must wear their hair longer than Americans. How stupid."

"The daughter was sitting down." Mac said, now almost whispering. "She was old enough that I couldn't tell the difference, when she was seated. She was facing away from me, as was her mother. I shot both, and only when I fell did I realize they weren't male at all. Peter'd set me up. I found out late that the girl was his daughter and the woman her mother. _I killed them._ A woman and a child. Helpless, innocent. I couldn't go to anyone, because their deaths weren't sanctioned, and Peter had me on tape."

"He terrorized me in the months following. Threatened to report me or hide me away somewhere where I'd never be found. He liked to play games, to force me through the motions of a healthy relationship and then spring me with stories of his… bullying. He forced himself on that woman, and I know that's not the first or last time that's happened. I used boredom as an excuse to leave the military. I tricked Peter into thinking I was over what had happened, as best I could anyways, and it just barely worked. I fled, made a new name for myself in contract killing, and I've been in hiding ever since."

"But it won't leave me, Chibs, and really it shouldn't. How is it right that I'm still alive and they're dead? How is it okay that I can ever experience happiness? _They were innocent._ The only vow I've ever taken seriously, broken. Of my free will."

Chibs was stunned. There were some cruel people out there, but Mac's ex reached a new level. He reached for Mac when he realized she had gone silent and was determinedly staring at anything but his face.

"Mackenzie." he said. "Sweet girl, it wasn' your fault." Chibs didn't really know what to say here. "He tricked ya. He's the bastard here. Ya were jus' doin' your job. He abused your trust. _He's_ the rat bastard, not you, and he'll die for what he's done. You're innocent."

"But I'm not!" Mac burst out. "I killed them, Chibs, and that's not something I can blame on anyone else."

There was silence for a few moments. Mac wondered if she'd finally scared him away. And then he started talking.

"I had a wife, in Belfast." he said quietly. "Have a wife, I suppose, but we haven't been tha' close for years. Had a daughter, too. Kerrianne. She was supposed to be ma' everythin'. She was, for a little, and she still is. I was supposed to take care of them, but I failed. Jimmy O'Phelan, well, he saw them and decided he wanted what I had. He took 'em from me, along with everythin' else I held dear. He left me with my scars and my kutte and nothin' else. I ran here, like a whipped dog."

"How could I leave them behind? Fi and I, we weren't doin' too well before, but how could I just abandon Kerrianne to that man? I can't, and I'm no' goin' ta. I will figh' for them. Don't think it'll ever be the same, we'll never be husband and wife again, but I least I can free them from O'Phelan. Please take stuff from us, darlin'." He made sure Mac was looking him in the eye. "They take and break wha' we hold most dear, sometimes for personal gain, sometimes just because they can. All ya can do is figh' it until ya can't anymore. Because if you don't, they win."

He stood up, dragging Mac with him, and kissed her. Mac's world tilted around her. It was chaste, at first, and then she was being pressed into the wall and she responded in full. He burned like fire, and her whole body tingled in response to his lips. Mac put a hand to his face and the other carded through his hair. His beard tickled her chin and his hair her forehead. His big hands held her waist, keeping her against the wall. He took control, invading her mouth, holding on to her like his life depended on it. He tongued along her mouth, asking for permission, and she eagerly granted it, giving him a pleased moan.

It was her own noise that brought her to her senses. Her eyes snapped open and she showed him away, catching him by surprise more than anything.

"How can you?" she yelled, breathing heavily and stunned that he would still want her after everything she'd told him.

"Because I know what it's like to fail yourself." Chibs said. "Now come back 'ere."

"No." Mac said, desperately trying to regain control of her facial muscles. She could hear the desire in his accent. "No, it clearly hasn't hit you what I've done. You should leave. It's only a matter of time before you want to." Mac adopted as cold of an air as she could.

Chibs face went hard.

"Fine." he said. "If tha's really what ya want, I'll leave. But you remember, Mackenzie, we're cut from the same cloth. And I should know, ya can't keep runnin' from everythin', keep denyin' yourself human connection. It's no way to live. Don't forge' tha'."

And he walked out the door.

Mac watched him out before collapsing on the couch. She had tried. She'd given him the complete truth, and while she felt like shit right now, underneath that was a layer of relief. Her secret was no longer locked up inside. It felt good to get it out. But that didn't excuse the fact that he _stayed._ Even after she told him. What did that make him? She'd done so much wrong, how could he still want her? She didn't think she'd ever find it in her to forgive herself, so how could Chibs? Was he right about everything? Mac shook her head quickly, shutting down that line of thinking. He just hadn't had time to think it through properly.

But a wife and a kid. It surprised her, sure, but she expected him to have had a good reason for leaving Ireland, and this was it. This Jimmy O'Phelan character, though, Mac immediately disliked him. She supposed she was a bit biased, but she could understand Chibs' hatred. Mac cleaned up the kitchen slowly, finishing up from dinner, cleaning up the pottery from the dropped plate. She though back to the intensity of the conversation she'd just had. He really did care about her, and honestly that hadn't been in doubt, but even after hearing about her past, he still didn't walk away.

 _Oh Chibs._ she thought, getting ready for bed. _How do I solve this problem?_ She was pretty sure she knew Chibs' solution. Mac sighed again. She was asleep in a minute.

—


	7. Chapter 6

Mac felt bad for skipping out on Tara. She'd left a note on the counter at home, but her friend needed her, and Mac was on a job. She was on her way back now; it'd been as easy as Tommy had said. Her phone rang as she neared Charming. The caller ID said it was Gemma.

"Hey Gemma, what's up? Mac answered.

"Hi sweetie." Gemma said, and immediately Mac could hear something was up, just by her voice.

"What happened?" Mac asked.

"Look, there's been an incident of some sort." Gemma said. "Jax, Chibs, and Clay are all on their way back to the clubhouse, but I got a call about gun shots and an explosion. I'm a little worried; I thought you'd want to know."

Mac stepped on the gas, laying rubbed as she responded. _Chibs._

"I'll be there in a half hour." Mac said, and hung up.

He had to be okay. He just had to, because he was right, in the grand scheme of things, he was right. It had occurred to her when she realized she was at Tommy's mercy for honesty about the backgrounds of her targets. She did her due diligence, and sometimes that included trusting other people. That was trust built over years and years, and when violated, it was just as much on the other person as it was on her. She felt stupid for not seeing it this way before. But just as Chibs couldn't be blamed for trusting Jimmy O', Mac couldn't be blamed for trusting Peter.

Chibs was right, in all the ways that mattered, and she had to tell him that. And now, with Gemma calling, things couldn't be good. She wouldn't've called if the guys were fine. She pressed harder on the gas, willing the truck faster. A hang around opened the gate for her and shut it behind her. Something had gone down or they would't've had the place locked up so tight. She pulled to a stop, tires squealing, and jumped out.

She saw Jax first.

"Where is he?" Mac asked breathlessly, running up to him. Jax seemed to know exactly who she was talking about, and pointed. Out from the garage came Chibs, looking beat up, but alive, whole, and grinning cheekily at her.

"Ya didn't think I'd go so easily, did ya now, darlin'?" he asked. Mac swore under her breath and didn't stop to think before throwing herself in his arms. He caught her under her ass, strong arms supporting her weight. They lips met sloppily, and Mac grabbed the sides of his face to help steady herself. Their tongues battled, and Mac felt heat sweep through her stronger than it had before.

When Chibs hear the squealing tires, he'd not thought it would be Mac, but there she was. She had a wild look in her eyes, a little bit of panic, but that washed away the moment he called out to her. When he saw her, he was reminded of their conversation the night before. _What's she doing here?_ he thought. Well, her throwing herself into his arms answered that question.

He caught her and she kissed him and he was forced to lock his knees to keep them upright. He realized now he'd been dealing with a more restrained Mac the night before, at least physically. She was C4, verifiable dynamite in his arms now. When she slipped her tongue in his mouth he briefly wondered if he could spontaneously combust from desire.

Somewhere deep in her mind, Mac started to hear wolf-whistling from outside of her and Chibs' bubble, but it wasn't until the rest of the brothers joined in that Mac pulled back slightly. All she could see were Chibs' eyes, brown, dark, and laden with desire - and something else.

Mac started to laugh then, first small chuckles but those slowly built to a full out laugh as she listened to the noise the rest of the Sons were making behind her. Chibs joined in, and Mac slowly slide down to her feet, breath hitching as she slid over his hard-on. Chibs' eyes darkened a little more. Mac leaned in again, this time with feet firmly on the ground, though the wolf-whistling kept this kiss slightly more restrained.

When she pulled back for the second time, Chibs hugged Mac to him.

"You were right." Mac whispered in his ear. "My trust was betrayed. I didn't set out to do what I did. That doesn't make it okay, but it's a step forward. I'd like you to be mine, now, please. My solider, brawler, and outlaw."

She pulled back, smiling, to look at Chibs, who looked about as proud and turned-on as one could be simultaneously.

"Are you two quite done?" Tig asked from behind them. Mac flipped him off as she turned around, still wrapped in Chibs' arms.

"Jealous?" Chibs asked him, wagging his eyebrows. Tig just made a face.

"Everyone's okay?" Mac asked, elbowing Chibs. Jax nodded.

"We've got church." Clay said, giving Gemma a kiss. She nodded at the guys, and walked back to the office.

Mac turned and gave Chibs a peck, which he quickly turned deeper. When Mac pulled away, he pretended to look hurt.

"Come back 'ere." Chibs said, grabbing for her. Mac smiled widely, staying out of reach.

"Call me, baby." she said as she walked away.

Tig elbowed Chibs, who couldn't take his eyes off Mac's ass. He was so… happy. And that wasn't a word he used very often. Happy that Mac had come round, happy that she'd done it on her own, happy that that had lead her to him. And _very_ happy to be watching her ass sway.

"Call her, baby." Tig said, and if looks could kill, Tig would be dead. But underneath, Chibs was grinning wildly. Mackenzie was his.

—

Mac opened the front door to Tara, who looked exhausted.

"Woah, Tara, what's up?" Mac said, immediately worried about her friend. "Is it Abel? He didn't…"

"No." Tara shook her head. "Abel's fine. Successful heart surgery today. He's a tough little guy."

"That's good, then, right?" Mac asked.

"Yes, but that's not what I'm worried about. Yesterday, I was the one to suggest moving up Abel's heart surgery, because he was doing so well. I met with Gemma to talk about it. The woman thinks I'm still living in the past."

Tara rubbed her lower back, and Mac knew was she was thinking.

"I don't think she wants be anywhere near Jax, and it makes her uncomfortable that I'm on Abel's case. She's a crazy old lady, Mac. And then today, I saw Jax after the surgery. He finally came in to see his son."

"And?" Mac questioned.

"And I don't know. We reconnected and talked, but what now?" Tara said.

"What do you want?" Mac asked.

"I… I think I want him, but Mac, their lives can't support a legitimate relationship. It's why I left in the first place. He wanted me to be his old lady; do you know what that means?"

"I have some idea." Mac said.

"It's not just the tattoo." Tara said. "You become as much a part of the club as they are. You don't do the dirty work, but that doesn't mean you aren't as guilty as they are. There guys aren't good people. I don't know that I can get involved with that again, and stay involved."

"They're not bad people, Tara." Mac said quietly. "They're outlaws. They live by their own moral code. So what? Haven't I done that my whole life? Did you grow up that way?"

Tara was silent. "That's not what I meant, Kenzie." she said. "You're different from them."

"No, I'm not." Mac said. "In some ways, I'm worse. Don't be so quick to judge them. Most of them; this is all they know, what they believe in. They're soldiers, and they'll fight for what they view as their family. There's more love here than in a lot of relationships. I wouldn't discount that so easily. They protect this town and their own. So what if they live in a gray area of the law? Don't we all? If you're gonna sentence all of the Sons to the category of bad people, you might as well do the same to me."

"I don't think you're a bad person." Tara said, joining Mac on the couch.

"You should." Mac said. "I killed in the military. And when I left, I killed for money. Bad people, sure, but that's still taking another human being's life. I killed for the Sons, too."

Tara was silent. She'd known this, but it had never been spoken aloud, so boldly.

"At least give the Sons a chance, Tara." Mac said.

"I will." Tara said quietly, and Mac took that to be a step forward.

—

The week was pretty uneventful after that. Chibs was with the club doing god-knows-what, but he'd gotten her number some how, and had been texting her.

 _Dear Miss Mackenzie. What do I have to do to get a bite of that apple?_

Mac had gotten that one during a staff meeting, and had to stifle a laugh. He'd turned her job into an innuendo; leave it to Chibs. Mostly they chatted about inane things, but Mac still missed him.

 _Hey, how do you feel about carnivals?_ The text came from Chibs on a Friday.

 _No opinion whatsoever._ Said Mac.

 _I'll pick you up tonight at 5. We're going to Fun Town._

So now Mac was sitting on a chair on the porch, booted feet up on the railing, sharpening one of her good knives. The rasp of steel was loud, but not enough to mask the rumble of the Harley as it rolled down the street.

Mac ignored Chibs as he parked his bike. He walked up to her, all swagger and cocky grin. Mac continued to sharpen her knife, and did such a good job ignoring Chibs that his touch on her knee almost surprised her.

"A lass with a knife." he said. "Anotha' wet dream."

Mac suppressed a grin, and set the whet strip down, fingering the blade of the knife. She let the sharp edge ever-so-slightly cut the pad of her thumb. Deeming it satisfactorily sharp, she set it down next to her, and met Chibs' eyes as she sucked the blood off her thumb in the dirtiest way she knew how.

Chibs' eyes went dark. He pulled her to her feet by her arms, and Mac's thumb slid out of her mouth with a pop.

 _Fuck me, this woman._ Chibs thought. She'd looked good just sitting there, but when she'd basically sucked off her thumb, he's lost part of his control. He kissed her, hard and controlling. He'd been willing to share control before, but apparently Mac had pushed too far. Good. Now that she was committed, she was in for the whole nine yards. She reveled in the fire, feeling the familiar tingles in it's wake.

He slid his hands down to her waist, pulling her towards him until they were pressed together as much as possible. Mac had two hands buried in his hair. Slowly, Chibs slid his hands down to her ass, encouraging her to hook a knee up, and Mac obliged. Mac, forcing herself to think through the haze, slowly realized where they were.

"Chibs." She was panting. Chibs' desire pushed him on. "Chibs, this is a residential neighborhood. Every kid and their mom is watching."

Chibs pulled back and gave her a dirty grin; hugging her around the waist and pulling her close.

"Wanna give 'em a show, darlin'?" he asked. Mac pretended to consider it. For a brief moment, it did sound like a good idea. But maybe not. Best not to do too much damage to her and Tara's reputations.

"Don't we have somewhere to be?" she asked. "Besides, I wanna go for a ride." The innuendo was accidental. Chibs picked up on it, and but for Mac's hand on his chest, reminding him that they couldn't do this right now, they'd've been naked in record time. As it was, he took a deep breath, and Mac slipped away, stashing her stuff in side and grabbing a bag.

Chibs was frozen where she'd left him. _Firs', she kisses the livin' daylights outta me. Then, she says she wants ta go for a ride. Doesn't she know wha' tha' does to a man? Now I gotta ride with that body pressed up from behind? Is she bloody kidding me?_

"Ya know Mackenzie, I have dreams involving you and that bike." His voice was a drawl, and he stopped her before she could walk down the steps, crowding her into the wall of the house.

"Say somethin' like tha' again, and we won' ever leave the house. I promise ya that." he said. Mac just laughed lightly and nipped at his earlobe.

"How about I promise you one of those dreams later?" Mac whispered. Chibs' self control stretched even farther, and it took all of him not to jump her. But her promise was too good. Besides, Gemma would kill him if they were late. Chibs sighed, pressing his arousal into her once more, letting her know just how hard it was for him to pull away.

"I'll hold ya to tha', lass." he said. "Let's go."

At his bike, Chibs gestured for her to climb on, handing her a helmet.

"Ladies first." he said.

Mac narrowed her eyes. "You just wanna watch me straddle the damn bike." she said. Chibs just smiled. It was true. So Mac gave him the show he was looking for, than looked back at him, waiting for his turn.

Chibs grabbed her hand first, pressing a kiss to the palm. Mac went warm at the show of affection.

"Been a long time since I've had a woman on my bike." he said. "Would't've wanted it to be anyone but you, darlin'."

Mac smiled at him and watched appreciatively as Chibs swung his ass onto the bike. As it roared to life, Mac instinctively wrapped her arms around his waist. She made sure to plaster herself to his back, and didn't bother to hold in a whoop as they took off. Something about hanging on to Chibs as they sped down the street made her heart feel huge.

—

They pulled into a grass parking lot beside a bunch of other motorcycles. Chibs had barely turned off the bike before he and his helmet were off, and he was unbuckling Mac's. Then his lips were on hers and her mind went blank. Chibs didn't let it go on too long - his restraint was at a breaking point and there were kids around. When he pulled back, Mac looked bemused.

"Sorry darlin', but ya were plastered to me the whole way." he said, giving Mac a grin.

"No complaints." Mac returned it. "You just keep givin' me ideas for my promise." She hopped off the bike and walked towards the carnival. Chibs stood quite still for a few moments, before running to catch up with her and grabbing her hand.

"You'll be the death of me, woman." he growled in her ear.

They walked up to a group of Sons, accompanied by old ladies and children. Tig noticed them first.

"Well well well, don't you two look cozy." Tig said. Chibs tightened his grip on Mac's hand.

"Most of you know Mackenzie." he said. "We're together."

There was a brief silence.

"You damn well better be, after that show you put on the other night." Tig said, and the group laughed. "Come on, let's go have some fun." Mac smiled. She was happy. It honestly seemed like the group had accepted her. Chibs kissed her head, noticing her happiness, and Mac felt a warmth fill her chest.

—

The day passed pleasantly enough. They played games, ate junk food, drank beer. Teased a clown, who was stupid enough to call the guys "leather wearing butt-buddies" and to call Mac a whore. Mac had helped the guys dunk him again and again.

Later, as the sun was setting, Mac was hanging with Gemma as the guys were dealing with club business. Chibs had muttered something unintelligible about the "bloody micks" and followed the guys when they had called for him.

"How are you, Mackenzie?" Gemma asked. "How's Chibs?"

"He's good." Mac responded, not really knowing what to say. "We're together. It's only been a couple of day though, so I'm not really sure of anything."

Gemma smiled. "Don't worry, sweetie. The Scot has it bad for you. All you have to do it watch his face. Some goes for you. Your eyes give you away."

Mac blushed.

"Do you know what it means to be an old lady?" Gemma asked. Mac shrugged.

"Pretty much." she said.

"Well, the club'll be your family." Gemma said. "I assume you can get behind that."

Mac nodded.

"But you're still a long way off, aren't you?" Gemma asked. Mac shrugged again, not really sure what to say. She was saved by a touch on her back. She jumped slightly before realizing it was Chibs.

"What is it?" he asked quietly. Mac had taken off her jacket, so the tattoo on the middle of her back was visible.

"Mission number." she returned quietly. "For the one I can't forget." Chibs nodded. Before either could say anything else, there was a commotion from across the field. Mac took off towards it, hearing the fear in the yells.

It was a young girl, bloody and bruised, with torn clothing. Mac's first response was to vomit, but she pushed that down, dialing 911 and passing her phone to Chibs. The girl was being carried by a woman and a man who must be her parents. Mac pointed to the ground.

"Tristen, my god, my baby." The woman was practically unintelligible.

"This is our daughter." the man said, setting the girl down in front of Mac. "She's only thirteen, for god's sake." The man was in shock, but communicative. The crowd that had gathered passed her a blanket, and she covered the girl. Chibs passed her phone back to Mac, who listened to an operator ask her what the patient's condition was. The girl's pulse was there, and she seemed to be knocked out from a good hit to the face.

For a while, Mac sat by the girl, watching as the Sons kept the crowd back. It wasn't until the paramedics had taken over that the reality of the situation started to hit her. She started to shake, and felt Chibs put his arm around her. She tried to reel herself back from the edge of a meltdown, but it wasn't working. She stood up, backed slowly away, slipping out of Chibs' grasp. When she could, she turned and ran.

"Mackenzie, luv, wait!" Mac heard Chibs call for her, but didn't stop.

"Mackenzie!" Mac knew he wasn't going to let her run run away, so she stopped behind a building, sliding down the brick wall when she thought her legs wouldn't support her anymore. Chibs was at her side in a second.

"Sweethear', what's wrong?" he asked.

Mac tried to swallow the lump in her throat, but failed. She couldn't speak, couldn't really breath. She pressed her hands to her face in an effort to stop the crying, but it didn't work. The tears escaped, falling from under her hands. She sobbed until the lump felt small enough that she trusted herself to speak.

"I'm sorry." Mac said, her voice ragged.

"It's okay, luv." Chibs said. "Don't apologize." He'd held her through her crying jag. "What's wrong, Mackenzie?"

"That number on my back is a promise, Chibs." she said. "To avenge every other woman and child Peter hurt in his miserable life. That girl? That poor girl, she's gonna have to live with this experience for the rest of her life. How many people did Peter do that to? How many innocent women, Chibs?"

Chibs had no answer.

"We're gonna catch this bastard, Mackenzie." he said. "He'll get his."

They were silent for a while. Mac felt slightly better knowing the Sons were gonna at least try to find the guy. Eventually, Chibs took her face in his hands.

"My sweet, lovely Mackenzie." he said. "What has the world done to us?" Mac looked up, gasping a little at the total tenderness in his face. It was an out-of-place look on her badass biker, and she loved it. She gave him a light kiss and burrowed into his arms. They sat for a while, until they heard the last of the EMS vehicles pull out. Mac felt Chibs' fingers under her chin, pulling her in for a kiss. It was soft and tender, and Mac could feel his beard tickling her slightly. When he pulled away, Mac was stunned to find tears that weren't her own on her cheeks. Chibs leaned their foreheads together.

"My real name is Filip." he said. "Filip Telford."

Mac was a little shocked by the non-sequitur, but pulled back and gave him a smile, biting her lip. Chibs' eyes focused on that. _Come here and let me do that for you._

"Well I knew it couldn't be Chibs, babe." she said, giggling. He grinned back.

"Thank you." she said, giving him a kiss. Before she could pull away, he'd taken control. _Come to me, sweet girl._ He pushed her back against the brick wall, kissing her deeply. This time, it was less teasing, and more of a promise of things to come.

"I'd take ya right here if I didn't think everyone would catch us." he growled. "I'm the only one who gets ta see ya like tha'." Mac licked her lips at the image, eyes darkening. _I'll do that for you too, lovely one._ Chibs pulled her to him.

"Careful, Chibs, we might set the building on fire." Mac said. The heat coiled in her stomach would certainly do the job. He breathed deeply, closing his eyes, clearly attempting to control himself.

"I gotta job ta do for the club, or I'd say we should give it a try." he said, regret clear in his voice. "I'll be in contact if ya need me. Use the prepaid number." Mac nodded. "Bi sàbhailte agus a bhith spaideil, a leannan."

Mac didn't understand the Gaelic, but she thought she mostly got the message. She kissed him once, quickly.

"Keep talking like that and you're not going anywhere." she said. She reached a hand down, grabbing him through his jeans. His hands against the wall turned into fists.

" _Mackenzie._ " he said lowly. His control was hanging by a thread. She took pity on him and dropped her hand, slipping out from the cage his arms made and grinning.

"Ya pushin' me, darlin'." he said, turning so his back was against the wall. Mac looked him up and down slowly, bit her lip, and… turned around and walked away. She made sure there was a particular swing in her step. She grinned widely at the audible groan behind her, and what very much sounded like a first hitting a jean-covered leg pretty hard.

"Bidh tu a 'bhàis orm, boireannach." he said. This time, she definitely understood.

—


	8. Chapter 7

AN: This is another tease, but I think the next chapter more than earns it's rating. Enjoy!

Tara was sitting on the couch when Mac walked in. She'd just gotten a call from Chibs, who'd been pretty radio silent for a few days, saying they'd gotten the rapist. That was all he'd had time for, besides to say he'd be gone for at least another few days. So Mac decided to have a wine night, and seeing Tara splayed out on the couch was the perfect beginning.

"Wine." she said to Tara, leaving no room for argument. Her friend just nodded.

"Kohn's back." Tara said tonelessly. "And I might still be in love with Jax." Mac almost choked on her wine.

"Well you've got a better reason than I do to be drinking." Mac said. "I just want Chibs back so we can fuck until next week."

"Lucky bitch." Tara said.

"Hey, from what I see Jax wouldn't be so opposed to the idea."

They poured themselves some wine and got on with it.

"Kohn left me flower petals on my car." Tara said.

"Creep."

"Sometimes I'm honestly not sure if I'm worried more by him or by Gemma." Tara continued.

"Well, Kohn I can protect you from." said Mac. "But I'm a little scared of Gemma." Tara snorted into her glass.

"Abel pulled through, and Jax and I had a _moment._ Then today, Gemma offers me a handgun with the serial number filed off _for my protection._ First Jax then Gemma. And then Kohn gives photos of Jax and some blonde having sex." Tara said all this in a rush.

"So you've got an ex-boyfriend stalker, and ex-boyfriend who might not be an ex, and a crazy mother." Mac summed it up. "Well first of all, carry that gun with you. I'm serious about Kohn. If he ever comes near you, call me and then Jax. Remind Kohn about the restraining order, and if he still keeps coming, shoot him. Now, tell me about Jax."

Tara did a grimace. "I honestly don't know what to say." she said. "He has a newborn son, his mother is a nightmare, he's got more girls after him than an A-list celebrity… how do I fit in?"

"Well for starters, I don't think he ever stopped loving you. Or you him." Mac said. She was being honest. If watching Jax and Tara together over the past few weeks had told her anything, it was that the two still had serious feelings for one another.

"Gemma is over-protective and overwhelming. That being said, she's protecting her family, which is her job. You broke Jax's heart. You may not know it, but I can see it. That's an automatic tally mark against you when it comes to Gemma. I think it's gonna take some time for that wound to heal. I'd give it time with her, focus more on Jax. But you have to be sure, Tara. You left him and the club once. If you do it again, hurt him again, no one's going to forgive you."

They were quiet for a while.

"You're right." Tara said. Mac rolled her eyes. "No really, you are. I've been afraid of Gemma since day one. And I know I hurt Jax, but I had to! I had to leave the club. You can understand that, right? I thought I'd escaped my feelings for Jax, but I guess I was wrong. But Mac, if there's a way, any way he and I can make it work, I'd try. Despite the club."

"But you can't think like that." Mac said. "It can't be "despite the club." You'd be an old lady. You'd be part of the club. It comes with Jax; that's what Gemma has been trying to say. You've reconciled yourself with what I do; now you have to do it for the club. If you want to make it work with Jax, you have to do it for him. The club can't be this thing on the periphery that you try to ignore. It's his family, and yours if you're honest."

Tara sighed. "I know." she said. "The club comes with him. It's been that way always. I know the rules, I know what it is to be an old lady, hell I've even got the tattoo. I just need time."

"And so does Gemma." Mac said. "And Jax too, I would imagine, what with his newborn child."

"What about the blonde?" Tara asked quietly.

"She's a crow eater, Tara." Mac said. "A sweet butt. You know it doesn't mean anything. You also know that there's no reason for Jax not to sleep with someone else. It isn't like you're back together yet."

Tara sighed again. "I know. I know. You're the best, you know? Keeping my head on straight." Mac just smiled at her.

"What about you?" Tara said. "Why're you drinking tonight?"

"Missing Chibs." Mac said.

Tara hummed. "You know." she said. "How did he turn you around? From what I last heard, you were dead set against getting involved for reasons of your own. Then all of a sudden you two are together."

Mac grimaced. "It's a long story." she said.

"We've got plenty of time." said Tara. Mac regarded her friend carefully. Something had shifted in a moment that belonged completely to Chibs. Telling the story the second time might be easier. And Tara was her best friend. She deserved that.

"What I'm about to say doesn't leave this room." Mac said. "It's you, me, Peter, and Chibs that know the whole story. And I'll understand if, after I'm done, you never want to speak to me again."

Tara started to look worried. But Mac stopped her questions by jumping into the story. Her friend, bless her, reacted perfectly. It was amazing to Mac that Tara could so easily accept Mac and all of her flaws but take so much offense when it came to the Sons. Mac found she didn't cry the second time through. She told Tara everything about Peter and his daughter. About the terror she'd endured. And Tara just held her through it all.

"That monster." Tara whispered. "How can a human being be so cruel?"

"I don't know." Mac said. "But it was Chibs who put my head on straight. Telling me that if someone takes advantage of my trust, it isn't my fault. It took me a little, but I'm there now. I thought he was crazy at first, for not running away when I told him the story. I killed a woman and her child. That's not innocent, Tara."

"The man is just as much a killer as you are, Mac." Tara said. "And you're intent wasn't malicious towards innocent people. You're a good person. You have love in your heart and a strong moral center. You're loyal and kind and you're as good a friend to me as anyone has ever been. You're beautiful and funny and yes, you're dangerous and you have a bumpy past and skeletons in your closet, but who doesn't? It's no fucking wonder Chibs cares for you as he does!"

Mac swiped at fresh tears. She gave Tara a hug.

"You've given me the best gift, Tara." she said. "You really are the best friend I could ever ask for. No one else knows me like you do."

"Except maybe Chibs." Tara teased, pulling back. Mac rolled her eyes in spite of herself.

"What happened to that girl from the carnival?" Tara asked.

"Oh." Mac said. "The Sons caught him and killed him. Clay sent her dad the balls."

Tara burst into laugher. "Every now and then those guys do it right."

—

It was the end of another Friday, and Mac was just finishing up at school. She had been slightly keyed up the past couple of days, not having heard from Chibs for a while. Then, almost as if he had read her mind, her phone buzzed.

 _Sorry about the silence. Gemma's got that fundraiser tonight, can we meet there? The prospect will come and get ya around 5:30._

Mac broke into a grin. He was back.

 _No worries. See you tonight._ She sent back.

A few hours later, she was dressed and waiting for Half-Sack. He pulled up in a pick up not unlike her own.

"Hey Sack!" Mac called.

"Hi Mac!" he called back. They'd developed an easy back and forth in the time that Mac had been in Charming. Mac genuinely liked the kid.

"What's new, prospect?" she asked.

They made small talk most of the way to the fundraiser. Half-Sack mentioned that the guys were training him to fight, piquing Mac's curiosity. She'd done her fair share of scrapping.

"How good are you?" she asked.

He shrugged. "I'm small, but that means fast. I can throw a fair punch. Why?" he asked.

"I trained like that. I could come help train." she said.

Half-Sack looked at her out of the corner of his eye. "I don't think Chibs would like that very much." he said.

Mac narrowed her eyes. The prospect was right. Chibs probably wouldn't like her training the prospect. She suspected he didn't want her involved in club business at all. Well, that ship had sailed. She'd done much worse for them than training a kid to fight.

"He's seen worse." Mac said. "When do you train next?"

He shrugged. "One of these mornings. Things have been crazy for a little while. Just come over when the guys roll out of bed. Follow Chibs." He leered at her as she climbed out of the truck. Mac just rolled her eyes.

"You guys all have your minds in the gutter." she said, slamming the door.

"Can't blame us, darlin'." said a familiar Scottish brogue. "How are we suppos'ta stop with lassies like you runnin' around?"

 _Chibs. Oh, you're a sight for sore eyes._ She ran to him and kissed him with everything she had. He consumed her; their separating playing clearly in the strength of the kiss. His hands ran everywhere, as if they couldn't decide where to stop.

 _Come here, pretty girl._ Mac looked as good as ever, climbing out of the prospect's truck. He called to her, feeling desire run through him just from seeing her. _I've been gone too long._ And when she kissed him, he only confirmed the truth of that thought.

They could've stayed like that for hours, but a slow clapping brought them both back to earth. Chibs pulled back slowly, nipping at Mac's lower lips, and she pouted at him when he pulled back completely. Then she turned, and noticed that the person clapping was Tara.

"What're you doing here?" Mac asked her. Tara hadn't been at home when she'd left.

"Supporting the community." Tara said, but Mac saw right through that. Jax would be around here somewhere. "Quite a greeting." Tara said with a grin. Mac rolled her eyes.

"Aye, though I could make it better." Chibs said, making a swipe for Mac.

"Ah ah, we're here to support the community." she said.

Chibs narrowed his eyes. "Mackenzie." he said, voice low enough that Tara didn't hear. _I need you._ His thought came through clear in the way he said her name. _Oh yes,_ thought Mac, _yes please._

She would've given in, had it not been for Gemma.

"Mac!" Gemma called, walking towards them. A look of pure frustration crossed Chibs face, and this time, Mac felt it too. She sighed, and turned towards Gemma.

"Hey!" she said.

"I'm so glad you're here." said the biker queen, looping an arm through Mac's, who was forced to wave goodbye to Chibs as she was dragged away. "I need all the help I can get."

—

Gemma kept her busy up through the end of dinner. Mac grew more and more frustrated as the day wore on, and she knew Chibs was feeling the same way, but he was occupied with club stuff. Eventually, he made an appearance. _Jesus, he looks edible._ He was leaning against a tree just outside of the food tent. Staring at her. Mac flushed when she met his eyes. Tara noticed as well, nudging Mac.

"I'll cover you." she said, and Mac gave her a grateful smile before turning back to Chibs. He jerked his head, motioning for her to meet him behind a nearby bathroom. Mac went straight there. Chibs met her there, and didn't waste any time, pushing her up against the wall, invading her personal space, and latching on to her neck. Mac whimpered. _Do that again, lovely girl, and see what happens._ Chibs couldn't get enough of that noise. He was teasing, and he knew it, but he wouldn't kiss her on the mouth, and Mac started to squirm, frustrated.

She whispered to him, practically begging for him to just kiss her, and let her hands run under his kutte, through his hair, and when she grew so bold, over his dick, hard in his jeans. _You're testing me, Mackenzie._ When it didn't get he what she wanted, she planted her hands on his chest and shoved, hard. He shifted back just enough, and she grabbed his kutte and reversed their positions. She kissed him, full on, and could feel his smile under her lips. _Bastard._

"Filip." she said breathlessly. "We need to find a less public place, _now_."

Chibs nodded. _Finally._ And then shook his head. _Oh no, what now?_

"I agree wholeheartedly, darlin'." he said. "But club business."

Mac groaned. "Which absolute _asshole_ do I have to kill to get you to myself?" she growled, frustrated beyond belief.

"In this case, he deserves it." Chibs said darkly, and Mac sighed, realizing that whatever it was was important.

"Go." she said, backing away from him. "When you're free, come to my place. Tara has a night shift, so we'll be along. I'll wait up for you."

Chibs nodded, eyes darkening with desire. Mac blew him a kiss.

"I'll be waiting." she said, and walked away to find the prospect for a ride home.

—


	9. Chapter 8

AN: It's gets a lil' saucy. You've been warned. Enjoy! :)

Chibs couldn't focus. He was on board with the plan, but wasn't integral to it, so he had nothing to focus on besides Mac. Just waiting for him at her house. His dick twitched just thinking of her. He cursed Kyle's stupidity for the umpteenth time, and followed the group into he garage. At least this'd be over soon.

Chibs wasn't sure what he would choose, given the choice of fire or knife. Both looked unpleasant. There are some smells that never leave you, though, and one of those is burning flesh. He stood, trying not to breath through his nose. Chibs was unsympathetic, knowing what Kyle had done to deserve this, but that didn't mean that watching it was pleasant. He willed Tig to work faster. His girl was waiting for him, and he wanted nothing more than to go and have his way with her. Or let her have his way with him. Chibs wasn't picky

—

There was a movie on TV, but Mac had seen it before, and her mind was occupied by other things. Every time she heard a noise, she tricked herself into thinking it was Chibs' bike, and looked out the window. Every time she was disappointed. The anticipation was heavy in her lower stomach. She'd poured herself a glass of wine when she'd gotten home, but it wasn't doing much to make the time go faster.

—

Chibs pulled into Mac's driveway at last. He'd escaped as soon as was reasonable from the club - not without some heckling - and showered before riding over. He took off his helmet, running his hand through his wayward black hair, and looked up at the front door. There was Mackenzie, looking like something out of a dream. _I hope she's ready, because once we get started, we're not stopping for anything._ Chibs didn't hesitate before heading up the steps.

She watched as Chibs parked his bike, noting the predatory look on his face when he saw her. She was wearing a SAMCRO shirt that was much to big for her and cut up the sides over a lacy underwear set that had been her only concession to seduction. She knew they didn't need it. Mac opened the screen door as Chibs crossed the threshold, having just enough sense to kick the door closed behind him. He crowded into Mac's space, backing her up against the nearest wall.

"You." he growled, cupping her face. "I have'na been able to think straight since I left ya. Been walkin' around half hand."

His accent was thicker and rougher than normal and Mac felt a bolt of lust at his words. He kissed her then, hard and possessive, until she could breath properly. Only then did he move away from her mouth, trailing down her neck, covering the places that her shirt didn't.

 _Jesus, she tastes like blueberries. How can she taste like blueberry pie?_ He shoved her bra up, discarding the shirt completely, and Mac moaned delightedly when his lips wrapped around a nipple. _Oh, let's get you to make that noise again, lovely._

Mac could feel her knees weakening. It's a good thing she was pressed against the wall. Her head was thrown back, fingers tugging on Chibs' hair, breathing hard. His lips left trails of fire, and she gasped as he nipped at her chest, then soothed the brief pain with a sweep of his tongue. He played with her tits for a while, until Mac pushed through the haze in her head to tug on his hair, pulling him up to her lips. Then, in a relatively smooth move, she grabbed his kutte and reversed their positions.

He pushed back, trying to stop her. "Minx." he growled, but had to freeze when her hand slipped down, grabbing at him over his jeans. She repeated his actions, biting at his neck and working his kutte off. She paused for a second, reaching over to hang it on the coat rack by the door. He was wearing a black t-shirt underneath, and she had that off in the next few seconds. She let her hands splay out on his chest. It was muscular, tattoo-covered, and he was giving off heat like a space heater.

Chibs sucked in a breath when Mac tweaked at his nipples. Her hands were warm on his skin as they trailed down to scrabble at his belt buckle. She followed their trail with her lips, leaving tingling paths down his chest, lingering at his tattoos. He reached to help her, but she slapped his hands away. Chibs grinned at his girl. Mac got it figured out eventually, and had his jeans off in short order, sinking to her knees in front of him. _Jesus Mary._ He groaned as a wave of heat ran through him at the thought of her mouth on him.

The groan deepened when she read his mind, mouthing him over his boxers, giving him a grin. Chibs let his hands slip in to her hair, his head falling back. Mac teased him for a little through his boxers, until he was cursing her under his breath. Eventually she took pity on him, and pulled them down.

There he was in all his glory. He was thick and weeping in front of her, and when she breathed on him, his hands tightened in her hair. She kept up the teasing for a while, just using the tip of her tongue and breathing. "Bloody hell, Mackenzie." he groaned, and she decided to take pity on him.

Chibs was melting, or at least that's what it felt like. He was burning from the inside out, and Mac's teasing wasn't helping at all. He couldn't think straight, though he could hear himself when he spoke. And then she took him into her mouth, as far as she could, and his head snapped forward. There was his fantasy, Mac grinning around his dick as she sucked him off, green eyes glowing up at him, curly hair messed to hell. _Oh sweet god._

Mac had him right where she wanted him. With careful skill, she reduced her big badass biker to a moaning pile of mush. She would back off a little, grinning when he inevitably cursed her out for teasing him.

Chibs' mind was hazy. He couldn't think straight and wasn't sure he wanted to. At a particularly loud curse, he heard Mac laugh around his dick, and that was what pierced the veil around his mind. The heat in his stomach was nearing a tipping point, and this was not how he wanted this to happen for the first time. He tightened his hands in Mac's hair, and pulled her back. She let his dick fall from her mouth with an obscene pop, and Chibs groaned again. He pulled her up quickly, throwing her over his shoulder and slapping her ass, still in her underwear.

He walked quickly into the bedroom, Mac laughing over his shoulder, grabbing at his own ass. He left his clothes in the doorway, not even stopping to care. He let her fall on the bed, still giggling, and was unable to stop the smile that spread over his face at his Mackenzie, flushed, aroused, and smiling at him, spread out like a buffet on her bed.

Mac felt her smile turn from laughter to come hither. Chibs' eyes darkened more - Mac honestly hadn't thought that was possible - and he crawled over her, pulling her panties down and running his hand over her pussy.

"Oi, Mackenzie." he growled. "So wet for me." He pushed two fingers inside her, and Mac moaned, the smiling slipping completely, her eyes falling shut. As he moved them slowly, her hips started to cant; it wasn't going to take long to slip over the edge, and she wanted to come with him.

"Chibs, _oh god, right there._ " he disrupted her plans by crawling down and sucking on her clit. She didn't have the heart to stop him, and she let the coil tighten and tighten until she flew, screaming his name, over the edge. Her body went rigid, and Chibs grinned, guiding her through the orgasm.

"Filip." she sighed, when she'd regained some of her faculties. "Chibs, _please._ "

"Wha', darlin'?" he asked. "Tell me."

"Please, Chibs, I want you inside me, _please._ " Mac said, allowing herself to beg.

He reared up, hard as a rock, ready to go, but Mac stopped him.

"Wait, Chibs, I'm on the pill, but do we need a condom?" Chibs had briefly mentioned getting tested at the carnival, in one of his attempts to get her to leave early, but Mac hadn't heard the results.

"I'm clean, darlin'." he said, and she smiled wide.

"Then what are we waiting for?" she asked.

He lined them up, teasing her with his tip until she was begging again, and then he was inside her, completely and all at once. Mac screamed and Chibs wasn't quiet either. She was a vice, and burning hot.

"Mother of _Christ,_ Mackenzie." he said, starting to slide in and out, delighting in Mac's noises - mostly whimpers by then, mixed with the occasional curse word, and his names.

It wasn't slow, it wasn't lazy, it was fast, hard, passionate. Chibs didn't think he would've stopped with a gun to his head, and Mac just kept begging _faster, faster_.

Her teasing earlier had put him close to the edge, He reached down with his thumb, forcing her closer, and Mac's noises increased in volume.

"Let go, lovely girl." Chibs said.

She was tightening around him, the coil tightening in her stomach until one, two, three and she was gone, over the edge again. He followed her quickly, spasming in her and going rigid above her.

They came down slowly, Chibs shifting off to the side. As their breathing slowed, Mac started to giggle.

"Wha'?" Chibs asked, grinning at her.

"We'll have to try again." she said. "Nothing spontaneously combusted." Chibs laughed, a real belly laugh, and rolled back on top of her.

"I don' see you complainin' about tha'." he said, and it was Mac's turn to laugh.

"I have nothing to complain about." she said, and laughed again, letting herself be swept away.

—

Mac blinked against the bright light coming through the window. She was sprawled across a warm, solid body, with two arms wrapped around her and legs tangled with hers. The other sleeping form was Chibs, she realized, with a pleasant tingling as she remembered the several times they'd failed to ignore each other long enough to fall asleep.

Mac grinned. She was sore in all the right places. She thought is was probably around 10am, but didn't see any reason to get moving yet. Mac looked at Chibs; he was, like most people, younger and more peaceful in sleep. His dark eyes were closed, lashes resting on his cheeks. He had the beginnings of smile lines and crows feet in his weathered skin. His beard was trimmed to just off his chin, and he's shaved recently, evidenced by the 5 o'clock shadow he sported.

Mac's eyes skimmed down to his chest, defined thanks to years of club and mechanic work. She brushed over his tattoos, recognizing a couple of SOA symbols. She traced the bill on his chest, letting her fingers sweep up to move over his features, aware she was probably tickling him. When she ran a hand through his hair, he stirred and open his eyes, arms tightening around hers.

"Madainn mhath, darlin'." he said, voice gravelly. "Good morning." he translated.

"Madainn mhath." Mac said back, doing her best with the new language. Chibs smiled at her attempt and pulled her to him, kissing her lightly. His hands moved, and Mac recognized the moment he realized she was naked as the day she was born, because all of a sudden the kiss was a lot less light. Just as Mac responded, though, Chibs' phone rang.

"Bloody fuck. Wha' the hell is it now?" Chibs grumbled, releasing Mac slightly as he grabbed for his phone.

"Aye." he said tersely, answering the call.

Mac couldn't hear the other end of the conversation, and she really wasn't much interest in it, having just discovered that she had been freed enough to reach down and grab Chibs' dick.

"Those bloody right-wing nut jo- _Jesus_!" Chibs had noticed Mac's newfound interest. Mac looked up when he didn't say anything else, and the look on his face made her stomach tighten considerably. His eyes were darkened with desire, bottom lip trapped under his teeth, with a slight snarl on his face. Mac just raised an eyebrow, grinned, and continued what she was going.

"Wha'?" Oh. Sorry. Got distracted." The other person on the line had kept talking. Mac ignored Chibs' conversation and moved down with her mouth, raking over Chibs' stomach and hips with her nails, but refusing to mouth him until she reached her final goal. Chibs laced a hand through her hair, pulling threateningly, but Mac ignored it.

"Mmhmm… yeah he's a dumb…" Chibs kept trailing off, unable to focus. Mac decided to speed up the conversation. She made eye contact with Chibs and licked him like a lollipop, from base to tip, before taking him in her mouth. Chibs let out a moan laced with surprise, despite the fact that he'd been watching her. His eyes fluttered shut, the hand in her hair relaxing. Nothing in him wanted to stop her now.

The person on the line, however, had something to say.

"Are you seriously fuckin' while we're on the phone?" It was Tig, Mac could here him now.

"Mmm… yeah Tiggy I'm sure you've done it ta me as we - _Holy god._ " Mac had done something lovely with her tongue.

"You wanna keep on the line?" Tig asked, now more interested than angry.

"I'll be there in an hour, creep." Chibs said, and hung up. His eyes opened and he looked at Mac.

"You _are_ trouble, lovely girl." he said, burr deepened with desire. He laced the other hand through her hair to join his first. Mac smiled around his dick, reaching a hand down to play with him balls.

He groaned heavily, head tipping back to thunk against the headboard. Mac continued, using her hands and her mouth until he was tense and writhing.

" _God,_ Mackenzie, I wanna…" but he trailed off, unable to finish. Mac got the message, releasing him with a pout.

"Aye?" she asked, imitating him. He smiled, quick and dirty, and suddenly reached down and dragged her up his body.

"Minx." he muttered, petting down her chest, stopping to tweak her nipples, before reaching her pussy. Mac moaned delightedly when he thumbed her clit. He played with her for a little while, first with one, two, then three fingers, until she was a whimpering mess. The coil of heat in Mac's stomach wrapped tighter and tighter until just before she flew over the edge. He stopped just in time.

" _Bastard._ " Mac cursed at him, hitting his chest lightly and grinding down on his crotch, trying to find the friction to finish herself off. That cut off Chibs' chuckle, as he felt it too. The smile slid off his face, and a snarl creased his face. Patience gone, he picked her up, impaling her in one strong thrust.

"Oh _god._ " Mac said, throwing her head back.

"Chibs is fine, luv." he teased, unrepentant. Mac breathed out a laugh.

"Oldest joke in the book, _Filip._ " she said, breathing hard.

"Ya don' seem ta mind, now do ye?" Mac laughed again before kissing him to shut him up.

They fucked slowly for a while, Chibs helping her up and down slowly, allowing both of them to feel every inch of them movement. He was driving her crazy, always on edge but never over. Finally, when she couldn't take another minute of it, she reached down behind her and grabbed his balls.

It was enough. Chibs sat up straight, moving within Mac, who let out a whimper when he hit her in just the right spot.

"Had enough of a tease, eh?" Chibs asked, picking up the pace. Mac couldn't form words for an answer, only trying to spur him on, scratching his back so hard it stung. The coil was tightening, and soon it would snap. Chibs knew she was close.

"Le' go luv." he whispered in her ear. "I'm righ' with ya." And together they flew over the edge. Mac couldn't remember clearly, but she thought she probably screamed loud enough to wake the neighbors, and only later had the sense to be thankful that Tara was still at the hospital.

They lay together a while, Mac splayed out on top of Chibs, their hearts still hammering.

"You're bloody dynamite, luv." Chibs eventually said. Mac hummed a pleased response.

"And to think, we've only just gotten started." she said, fingertips trailing down his chest.

Chibs' hands tightened her back.

"Bloody Nazis." he muttered. "I'd give a lo' ta stay here all day, ya know tha' sweetheart?"

Mac hummed again, ignoring the Nazi comment. Club business.

"I do have ta go, darlin'." He coaxed Mac off him slowly, and she snuggled back under the covers, still wrapped in his scent and warmth.

Chibs showered and dressed as Mac dozed. As he pulled on his kutte, she sat up, letting the covers fall. Chibs' eyes went dark again.

"If anythin' were ever gonna keep me away from the club…" he said, walking swiftly over to her and capturing her mouth. Mac responded, wrapping her arms around his neck. Eventually she slowly pulled away.

"Go to your brothers, Chibs." she said. "I'll be around."

"Call if you need anythin', all right?" he said, and she nodded. With one last searing kiss, he was gone.

—

An hour and a half later, Tara stormed in the door. Chibs was long gone, and Mac had gone for a run, had a shower, and was having a cup of coffee.

"Tara, what's wrong?" Mac asked, concerned at the slightly crazed look on her friends face.

"Kohn cornered me again." Tara said, deadpan. Mac went a little cold. "He's investigating SAMCRO. He knows something about them or maybe he's just pissed at Jax but he's on their trail now."

Mac went to het and grabbed both her hands.

"Hey. It's gonna be okay Tara." she said. "The guys can take care of themselves, and if Kohn needs dealing with, you have me as well."

Tara didn't seem to believe her. Mac sighed.

"Look, he's your version of Peter." Mac said. "I'm not going to let another bad guy fuck up our lives."

Tara sighed. "I know that, I do." she said. "Between you and the guys, and the gun from Gemma, I should be okay. I know how to use it now." Tara looked at her bag, as if the offending weapon was going to jump out and bite her.

Mac laughed. "You went shooting with the queen biker?" she asked. Her aim was to make Tara smile. It worked.

"Yeah." said Tara. "And trust me, I'm sufficiently terrified so as not to piss her off again. Now, I'm going to get some rest. We're still monitoring Abel and I'd like to go check on him later."

Mac watched as her friend tiredly walked toward her room, thinking that she definitely had an ulterior motive for Abel's care besides just the conscience of a good doctor. Mac grinned to herself. Jax was a good man - hopefully he and Tara could figure their shit out.

—


	10. Chapter 9

A couple days later, Mac was hanging out in the clubhouse, waiting for Chibs and Gemma. She was sitting on a table, feet up on a stack of tires, shooting the shit with Tig and Happy. Or rather, Tig was teasing her about Chibs.

"I mean, the two of you could make a porno." Tig was saying. "It'd be an excellent amateur." Mac was thinking that if she rolled her eyes any farther back in her head, they'd get stuck. Happy was laughing his ass off on the other side of the car.

"Tig." Mac said. "Keep dreaming."

The three of them - her, Tig, and Happy - had become pretty good friends since Mac had arrived in Charming. Tig was slightly afraid of her, and Happy respected her. They both made her laugh and didn't give a damn about her job or her past. It worked. Mac sat on the table lost in thought as the boys continue to harass one another.

"Mac." Tig said. No response. "MAC." he said again, this time louder. Mac jumped.

"Sorry, lost in thought." she said. "What?"

"I was just asking, how much would you give Happy here to do karaoke?"

Mac rather thought she would ask Happy to do that the day she wanted to die. She shook her head at Tig. "What in the fuck, Tig?" she asked. "I guess something. It would be pretty funny. How much would you guys give me?"

"Depends on what song." Happy said.

"And the costume." Tig leered. "What you got?"

Mac grinned. "A lot more than you. I used to lip-sync to songs in shitty army bars. Not karaoke, but it was enough for the army dudes." Tig and Happy looked slightly stunned. Mac grinned.

She did wonder if it had been a good idea to tell them, but she quickly forgot about it as Chibs came into the garage and made a beeline for her. Mac took her feet of the stack of tires and gave him her best come hither look. He followed directions, walking right up between her legs and kissing her. Mac wrapped her legs around his thighs, and enjoyed the hello.

"What're you doin' here, luv?" Chibs asked once he'd pulled away.

"Waiting for you, and for Gemma." Mac responded. "I had a half day, and she invited me to lunch."

Chibs nodded.

"Club business today?" Mac asked, and he nodded again.

"An' I go'a get back to it. Jus' wanted to come an' say hi." he kissed her again, and didn't stop until someone cleared their throat behind him.

It was Gemma.

"Hey guys." she said with a grin.

"Hey Gemma." Mac said, releasing Chibs. "How are ya?"

"Hey angel." Chibs said, diving the matriarch a kiss on the cheek.

"I'll see ya later, luv." he said to Mac, brushing her cheek with his thumb and giving her a crooked grin before walking back into the clubhouse.

"I'm good sweetie." Gemma said. "Listen, I gotta take care of some club business before we eat, that alright?" Mac nodded, and off they went.

The club business turned out to be at Caracara, which was, as Mac quickly came to understand, a porn studio. It made sense to make money in an honest way for the Sons, and Mac should've expected it to be something like porn. They made too much for it all to be covered by the chop shop. Porn was a good cover. Plus Mac could see some other _perks_ in it for the guys.

While Gemma sat and talking with Luann, who Mac recognized from dinner, Mac perused the art on the walls. Some of it was nudity for the sake of nudity. Eye-catching, meant to sell the video, not the artwork itself. But some of it was nudity for the sake of art. Strategic coverings, themes that weren't just a cover, good photography. Mac shrugged to herself. Someone in the business had good taste.

"Mackenzie!" Gemma motioned here over, standing up. "We're done here. Ready to go?" Mac nodded, said her goodbyes to Luann, and joined Gemma in the car.

They ate at a diner on the edge of town. Mac got the feeling that Gemma was being more cautious than normal. But she shook it off as the matriarch started to talk.

"So." Gemma began. "You and Chibs?"

Mac grinned. Gemma didn't waste any time.

"You're a fast worker, huh?" Mac said. Gemma just grinned right back.

Mac shrugged.

"It was a rocky start, but I'm happy." she said. "It's not anything too serious, though. Companionship, mostly."

Gemma eyed her suspiciously.

"Clay tells me you have a past."

Mac nodded.

"One that you won't fully share with the club?"

It was true. Mac hadn't shared all of the details with anyone but Chibs, and he'd kept her secrets.

"Chibs knows." Mac said. "He'd tell the guys if he thought it'd make any difference. Probably I'll tell them eventually. But not right now."

Gemma nodded.

"Well, in any case Clay trusts you and Chibs enough to not press." she said. "I'm a little less trusting, but I think you've earned some of it. What you've done for the club isn't easily forgotten, and I have the feeling that it isn't going to be the last time you'll be useful."

Mac stayed quiet.

"You be good to Chibs, though, you hear me? And you make sure he's good to you. That man has be lonely for too damn long. You might not know why-"

"I do." Mac interrupted. "He told me about Belfast."

"Good." said Gemma. "Well then you know that he doesn't deserve much more sadness than he's already had to endure."

Mac nodded.

"And about your… occupation." Gemma continued. "Clay's told me the broad outline. I'm assuming Chibs knows all the details."

"All the guys do." Mac said. "I gave an outline of my past at church."

Mac wasn't surprised that Clay had told Gemma some details. She was his Old Lady after all, and they were privy to club business.

"Alright, good." Gemma said. It seemed that Mac had passed the test.

Their conversation was interrupted by the waitress coming over and asking for their order. Once she'd left, Gemma hopped right back in.

"So." she began again. "Tell me about Tara."

"What do you want to know?" Mac said. "I met her in college, we were really good friends. We kept in contact for a while, then lost it for a while, then came back to it when I left the military. She and I planned a move to Charming together. I know what she's told me of her and Jax' history, though I'm not sure she's told me everything. She's my best friend."

"Look, Mac, I'll be honest." Gemma said. "I don't love the girl, and I don't think she's right for Jax. She left him. She doesn't want to be a part of the club."

"Well, maybe she didn't." Mac said. "But she's not the same person she was when she left Charming for the first time. We've talked about it a little, about what it means to be an Old Lady, about how the guys live by their own moral code. But at the end of the day, she's my best friend, and I'm hers. That means something. She knows my entire history; _all_ of it. The good, the bad, and the worse. She accepts me and my moral code despite all of the bad that I've done. I'm thinking that this is going to change the way she views the guys and the club, if it hasn't already."

Gemma sat in thought.

"I see." she finally said. "Look, I won't pretend like I want the girl with Jax. But you might be a better influence than I could've predicted."

"Can you agree to wait and see?" Mac asked. "She's not doing any harm. I don't know where Jax' feelings reside, but Tara's still undecided. It's not like they're getting married tomorrow. Plus she's Abel's doctor, and however you may feel about her, she's doing a spectacular job looking after that boy."

Gemma nodded at that.

"Alright doll, you've got it. We'll wait and see."

Mac just nodded in return, shocked that the biker queen had agreed so readily to leaving Tara be. Well, for the time being, at least.

—

The next few days were silent. Chibs had told Mac briefly that the club was scraping money together for something, but she didn't press for details. If it was important, Chibs would make sure she was listening. Mostly it meant that she couldn't see Chibs. This also meant that Tara couldn't see Jax. And so, lonely and looking for company in one another, the two went out to dinner.

When they got back, they noticed the Harley in the driveway before anything else.

Tara parked her car, and the two women rushed inside, hoping that everything was alright. It was Jax; Mac could tell from the bike.

"Hey girls." Jax greeted them, urgency in his voice. "Look, we've had an accident and I need what medical supplies you have. Chibs sent a list. One of our friends was shot, uh, in the ass."

If Jax hadn't looked so serious, Mac would've laughed. As it was, this was clearly a bad situation. Tara scanned the list, nodding.

"I can give you what I have in my medical kit." she said. "I'm not sure that I can get anything else. Saint Thomas does inventory."

Jax nodded. "Whatever you have is good." he said.

Tara retrieved the supplies, and Jax took them with a kiss. When he was gone, Tara turned to find Mac looking at her.

She shrugged. "One day at a time Mac." Mac gave her a wry grin in return. Then, as if in slow motion, she sees Tara's face collapse first to surprise and then terror. Mac's friend's gaze went beyond hey then, but before she could turn around to see what the problem was, she heard the click of a gun barrel in her ear.

"Into the bedroom now." Kohn said. "Nice and slowly."

 _"Don't make any sudden moves." says Peter. Mac is stuff beside him, with her arms wrapped protectively around herself._

"Now!" said Kohn, and Mac started slightly before following his orders. Tara went behind her. The threesome entered Tara's bedroom.

At gunpoint, Kohn had Tara close and lock the door, before handing Tara a roll of duct tape.

"Tape her up." he said, gesturing to Mac.

 _"Do I have to tie you up, Mackie?" Peter asks, managing to be both derisive and sexual. Mac just stands at the foot of the bed, refusing to meet his eye._

Tara lead Mac to the heavy chair in the corner of the room, and taped her arms down to the arm rests.

"Mouth as well." Kohn said.

 _"How about a gag?" Peter asks, mocking Mac._

When Kohn was satisfied with Mac's bonds, he lead Tara to the bed. He was talking but Mac wasn't really listening. She was caught up in her mind, as if Kohn were Peter and she were Tara and it was years ago and Peter still had her firmly within his grasp and wasn't letting go. He was holding her down, telling her she was all his and she cannot ever leave. _I know what you've done._ Mac panicked then, and started to hyperventilate.

Strangely enough, it was the spots that start to appear in her vision that wake her up. She came back to herself enough to shove her head between her legs and try to calm her breathing. When she could start to hear again, she listened to Tara acquiescing and trying to calm Kohn down, to her saying that they can be together again. Mac watches her play along as they start to have sex, but she can also see the revulsion and fear on her face, and hear the catch in her voice.

Kohn made a rookie mistake when he used duct tape, but then again, he was a man distracted by obsession. Mac's wrists were slippery with sweat, and with just the right amount of pressure at the right angle… _yes._

She was free.

Mac peeled the tape off of her mouth, taking stock of the situation. Kohn was still pointing the gun at Tara, but he was starting to get too involved with his desire, and the grip is slowly, _slowly,_ slackening. Mac catches Tara's eye and nods.

It happens quickly. Tara knees Kohn in the balls just as Mac jumps out of the chair, ripping the gun out of Kohn's hands, pointing it at him. Kohn reaches for Tara's throat, but he's too slow, dulled by pain, and Tara punches him hard, right in the nose.

 _Nice._ thinks Mac. Kohn flies backwards, baring his stomach and chest to Mac, who doesn't hesitate to shoot. He falls, dying, halfway between the bathroom and the bedroom. There's a moment of stillness.

Then Mac realizes that she and Tara are both shaking violently. Tara scrabbles for her cell phone.

"G-g-gonna c-call Jax." she said, shivering like its freezing in the house. Mac just nods numbly. She stares at the body on the floor. In quick succession, it turns into a little girl with dark hair and then her mother.

 _I know what you did._

Mac doesn't think before dropping the gun and fleeing the house.

"Mac?" Tara calls after her, but Mac doesn't hear. "Mac!"

But she doesn't listen. She just grabs her cell, her keys, hops in her truck, and lays rubber out of Charming.

Jax picks up on the third ring.

"What's up?" he asks.

"K-k-kohn came and he attacked me and Mac shot him and now he's dead and bleeding on my bathroom floor and there's a gun with Mac's fingerprints on my bedroom floor and Mac just ran and oh _god_ Jax help!" Tara says all this in a rush, but Jax gets the gist of it.

He swears violently.

"I'm on my way." he says, and hangs up.

Jax is in church with the guys, Cameron Hayes splayed out face down with Chibs trying to dig a bullet out of his ass.

"I gotta go." Jax tells the room at large. "Tara's ex attacked Tara and Mac."

Now it's Chibs' turn to swear. He's got to deal with Cameron, so he's not going anywhere.

"Jackie boy, take care of Mackenzie!" he calls to Jax. "Let me know that everthin' is okay. I'll come as soon as I can!"

"Will do brother." Jax says, giving Chibs a thump on the back, which translates to Cameron's ass, making him groan in pain.

Jax leaves, and Chibs continues to curse under his breath. He knows full well that Mac can handle herself, but what he wouldn't give to not have to deal with the _bloody Mick_ right now.

—

Mac is driving entirely too fast for safety, much less legality. She drives and rives, only stopping once for a six pack and to fill her tank. The look the cashier gives her let's her know she's got crazy eyes. Not that she cares.

Eventually she makes it to a high point about 20 miles outside of Charming. Mac knows she's been driving in circles, and decides to just stop. She parks at the highest place she can find and climbs into the bed of her pickup with the six pack.

She doesn't hear her cell phone ring again and again.

—

"Mac's not here, Chibs." Jax says. He tells the Scot neither he nor Tara have any idea where Mac went, and then hangs up. He and Tara have more important business to get too.

Chibs tells the rest of the guys that Mac is gone. He continues to try to save Cameron's life, all the while worrying about her.

—

Mac's lost in memory, laying in the bed of her pickup. The incident with Kohn had caused stronger flashbacks than she'd had in a long time. Flashbacks of the time after she'd committed Peter's murders for him, when she'd thought he'd owned her, when he could've ended her career or her life had he wanted to.

Times when she didn't belong to herself.

 _I know what you did._

It's morning before Mac realizes she fell asleep. Or passed out. The six empty beers make it hard to figure out. It's noon-ish, Mac figures, by the sun. She's not really sure, but it's pretty high in the sky.

She's not better. She can still feel the rough edges of herself abrading the healthy edges. She climbs back into the cab, and notices that her phone has gone slightly crazy with missed calls and messages. It appears that Chibs had been looking for her all night and this morning. What catches her eye, though, is a message from Tig, sent through Tara.

 _Bring G. I. Jane to clubhouse ASAP._

Mac curses. The guys want her for a job. She leaves her little campsite almost regretfully. She needed more time to heal, but that's apparently not something she can have right now. She feels slightly guilty for running away without telling anyone, but there's nothing she can do about it right now.

Mac drives much slower back than she did out.

—

At the clubhouse, no one seems to be around. Inside, she meets Tig, Clay, and Opie. Cameron is gone, but bloodstains mark his past presence.

"Hey guys." Mac says, and even she can hear the flatness in her own voice. She sees Tig, Clay, and Opie notice. Something in the way they look at her changes. Maybe it's wariness.

"Mac." Clay greets her. Tig gives her a fist bump. Opie nods at her. "Everything okay? Hear about your incident with the good doctor and her ex."

"Fine." Mac says curtly. "What can G. I. Jane do for you?"

"We got a deal with the Irish." Clay starts. "Tara's med supplies were for a man named Cameron Hayes, who was shot while we were making a transfer. His boss was killed by port commissioner Brenan Hefner. Understandably, Cameron's not happy. We cut a new deal with him and the Irish, one that includes Hefner's death. Can you take care of it?"

Mac wonders if Clay is really giving her a choice. She brushes off the idea. Even she can hear the cynicism in her voice.

She nods. "It'll be done by tomorrow." she says, and leaves without saying anything else. Mac can practically feel the guys look at each other.

She makes a beeline for the bar, and the guys follow except for Opie, who meets his wife and leads her outside. Tig lines up a couple of shots for each of the three of them, and Mac tries to convince herself that hard alcohol will help. It doesn't.

She doesn't want to be sick, recognizing that she hasn't eaten in too long. So she nods to Clay and Tig once more, and leaves. On the way out, she catches the tail end of an argument between Opie and Donna, and hangs back, not wanting to interrupt.

From the sound of it, Donna is not happy that Opie is getting involved in the club again. Mac knows that Opie went to jail for five years, taking the fall while the guys made a fair amount of money. Donna has a fair right not to be happy, but that doesn't mean she has to judge the club morally.

Maybe it's the alcohol, but Mac decides to go talk to the woman.

Mac walks up behind her as Donna watches Opie walk away.

"Being an Old Lady is harder." Mac says, and Donna jumps before turning around.

"It is." Mac says, shrugging like she's just being honest. "You shoulder the same risk he does. Could be charged as an accomplice. And you take care of the kids, the house, the bills. It might seem like he has more fun." Mac shrugs again.

"Speaking from experience, Donna, he doesn't."

Donna doesn't respect her. Mac can see it in her gaze.

"I know your history." Donna says quietly.

"No you don't." Mac challenges. She very well might, of course, Opie might've told her. But Donna's blush tells her otherwise.

"My history would make you think less of me than you already do." Mac says. "If you think what the club does is morally reprehensible, well, you ain't seen nothin' yet. I make some of 'em look like fuckin' teddy bears."

Donna starts to look slightly scared.

"We've all got our own moral codes, Donna." Mac continues. "Hell, the law in this country is based off the moral codes of a bunch of strangers. Who knows if they're right? Maybe they have it backwards, and we're all just following. Like sheep." Mac smiles a little.

"I dunno. But what I do know, is you married that man. And whether you did it despite of or because of his moral code, you did it. It's not fair to him, to his family, to his brothers, to your kids, or to you to back out now. Not because you don't like his moral code. If he was beating you, it'd be one thing. If he was beating the kids, it'd be another. But I don't think that's the case. Is that the case?"

Donna shook her head, the fear and disrespect receding from her eyes. _Hmm._ Mac thinks. _Maybe it's actually working._

"No. Didn't think so. Opie's not like that. He's a good guy with a good heart, and he's part of a club based on brotherhood and love. Now, maybe they've taken a few skids off the road. But that doesn't mean you should give up on it. Hell, I think that's when you should work the hardest, and I think Opie thinks so too. Trust in the man you married. He's not going to do anything he doesn't want to do. He's a brother. That's what prospects are for." Mac smiles slightly again.

"If you wanna know what he's doing, ask. I'm sure he'll be thrilled. If you don't, then don't ask, but don't take it out on him by thinking he's keeping a secret. That was _your decision._ Have your moral code, Donna, but respect that he has his too. And also, always remember that the club is family. If you're there for them, they'll be there for you." Mac shrugged.

"Just some friendly advice from your neighborhood killer."

And she walked away.

—

There's a man leaning against her truck, and Mac doesn't need to notice that he's long and lean to figure out it's Chibs. She feels guilt, hot in her stomach. She'd ignored his calls in favor of her panic party. _Shit._

"Mackenzie." he says as she approaches, and she gets warm for a different reason. Chibs looks _excellent._ It's a warm day, so he's only wearing a wifebeater under his kutte, and blue jeans. His hair is a little wild, and his dark eyes are focused completely on her.

"Chibs." Mac said. "I-" But before she can even start her apology, he's taken her in his arms and Mac feel instantaneously better. Why hadn't she just gone to him? She would've if she'd remembered this is how he made her feel. She sighs into his embrace, relaxing for the first time since the night before.

"I'm so sorry Chibs." she said into his shoulder. His arms are warm and strong.

"For what, luv?" he asks, seeming genuinely confused.

"I ran." Mac said, pulling back to look him in the eye. "I dunno what Jax has told you, but Kohn cornered Tara and I at home, and I shot him and I just… I couldn't stop thinking of Peter. So I ran. I only realized that I'd gone completely MIA when Tara texted me with a message from Tig."

Chibs shook his head. "You don't have anythin' to apologize for, sweethear'." he said. "I was worried about ya, but ya know how ta handle yourself well enough."

Mac stayed in his embrace, relieved. They stood like that for a while, just holding on to one another, until Chibs suggested they go back to his place.

"I thought you lived in the Clubhouse." said Mac.

"Aye, I have a room. But I need my own space too." Chibs smiled. "Come on, luv. Let's go."

They ride over in Mac's truck, Chibs giving her directions as they drive. His home was on the outskirts of Charming, in a small house, almost like a cottage. Mac instantly likes it. Two floors, basement, and an attic. Chibs tells her the attic is haunted, but Mac thinks it's just Scottish superstition.

 _His bedroom._ Mac thinks upon walking inside. It's nice, decorated with dark blues and greens and dark wood. There's an Irish and a Scottish flag and of course some Sons decorations. Mac takes a couple minutes to look at the photos of him and his brothers, some from SAMCRO, others from SAMBEL. There are a few photos of a young Chibs, handsome and rebellious in his army uniform, young and smiling with a girl that Mac doesn't recognize.

"My sister, Cait." Chibs says, pointing at the girl. "And my mum." He points at a lovely looking woman hugging the two children.

What Mac is most surprised with is the window seat, bookended with tall shelves, packed with books. She looks at Chibs curiously.

"Wha'?" he asks, kind of defensively. "I gotta fill the time somehow." Mac just smiles, and gives him a kiss.

Its clean and well-kept. Clearly his place to retreat. There's a back yard, and Chibs grumbled when Mac teased him about his gardening skills. There's even a little terrace connected to Chibs' bedroom, which Mac loves. They go down to the first floor, which is mostly studio and filled with light.

"You have a home, Filip." Mac said, using his given name.

"It's no' much." he said, shrugging.

Mac shook her head. "It's lovely."

"Com'ere." Chibs said, making a grab for her and pressing her back against one of the cabinets in the kitchen. He kissed her with fire, as always, but also with something incredibly sweet. There's more than lust there, also affection. They didn't break it off for a while, content to just revel in each other. But eventually Mac's stomach interrupts them. It's been a while since she's eaten anything. Chibs chuckles.

"Com'on." he says. "I'll make up some supper." Mac is dubious, but Chibs assures her that her knows how to cook.

"Had to learn something, didn't I?" he said. "Couldn't survive on microwave dinners forever." Mac just grins, and lets him hand her a beer.

Chibs makes steak. Steak and mashed potatoes and green beans. Mac gets conscripted into helping with the beans. She's almost shocked that Chibs has fresh vegetables in his house, but the whole _house_ has been so shocking that she thinks she's immune.

They eat as the sun sets, and as promised, Chibs can cook.

"I think," Mac says, "that we should come to your place more often."

"As long as I cook, eh?" Chibs teases, but he looks occupied.

It takes a few minutes, but eventually he says what's on his mind.

"Is this a date, luv?" he question sits there, and Mac knows she wants the answer to be yes. She wasn't surprised by her gut instinct. Maybe the first thing that drew her to Chibs was lust, but there was always something else there. There's an underlying affection. They have fun together. The protect each other, now each other's secrets, and worry about one another. Yes, this was a date.

"Yes." Mac says simply, and Chibs smiles huge. Mac loves his dimples, and they're only made more obvious by the scars on his cheeks. Mac smiles back.

"I haven't dated anyone since Peter." Mac says. Chibs shrugs.

"I haven't dated anyone since I was married." he says. Mac sits quietly, thinking.

"You're still married." she says eventually. It's a problem that she hasn't really considered. Chibs never got divorced. In effect, Mac's the other woman.

"Only in name, luv." Chibs says. Mac stays quiet.

"Mackenzie, I'm not in love with her anymore." he says. Mac looks up.

"But?" she says, knowing it's coming.

"She's the mother o' my child. I love Kerrianne. She will always be my daughter, no matter the obstacles between us."

Mac instantly feels guilty. "Oh god, Chibs, of course you love her. That's not what I meant. I just want to make sure that I'm not the other woman. That, if Fiona ever comes back into your life, I won't ever be the other woman. I _like_ you Chibs, and it's been years since I've liked anyone. If I'll always be the other woman, tell me now, when it would hurt less."

Chibs reaches out and takes her hand. "You are _not_ the other woman." he says. "Fiona will always be important to me; she's the mother of my child. But our marriage is done."

Mac is, once again, relieved.

They did the dishes together. They were quiet, but the tension was building. It'd been a while since they'd been together, and they were both desperate for it. It was a little game, how much they could touch one another before they snapped. Light brushes as they passed dishes around. Mac could feel her skin heating up. When Chibs reached around her to put a dish in a cabinet, she could feel his arousal pressed into her back. She stiffened. He stood behind her, one hand trailing up and down her back, as she placed the last of the dishes in the drying rack.

"Mackenzie." he said quietly, his breath tickling her ear. And Mac snapped. She turned, flinging herself into his arms, and he caught her.

"Bedroom." she said, breathlessly, and he shifted her higher, trusting herself to cling to him as he climbed the stairs. She touched and kisses everywhere she could, trying to crack the self control that seemed to surround him like a shell. She wanted him tonight, all of him, nothing held back because he was afraid of scaring her or hurting her or whatever he was afraid of.

When he stopped beside the bed, she slid down his body, stopping to unbuckle his belt and jeans before stripping him off all his clothing. When he was fully naked, she told him to lie back. The bed had the perfect headboard for what she had planned. Mac picked up his belt and told him to slide his arms through the bars of the headboard, checking when she did that he was okay with this. The desire in his eyes gave her her answer.

The minx had tied him to his bed. Granted, he'd let her, but still. Chibs didn't think he'd been this hard… maybe ever. And she was still fully clothed. _Damn._ Why hadn't he rectified that before she'd tied him. It didn't matter though, because she started to strip - slowly - and his train of thought derailed. It was torture, watching her tease at the button on her jeans, at the edge of her t-shirt, at the little bow on her panties. It took her _lifetimes_ to get herself naked, and Chibs was growling by the time she was done. Mac just grinned.

He watched as she climbed over him, sitting her butt on his knees, well below his dick. She sat there for a while, as if thinking, until one hand slowly moved over her chest. She started to play with herself, first around her nipples, and then tweaking them. When she started to whimper, Chibs shifted under her, frustration building. Mac tickled down her own belly, leaving one hand up on her tits, until she reached her pussy. She used two fingers to stroke, purposely not touching where she wanted too most. Chibs could feel his cock twitch in time to her breaths. He was losing it.

When Mac finally brushed over her clit, she whimpered again, louder and filled with desire. Chibs let out a groan that came from deep inside, and Mac grinned. He was getting there. She played with herself, pushing a couple fingers inside. When she pulled them out and brought them up for a taste, Chibs started to pull at the bonds.

"Mackenzie, let me out." he growled. Mac just grinned. He could get out; the belt wasn't nearly enough to keep him down, but he was playing along. _Minx, bloody tease._

She continued to ignore his dick in favor of herself, now working herself towards the edge. She went too far, however, and had to lean forward, nails digging into Chibs' thigh, forcing herself to stop. She wanted to come with him. In the process, she panted onto his dick, hair just brushing the tip, and Chibs' control snapped. Mac was on her back with him inside her before she could take a breath. She laughed delightedly.

Chibs was gone. When she'd breathed on his dick, hair brushing it lightly, he'd lost his self-control. Tossing fears of hurting Mac to the wind, he'd ripped his hands out of the belt and flipped her over, entering her in one swift movement. Then he'd reveled in her laugh. _His girl._

It was hard and fast and passionate and Mac was flying with every stroke. She couldn't tell if she'd gone over the edge or was still approaching. She was so hot she thought she'd melt and then she was shaking uncontrollably and Chibs pushed into her once, twice more before coming. Mac was still spasming, the world going spotty around her.

Chibs lay above her, stroking her belly, braced on his elbows so as not to crush her. She hadn't passed out, those lovely green eyes were still slightly open, blinking as she twitched.

"Get's better every time, Filip." she mumbled.

"Aye." he said, kissing her before rolling onto his back and bringing her to his side. Mac laid there, recovering and basking in his warmth. _My Filip._ she thought briefly, before drifting asleep.

—

The port commissioner lived in a shithole, Mac decided. She was camped outside his apartment, waiting for an opportunity to do her job. She'd dropped Chibs off at TM earlier, and somehow picked up Happy along the way.

"You work slow." Happy was saying, much to Mac's annoyance. She appreciated the company, but he could shut up.

"We're waiting for him to leave. Now shut it." she said. "I'm _careful._ Stay home next time."

Happy just grinned at her. They were in a nondescript car, fake plates, just waiting. Tig was waiting for them at a chop yard and he would take care of the car once they were done with it. Mac had made sure the Sons were gonna cover their tracks on this one.

They say quietly for a couple minutes; Hefner readying to leave his apartment. Mac watched through the windows as he put on his jacket. She rolled down the window just enough for the barrel of the gun, and prepared to take her shot. He gave her the perfect opportunity; walking out the door, turning around to close it, and Mac shot him through the head before he ever had the chance to lock it.

Happy was driving before Mac had fully rolled the window up.

"Nice." was all he said.

"Thanks for driving." Mac said. "You got me outta here a lot faster than I could've." They didn't speak again on the way to the chop yard. When they got there, Tig was waiting for them as promised.

"Nothin' on the radio yet." he said almost immediately. "The gun you got is pretty quiet."

"Or no one else lived in that shithole." Mac said, happy that nothing had gone out over police radio yet. No one had found Hefner.

"Work your magic, Tig." Mac said, as she and Happy moved their stuff into Mac's truck.

Mac leaned against the body of the truck, watching as Tig took a tire iron to the car, thinking. She morally dealt with her job by killing bad people. People she vetted as bad and worthy of death. She was judge, jury, and executioner. Most people couldn't live with that mindset, but Mac didn't really worry about most people. The port commissioner was bothering her, however, because despite the fact that Hefner himself was a killer, there was something different about this job.

It made Mac's skin crawl, this one, and there wasn't one good reason for that. She slowly came out of her bubble, noticing that Tig was pretty much done with the car. Mac and Happy waiting in Mac's truck while Tig parked the car with all the other dead ones in the lot.

Mac's phone buzzed then, with a message from Chibs.

 _Just letting you know that I'll be out of contact for the night. See you tomorrow?_

Mac smiled. It was nice to have a man want to see her again.

 _You bet. Be safe._

She sent back, and put the phone away.

"Boys." she said, turning to her two passengers. "I wanna get a tattoo."

Tig grinned and Happy shrugged.

"Then what're we waiting for?" said Tig. "Let's go."

—

The shop Tig directed her to was surprisingly nice. Or, at least clean.

"Why not my place?" Happy asked.

"You really want girlie here gettin' some disease." Tig said. "I know that shithole you get your work done in. Why don't ya try somewhere clean for a change."

Mac grinned, parking the truck. Everyone piled out and walked into the shop, Tig and Happy still teasing each other a little. The girl manning the desk has piercings that made even Happy blanch, but she greeted them with a smile. Thankfully, the shop did small-time walk-ins, and what Mac had in mind was something small. She'd decided on a four-leave clover. Just an outline, in black, very simple. It was her discomfort with the job she'd just done that made her want to remember it. Because she hadn't known the port commissioner that well, she'd stuck with the idea that the death had been retribution for the Irish, thus the four-leaf clover.

"Just you then?" the girl asked, and Mac started to nod until Happy stepped forward.

"Me too." he said. "Just another for the collection." He picked up his shirt and showed the girl the patch of smiley faces on his tummy. Mac looked at him, her question on her face.

Happy just shrugged, as if to say _later_. Mac thought she understood, though. He'd been there, been complicit, and Happy liked to mark every death, not just some, like Mac, who had marked her first, and ones involved in the fiasco with Peter, and now this one.

"Alright, then." the girl said, and she walked Mac and Happy through waivers and payment. Tig came back with them when the girl walked them to their chairs. The shop was empty except for them, the girl, and their artist.

"Rick." he greeted them, shaking their hands. "Who's first?"

Happy volunteered, and he sat stoic through it, with no problem. By the way Tig was teasing him, it became apparent that Happy hadn't gotten a tattoo sober for a while. Tattoos didn't hurt, not really, at least not at the small size they were working at. Mac imagined there were places where tattoos hurt worse than a bullet, and sizes at which the burning eventually became too much. But she and Happy were okay.

"Your turn." Rick said, motioning to the chair he'd just wiped down. Mac was happy to see that. At least the shop was clean. She'd chosen the back of her arm, just above her elbow, as the placement, though Tig certainly did his best to persuade her.

"C'mon, you don't wanna get it a bit lower?" he was saying. "Maybe on a more _sensitive_ body part than your arm?" Mac just grinned at him.

"You angling for a show, Tig?" she asked, knowing very well that he was.

"Hold your arm still, please." Rick said, getting started.

But Tig wasn't done. "Always, darlin'." he said, and Mac tried not to laugh for the sake of her arm. She could feel the needle now. It wasn't going to take very long.

"I dunno." Mac said, pretending to be torn. "But for Chibs holding me back." Tig winced.

"Screw it." he said.

"Yes sir." Mac replied, and Tig and Happy laughed. Mac thought she even saw Rick crack a smile.

Rick was done quickly. He washed the excess ink off, rubbed on something that soothed the sting, and covered the area. Mac and Happy were freshly inked and ready to go. They thanked Rick and the girl again, and walked out of the shop.

"Where to now?" Tig asked as they got into Mac's truck.

"Well that depends." Mac said. "Is Chucky cooking?" Tig nodded.

"I think so." he said. Mac smiled.

"Wanna have dinner?" she asked.

"You askin' us on a date?" Happy asked.

"As long as the night ends with all three testing the limits of alcohol poisoning." Mac said, and the boys laughed.

"You got it." Tig said, and Mac started the truck, pointing it towards the clubhouse.

—


	11. Chapter 10

_Stahl had her feet up on her desk, relaxing after a long day. The death of the port commissioner was suspicious, and she had very little doubt that it was connected to the Sons of Anarchy, but she realistically had no way of proving it._

 _There had been no witnesses, there were no security cameras, no clues left behind except a slug from a high powered rifle. Stahl was tempted to think that this job was done too well for the Sons. They were typically more sloppy, more arrogant, less caring if they were caught. Whoever had killed the port commissioner had been the opposite._

 _She flipped through her look book on the Sons, freshly updated with movements, people, etc. Whatever might be important for her to know. She stopped when she encountered a new face. There were two photos, one a military head shot - serious, in uniform, no smile. The woman in the photo was wearing a nondescript uniform, and Stahl's book let her know that much of the info about the woman was classified. For now, her information was, interestingly enough, protected by national security._

 _In the other photo, the woman was smiling. She had curly black hair, green eyes, and was too pretty for Stahl to like. Her name was Mackenzie Torrell, and Stahl was interested to note that her file was labeled Possible OL. Her team had identified the girl as a possible only lady. That was interesting again, because this girl was not the Sons usual flavor. She was too wholesomely pretty. That national security background must be hiding something. If she was an old lady, though, she was usable for Stahl._

 _It took her a few minutes to put two and two together. The girl had professional training and the port commissioner's death sure had looked professional. Stahl sat up straight, taking her feet off the desk. She had no way to prove it, but she was now very sure Mackenzie Torrell was Hefner's killer. And that certainly made her Stahl's perfect next target._

 _—_

Coffee. That was the first and only thing Mac could think about when she opened her eyes. She slowly came into consciousness, remembering hazily what had happened the night before. Bits and pieces came back - tequila shots, lost pool games, Tig's crude jokes - they had had a night to remember. Or not.

Mac forced herself out of bed, cursing her hangover and shoving herself into the shower. She was staying in Chibs' room, and the whole place smelled like cigarettes, gasoline, leather, and him. The bathroom was no different. It was clean, which didn't surprise Mac after seeing his home. She stood under the water, letting it slowly bring her back to life. She hadn't gotten that drunk in a while, and she decided now that she was getting too old for it. Or more specifically, too old to deal with the hangovers.

When she felt reasonably human, she slowly made her way downstairs, trying to avoid making too much noise. She imagined the others had some vicious headaches as well. Downstairs, she could smell coffee, and it appeared the Chucky was awake, making coffee and breakfast. Clay sat at the bar, a cup in one hand, and an envelope in front of him. He turned to her as she walked in.

"The boys told me you had a time and a half last night." he said, grinning slightly. Mac couldn't help but wince.

"Oh yeah." she said, slipping into a seat beside him and gratefully accepting a mug from Chucky.

"All well after yesterday?" Clay asked.

Mac nodded. "He went without a mess." she said. "Cops didn't have it for a couple hours, though I'm sure they do now."

Clay nodded. "Went out on the radio yesterday afternoon. Look, we, the club, well, we wanna show our appreciation." he said. "This deal with the Irish… it's big. You've helped with that." He passed the envelope to her, and Mac didn't have to open it to know it was filled with cash.

"Clay, you guys don't have to-" she began, but he cut her off.

"Yeah." he said. "But we are." Mac opened her mouth to argue again, but just then Opie and Donna walked in. The first thing Mac noticed was that they were smiling. It changed Opie's countenance completely. Gone was the intimidating biker, and in his place was a man clearly in love with his wife. Something had changed since the last time Mac has spoken to Donna.

"Hey Ope, Donna." Clay said, and Mac couldn't help but notice the lackluster greeting, but she brushed it off.

"Hey guys." Mac greeted. "Where are the kids?" It was a Sunday, so they could't've been in school.

"With his mom." Donna said, smiling at Opie.

"Yeah." Opie agreed. "We needed ourselves a little free time." As he said it, he chased Donna a little, who giggled and turned away. It was clear they'd had a good night. Mac grinned. Clay motioned Opie over, and Mac went and sat with Donna, taking her envelope with her.

"So you had a good night." Mac said, and Donna blushed.

"I have to thank you." she said. "You really… helped. To be completely honest, I thought you were trash the first time I heard about you. But the other day, your little speech really helped. I love Opie more than anything. I'd go a lot to keep us together, and honestly, when he was in jail I forgot just how much of a family the club can be. I was being stupid."

"You weren't being stupid." Mac said. "Your husband was in jail and you wanted someone to blame. I can't blame you for that. But I am glad that you're… seeing the light. Such as it is."

Mac had a sudden idea then. She'd heard from Chibs, Tig, and Happy that Opie's five years in jail hadn't done any good for his finances, and Mac had an envelope full of cash that she definitely didn't need. She handed it to Donna.

"I want you to have this." Mac said. Donna's eyes went wide and she looked at the contents of the envelope. "I know it couldn't have been easy having him locked up for five years. You guys have two kids and I really don't need it."

There was a moment where Mac could see every thought running through Donna's head. The war between needing the money and not wanting to take charity.

"It isn't charity Donna." Mac said. "It's family looking after family." Donna looked up, tears in her eyes.

"This… this'll… you have no idea how much this will help." Donna said, and hugged Mac hard. Mac smiled, happy that the woman was accepting help without too much of a battle. When they separated, the two talked for a little while. Donna was curious about her relationship with Chibs, and Mac was willing to share a little. But mostly she was keeping an eye on Opie and Clay. There was a tension there that Clay was definitely the cause of, though it wasn't clear to her that Opie knew. Mac didn't know what, but something was up.

She didn't get much more of a chance to think on it, when Chucky suddenly stood up an announced: "We have company." There were cop cars pulling in to the garage's driveway.

Mac went with the group outside, shading her eyes from the sun; they were still pretty sensitive from her hangover. The cars parked right in front of the door, and the first person out was a tall woman wearing a suit. She had long reddish hair and a look on her face like everyone was either confusing or stupid. Mac immediately didn't like her. And so of course, the woman walked right up to her.

"I'm Agent June Stahl." she said. "Mackenzie Torrell?" Mac didn't move a muscle.

"I thought so." Stahl said. "I'm gonna need you to come with me." Mac still didn't move. "I'll cuff you if I have to." Stahl said. Mac turned to Clay.

"What's this about, Stahl?" Clay asked, stepping forward. Stahl didn't take her eyes from Mac.

"She's a person of interest."

"In what?"

"In whatever I want, Clay. Now let's go girlie." Stahl said, and motioned to the two deputies with her to get Mac into the car. Mac looked at Clay one more time, who nodded in a resigned sort of way, and Mac shook off the deputies, getting into the car of her own accord. Stahl smiled.

They never actually made it to the police station. It turned out the Stahl had a different plan, and Mac was surprised when they turned down a dirt road, drove a little way, and parked.

"Now." Stahl began, look at Mac in the rearview mirror. "There's no recorder, you're not on the record, it's just you and me having a chat." Mac rolled her eyes.

"How'd you end up in Charming?" Stahl asked, and Mac stayed silent.

"I saw a photo of you in uniform. Did some work for our government, huh?" Stahl said. "No one will tell me what, either. Must've been bad for it to be kept so secret." Mac still didn't say anything. She hadn't thought about being in the system, but she undoubtedly was. The US Military keeps records, even of their operatives that worked on mission that didn't officially exist. Mac met Stahl's gaze, refusing to give up anything.

"Well, it doesn't really matter what you did. You got trained." Stahl continued. "And the Sons, when they kill people, they're pretty sloppy. They leave a mark of sorts. I would guess that you don't."

Mac started to get nervous about where she was going with this.

"Now, what's interesting now is the death of Brenan Hefner, the port commissioner. We know he was connected to illegal activity somehow, and we're working on pinpointing it. I would bet that he was involved with the Sons somehow, but I'm not allowed to prosecute on a gut feeling. But I couldn't see their signature on his death. So imagine my pleasure when you pop up, involved with the Sons and trained very well. I would guess that you had something to do with Hefner's death. It's your signature."

Mac forced her face to relax. Stahl was watching her closely, and Mac hadn't been able to stop the lines of tension from crossing her face. But now that Stahl had revealed her cards, if Mac looked to be relaxed, maybe she could lead Stahl away from the truth.

"So here's the deal." Stahl continued. "You help me with the Sons, and I'll help you with Hefner." It was almost as if Stahl thought Mac didn't know how the system worked. Stahl had nothing on her but a gut feeling, and that wasn't prosecutable. Mac had left no evidence and no witnesses. As Stahl had said, she was trained.

"You don't have jack shit." Mac said. "I don't need your help."

"The fuck you don't." Stahl said, more angry now. "The Sons might like you now, but you aren't from their world. They're gonna use you and abandon you. Don't think otherwise. Then you're gonna wish you'd accepted my offer when it was still available."

Mac rolled her eyes again. Now she understood. Stahl thought she was an outsider, and wanted to use that trait to get info on the Sons.

"You're gonna have to try harder than that." Mac said, and then shut her mouth and looked out the window. She was done with this conversation. Stahl continued to try to talk, and kept it up for a god half hour, but Mac didn't say another thing. Eventually, Stahl ran out of juice, and the two were quiet as Stahl drove back to the clubhouse. Only one more thing was said.

"This isn't over." Stahl said as Mac got out of the car. Mac just flipped her off.

Mac was wildly happy to see that, among the Sons waiting for her, was Chibs. She went straight to him, and he enveloped her in a hug that made all the bad shit move away for a second. When they separated, Clay immediately started in.

"What'd the bitch want?" he asked.

"The same as with Luann, Donna, Cherry, and Tara." Mac said. "She wants to use me to get to you guys."

The guys were livid, of course, but there wasn't much they could do right then.

"She's gonna try again, but you guys, I can handle myself here." Mac said. "I'm not gonna roll, and she doesn't have anything on me." Mac specifically left out Stahl's mention of the port commissioner. Mac was confident that Stahl had nothing prosecutable, and there was no reason to worry the guys. If it got too bad, she could always tell Clay later. For now, she just wanted to leave.

The guys dispersed slowly, but they did eventually leave Chibs and Mac alone. She went to him again, and they leaned against her truck until Mac felt a little better.

"Do you have anything anytime soon?" Mac asked him.

"Nah." he said. "What'd you have in mind?" Mac dug out her phone and dialed the school. She called off for Monday, playing sick, before hanging up and turning to Chibs.

"Let's get outta here." she said. "Get some food, get on your bike, and just ride away." She moved closer, taking his face in her hands. "You remember those promises I made concerning her bike?" she asked. Chibs' crotch twitched as he thought back.

"Oh yeah, luv." he said, hands going to her waist. "How could I forge'?"

"Then let's go have some fun." she said.

—

The place Chibs chose was was a little gully on top of one of the small mountains outside Charming. It was surrounded by rock on three sides, and the rocks were topped with trees. The fourth side was completely open, with a beautiful view of the surrounding desert. A large tree made a sort of doorway. The only company were birds and small animals.

Chibs parked the bike off to the side of the little bowl the rock made. It was cushioned with grass, Mac saw, which would make for a better bed than rocks. Mac slid off the bike, stretching her stiff muscles, and put her helmet away. Chibs did the same, and then reached for her, walking her back into the rock wall and kissing her.

"Tis always the same, luv." Chibs said, having moved to her neck. "Havin' you pressed to me for the whole ride was almos' too much."

Mac giggled, enjoying the tickle of his beard and the warm feeling that was slipping through her body as they kissed. They stood like that for a while, but Chibs obviously had something else on his mind. He was normally pretty one-track-minded when it came to sex, and if he was focused, they would've already been naked. So Mac let him pull away slowly before walking with him to the bike to get the saddle bags.

As Mac unpacked a little, Chibs started to build a fire. It wouldn't get too cold at night, but it would get cold enough that they'd appreciate the extra warmth. There was already a ring of stones with coals in it. There were a couple of logs for sitting, and a larger flat stone obviously set up to act as a table. All in all it was a perfect spot for a little bare bones camping.

Mac set the blankets, water, and booze aside, and sorted the food. They'd have to pack it away before bed, but for now it would okay within reach. Pretty soon the fire was properly roaring, and Mac was sitting next to it, warming her bare feet. Chibs was teasing her about the smell.

"Won' have ta worry 'bout any animals tonight, no' with those weapons around." he said, referring to the smell of her feet, and Mac swatted at him with a hand, but without actual malice.

"Look." Chibs said. "I go'a tell you about some club stuff." Mac nodded, realizing that this was what he'd been thinking about earlier.

"Ya met Stahl." he said. "She's been after the club for a while. She's ATF. Now, we're guilty, and tha's the only time I'm gonna say tha'. But it's true. So we're try ta protect ourselves. She's been pullin' in the old ladies one by one, and I'm sure tha's par' o' the reason she brought ya in. She's try'na make a RICO case against us. Been using Otto, who's locked up in Stockton. Luann is try'na get to 'im firs'."

Mac nodded along. She had understood why she'd been taken in, and decided not to reveal to Chibs about the port commissioner. It was easier for him not to worry, especially when Stahl had absolutely no proof.

"Alright." she said simply. "The bitch isn't gonna get anything outta me either way."

Chibs smiled at her. "I didna think so."

Mac thought about what else had gone down.

"Tara told me she was in to help take care of Cameron." she said.

"Aye. My five months as a medic donnae hold up to a medical degree." Chibs grinned, and Mac laughed. "They're takin' 'im to Canada. Gotta smuggle the mick outta the country. He's on too many watchlists. Takin' Cherry with 'im as well. She's in some trouble with the law, no' sure wha'. They'll be okay once they're in Canada."

"Bet Half-Sack's not happy about that." Mac said.

"Nah, the prospect's no' happy at all. But he'll ge' over it."

"How close is he to becoming a member?" Mac asked.

"Couple'a months." Chibs replied. "Now, you never tol' me how yesterday went."

Mac shrugged. "Easy job. No witnesses, no evidence, just one shot with a rifle through the head. Happy was with me, drove the getaway car. Tig took care of the car once we were done. Oh, I got a tattoo as well." Mac rolled up her sleeve to show him the four-leaf clover. Chibs brushed a thumb over it.

"Any particular reason?"

"Couldn't get Hefner outta my head." she said. "Something about that particular job makes me uneasy. So I got a tattoo as a reminder. Does that make any sense?"

Chibs nodded. "Aye, it does."

Mac smiled. "You've seen the mission number. And then I've got a small skull on my ankle. Memory of my first job. The target was wearing a skull necklace."

"Aye, I've seen the skull as well." Chibs said. "If I remember it was during a very _pleasurable_ moment fo' ya." He was now almost leering at her, and Mac had to laugh. She remembered something involving him kissing his way up her legs, but hadn't realized he'd seen the tattoo then.

"And what about you?" she asked. Mac had seen all of his tattoos, but she was curious what any of them meant.

"I've go' a fair few, luv." he said. "One of the Anarchy symbol, one of the reaper." He slapped the position of each tattoo as he spoke. "A Celtic Cross on my shoulder, and the one on my wrist is a tribute on an old friend from the IRA. And o' course the money on my chest. Fuck you, pay me." Mac laughed again.

"Bruichneach." Chibs said. Mac furrowed her eyebrows. "Excuse me?" she said. She was pretty sure the word wasn't English, but on the off chance he was fucking with her, she asked.

"It means effervescent." he said. "Like your laugh." Mac smiled.

"It really is one of the only languages I've never really tried my hand at." she said. "I'm fairly fluent in Irish, but for some reason Scottish Gaelic escaped me." Chibs just smiled.

"Somethin' for me ta teach ya, then." Mac wasn't disappointed that she didn't know the language. Chibs was right, it would be fun for him to teach her. But she also liked the added element of surprise. And it was fun to listen to him speak it. It was very guttural. It suited him.

"Speak some more while I make sandwiches." Mac said. They'd brought a cooler bag, so they had some perishables, but Mac was going to make peanut butter and jellies. The kids at school had them often enough, but Mac hadn't had one in too long.

"Tha falt dorcha aig a 'chaileag còmhla rium, mo leannan." Chibs began to speak slowly, letting the syllables roll around, not really bothering to translate. Mac just listened as she put their food together.

"Chan eil gu math dubh, ach dorcha donn. Tha e searbh. Fiadhaich, coltach rithe. Ach cuideachd bòidheach, coltach rithe. Tha a sùilean uaine coltach ris a 'choille às deidh na h-uisgeachan, farsaing gu leòr gus fear a tharraing a-steach agus ga ghlacadh ann. Ach chan eil mi a 'gearan. Tha i cunnartach, mo leannan. Bidh ia 'caoidh uamhas a beatha air a h-anam, agus tha mi an dòchas gun leig i mi a bhith gan toirt aon latha a dh'aithghearr. Tha mi airson a gaol a bhuannachadh. Tha i an uairsin mo leannan, mo chompanach, mo phiuthar, mo charaid, mo chompanach. Dh 'fhaighinninn bàs dhi, dìreach mar a bhiodh i dhòmhsa."

"What does it all mean?" she asked, taking a bite.

"Just rambling." Chibs said, brushing it off, though he knew what he'd said had been true in his heart, he wasn't quite ready to share it with it's subject just yet. He was afraid of scaring her away.

They ate in companionable silence, listening to the birds and the breeze and watching the sun set and the stars rise. Mac cleaned up after them, putting the food away and hanging the bag up a tree. The only thing she kept out was a bottle of water and a chocolate bar.

She brought the blankets and food over near the fire and set everything down. Chibs was just watching her, dark eyes completely focused like he'd never seen anything more riveting in his life. Mac shivered and his gaze got even darker, if that was possible.

She walked back towards the bike to make sure everything was set for the night, and she heard as he stood up and followed her. She felt like prey. She stood, leaning on the bike, facing away from Chibs, hands clenched into fists. The firelight made their shadows dance on the rock wall.

He took his sweet time making his way towards her. It was a tease, and he damn well knew it. With every second, Mac could feel the heat seeping into her belly, just from the feeling of his eyes on her back. When she could smell his aftershave, she knew he was right behind her. He put his hands on her waist, and Mac jumped with surprise. The warmth from his palms felt like fire to her, like he was branding his handprints into her skin.

"Mackenzie." He whispered the word into the back of her neck, tickling her. She whimpered and leaned back into him, feeling the fullness of his arousal against her ass. She pushed back a little with her butt, wriggling slightly, and he growled in her ear, nipping the lobe softly.

"Tease." he whispered.

"Speak for yourself." Mac gasped out, as his hands moved under her shirt, splaying themselves against her tummy. One reached up, brushing her bra-covered nipple, and Mac moaned. This was apparently a breaking point for Chibs. Mac found herself turned around, his mouth against hers, tongues battling for dominance. One hand was on her ass, the other cupping the base of her head, guiding the kiss. She reached up and carded her hands through his hair. She loved it just a little long and wild.

Whatever Chibs was doing with his tongue was slowly driving coherent thought from Mac's mind, and his roving hands weren't helping. So before she completely lost it, she pulled hard on his hair, dragging his head back and baring his neck. She grinned at him, looking at here with what would've been a simple smile but for the desire on his face.

Then she attacked his neck. It was mostly clean shaven - he mostly only kept the beard and mustache - and the slight stubble tickled her lips. She left a mark he could cover with his scarf if he wanted to, pleased to note that the longer she worked, the farther his head fell. Then Mac made the mistake of pulling back to admire her work. Chibs acted immediately; boosting her onto the bike and pulling her shirt up over her head.

He reached around to undo her bra, and Mac arched back, bracing her hands behind her against the other edge of the bike, essentially presenting her chest for Chibs. He leaned down, cupping her head and kissing her again, letting his other hand tease both breasts. His mouth followed shortly after. Mac just held on for dear life, each brush of his tongue sending sparks down to her center. She whimpered again as he lightly bit at both nipples.

Suddenly he pulled away completely, and Mac was left with her chest heaving, wondering why he'd stopped. Then she felt hands roll down the socks she'd put back on once she was done warming her feet. One hand reached up and undid the button on her jeans. Chibs paused for a moment, kissing the tattoo on her ankle and smiling up at her before pulling her jeans and underwear down together.

He stayed kneeling before her, nudging her knees apart, and Mac started to worry that her arms wouldn't support her. Chibs wrapped his arms behind her ass and pulled her forward as far as she could. Mac couldn't even imagine what they'd look like to an outside observer right now. She was completely bared for the world, without a care. How could she care with Chibs' mouth _right there._

Mac keened when he tongued her clit, giving her exactly what she wanted. The coil in her stomach burned, and she knew this wouldn't take long. As long as he kept going. He teased her entrance with one hand, the other reaching up to play with her nipples. Mac kept herself braced. The last thing she wanted was for him to stop because she'd fallen off the bike.

He entered her with one, then two fingers, specifically avoiding the spot that would make Mac scream. His tongue continued to circle around her clit. The bastard was teasing her. He continued like this, holding her on the edge of orgasm, Mac alternately moaning and cursing him out. Eventually something in her snapped.

"God, Filip, _please._ " she said, begging him. That was all it took. He sucked her clit into his mouth at the same time his fingers brushed over her g-spot, and Mac exploded. She screamed loud enough to scare the birds from the trees, shaking uncontrollably. She saw stars, and only vaguely hear herself calling to Chibs with abandon.

When she came back to earth, she noticed that he had one hand at the middle of her back, taking her weight. Smart man. She opened her eyes to meet his grin. He looked very self-satisfied. It was then that Mac noticed the completely inequality in clothing between the two of them. She boosted herself into a standing position, knees still shaky but willing to hold her weight.

"My turn." she said, and his grin turned predatory again.

She slipped off his kutte, hanging it on the handles of the bike. He started to help, kicking off his boots as she pulled his shirt off. Then he was there in just his jeans and socks. Mac took a moment, tracing over the tattoos on his arms and chest. She let her fingers weave through the grooves of his muscles, tickling him slightly. She giggled when he squirmed. But she stopped teasing, popped the button on his jeans and helped him get completely naked.

Mac knew that sex on a bike was logistically difficult, but she had a plan. She spun him around and had him straddle the bike, facing backwards. Before she joined him, she palmed his neglected cock, running her thumb over the tip. Chibs jerked his hips up so hard he almost fell off the bike.

"Impatient, are we?" Mac teased.

"For you, always." Chibs replied, pulling her down for another kiss as Mac continued to rub him off. She pulled back when she was ready and told him to plant his feet. He was tall enough that he could comfortably brace his legs against the ground. Mac was not. She put a foot on one hold of the bike, and swung her other leg over, making sure to brush his cock as she did. He groaned, putting his hands on her hips again.

When she was ready, she guided him into her, and sank down completely all at once. Chibs let out a moan that seemed to come from somewhere around his toes, and Mac couldn't help but join him. She teased him for a while, forcing him to let her work, taking it nice and slow up and down. Slowly his grip on her waist got tighter and tighter, until she was sure she'd have bruises.

When she was sure his patience was gone - and if she was being truthful, so was her's - she let him take over. He planted his feet, shifted his hips forward to give himself room, and drove into Mac so fast she couldn't breathe. They were both quickly approaching the edge. Mac, who was now being held up by Chibs' hands around her waist, stopped scrabbling at Chibs' chest with her hands. One hand went to her clit, the other reached around her to Chibs' balls. They both moan simultaneously once again, and a few thrusts later, flew over the edge together, yelling for each other with not a care for who could hear. Mac collapsed against him, hoping that the bike wouldn't fall over.

It didn't, and so they took their time picking themselves up.

"You are amazing, luv." Chibs said, pushing her back towards the rock wall. They'd managed to get their shirts on before Chibs got distracted again.

"Believe it or no', I've never fucked on my bike before." he continued. "Now it's the only thing I'm gonnae be able to think of whenever I go to ride." Mac grinned. This had, of course, been part of the plan. Realization flashed in Chibs' eyes, and he crowded her against the wall, pressing their bodies together form chest to toes.

"Was tha' your plan?" he asked, and Mac only had room to nod and grin some more. He growled again, and kissed her hard. Mac felt her belly heat up again, and she reached in between them to feel Chibs' new hard-on. She played with him, teasing the head, running her fingers over the thick veins. Eventually Chibs' patience ran out again.

Mac was lifted up, and she instinctively wrapped her legs around Chibs' waist. He lined himself up and pushed inside of her. There was no teasing this time, just pure need, and Mac responded in kind. She tipped her head back as he mouthed at her chest through her shirt. She could feel the roughness of the rock under the fabric against her back, but it didn't hurt. She ran her hands over him everywhere she could reach, mostly carding them through his hair. She knew she was babbling incoherently.

Mac was approaching the edge quickly, and could tell by Chibs' twitching dick inside her that he was right there with her. Their moans increased in volume - Chibs' slightly muffled by her chest - until the coil snapped. Mac screamed again, yelling God in several different languages, seeing stars again. She felt Chibs follow her just moments after.

Slowly Chibs lowered her to the ground. They stayed in an embrace until their heartbeats had returned to normal, whispering and laughing to each other as the affronted birds slowly returned to the trees. They got dressed soon after, though Mac chose to wrap one of the blankets around her waist instead of putting her jeans back on. Chibs pulled her down between his legs as he leaned against the big tree, stretching his legs out. He wrapped a blanket around them as they ate the candy Mac had left out earlier, talking about absolutely nothing of importance. And slowly, wrapped in Chibs' arms, Mac faded off to sleep.

—


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N: There are going to be a fair amount of scenes that don't involve Mac. They're mostly there to advance the plot, and I will be keeping them as short as possible. Just bear with me if it seems a little jumpy. Enjoy!**

—

The cabin was stereotypical log. It was actually kind of cute, from the outside. The inside was a bit of a mess, probably partially due to it's current occupants. She was there to see Cameron, at his request. He apparently wanted to meet the girl who'd taken care of one of the Irish's enemies. At the request of his IRA bosses, of course.

Mac rather thought there was an exterior motive. So she went willingly when Clay informed her that the club was in no position to deny Cameron his request. Chibs just shrugged, confused. He hadn't been able to bring her up - club business - so Half-Sack had done so. The kid had run inside the minute they'd gotten there, supposedly to say goodbye to Cherry.

Cameron shook her hand when Mac walked in, deigning to get up, due to his injury. Mac just gave him a wry grin and waved away his apologies, sitting down next to him.

They exchanged pleasantries and talked for a little. Cameron wanted the details of the hit, but Mac skirted them. The fewer people knew all the details, the better. Eventually, Mac decided to get to it.

"What can I do for you?" she asked, getting right to the point.

Cameron obliged. "Yes. I have two goals. My bosses wanted me to meet you. And I have a message from one of them."

Mac nodded. "Well, you've met me. Check. What's the message?"

Cameron chuckled. "Go' a bit of fire? Alright, then. Not sure which of them it's from, or really what it's supposed to me. I suppose you'll know. It's: Feicim thú."

Mac went a little cold. The message was in Irish, not Scottish Gaelic. It took a second for it to register that it should be in Irish; she was dealing with the IRA. What was more disturbing was the translation.

 _I see you._

—

 _It has to be from Peter_. Mac was pacing her bedroom, thinking hard. She had had Half-Sack bring her home as fast as possible, trying not to give Cameron any clue that the message had thrown her for a loop. The only person she could think of that would send something like that would be Peter, but that would mean he had found her, connected her to the Sons, and was working against them. But that didn't make sense, because the Irish and the Sons had a good relationship. Maybe it was a harmless interest one of the bosses had taken in her. _It doesn't necessarily have to be Peter._ But even to herself she sounded hollow.

—

The next week or so was quiet for Mac. Chibs was mostly away dealing with the club, so Mac spent most of her time at work and at home, either alone or with Tara. The two women had caught each other up, and were kind of enjoying the quiet. When Chibs was busy, Jax generally was as well.

But today they were both at the clubhouse with the guys, who had just exited church, laughing. Chibs pulled her aside, kissing her and telling her that their plan concerning Otto and Luann had worked, and it had culminated in Otto beating the shit out of Stahl. Mac grinned wryly; it explained the laughing.

The guys were celebrating winning the battle, even if they still had to win the war. Shots were called for, and Mac took one, but decided to hang back from the rowdy group. It was this decision that had her watching Opie. She hadn't heard much from Donna since the money.

Something was still up there. He was their brother, and that connection was stronger than she'd ever seen it. Except there was a hesitancy between Opie and Clay. And also Tig, if Mac thought she was seeing right.

There wasn't much time to think on it though, before Half-Sack announced "We have company." and a half-dozen jacketed ATF agents stormed into the club house, yelling their heads off. It was over very fast. They had everyone face down on the clubhouse floor in a few seconds; most of them spitting out abandoned peanut shells. It was incredibly sticky and rather gross.

Mac lay there placidly, pulling faces at Tig as the agents walked through the clubhouse. It wasn't until she felt the pull that she realized she was being hoisted by the shirt and more than a little bit of her hair.

"Ow." she deadpanned, now on her feet. Stahl _the bitch_ stood in front of her, a smug grin on her face.

"This is her." Stahl said, and motioned to two agents to cuff Mac and take her away.

"Oi!" Chibs tried to get up but was wrestled and held by another agent. "What're you doin'?"

Clay tried unsuccessfully to kick Chibs to get him to quiet down, but Mac got the message.

"It's fine, Chibby." she said, putting a carefree smile on her face. "This'll be fun."

But Chibs wasn't having it.

"She's coming with me." Stahl said, giving Chibs a supremely arrogant look, which Mac knew would only incite him more.

"Why?" he snarled, still wrestling to get up.

Stahl stood there, pretending to think about it. "Because I said so." she said, clicking her tongue and turning to walk out.

"Mackenzie." Clay called to her. "We'll get our lawyer on this. We'll get you out."

Mac nodded, giving Chibs and the guys a helpless smile. Tig and Tara looked murderous, and Juice and the prospect upset, but it was Gemma that actually acted. She spit in Stahl's general direction, which earned her a swift kick in the stomach.

"Gemma!" Mac yelled, giving Stahl a venomous glare.

"Let's go." the woman said, very self-satisfied now.

And all Mac could do was given Chibs and the guys one last smile as she was lead out the door.

—

"She's being held at the police station." Clay was saying. "Unser can't get a straight answer on why. Stahl's a wiley bitch."

The Sons were back in church, discussing Mac's current state of affairs. They'd talked to Rosen, and no one seemed to be clear on whether or not Mac was being held for Hefner's murder. Rosen kept insisting that if that was the case, Stahl would've had to reveal it, but the guys weren't so sure that it wasn't a long con.

"Where's Ope?" someone eventually asks. No one answers.

"Maybe he's talking to the bitch." Tig meant to whisper it, but really it came out as a mumble. Really he hadn't meant to accuse Opie of something, but then it was too late. Jax and Piney had heard him.

"My son isn't a fucking _rat._ " Piney said angrily, and Jax's glare made Tig well aware of his position.

Tig put his hands up. "Just a thought, boys." and he left it at that. Clay caught his eye, letting him know he was questioning the same thing.

"I'm sure he's got family shit or somethin'." Jax said. "I'll go get him later. He's a loyal brother of this club. Not a rat."

—

Opie's house was quiet. His wife, his kids, the man himself; all nowhere to be found. Not unusual, but Jax had really been hoping to bring Opie back to fight for his status.

Jax found the key hidden under the door mat, and let himself inside. Everything was still and quiet. He shrugged to himself. They might be out to eat, at the park, at the movies, who knew. Jax walked farther it, looking into the living room, dining room, kitchen, yelling up the stairs. Nothing was out of place. Nothing, except for the business card of an Agent June Stahl sitting on the kitchen table.

"No." Jax said outloud, hearing the disgust in his own voice.

 _It can't be Opie. He wouldn't rat._

But… the man had been through some shit, and five years in the clink will change a man. But Jax wouldn't turn on Opie so fast.

 _Maybe Unser knows._ Next stop, police station. Maybe he'd get a chance to see Mac.

—

Mac wasn't sure how long she'd been sitting in a cell when they walked Unser past her. She gave him a questioning look. Unser was the one being restrained. The man just shrugged.

"Corruption charges." he said as he walked past. Mac stewed on that. It wasn't good news for the club; she knew they used Unser as an informant in the police station. Fat lot of good he would do them lock up in his own jail.

She sat for a little while longer, and once again, was unsure how much time had past when Gemma came to see her.

"Hey doll." the biker queen said, sitting outside Mac's cell. "They won't let ya out. The Stahl bitch is interfering."

"What's happening?" Mac asked.

"Well, it's not clear why you're in here, though Unser's charge doesn't help." Mac knew several things from that statement. They guys didn't know Stahl knew about Mac's job, and they didn't know if that job was why Mac was being detained.

"But Rosen's on it, and the lawyer's good, for a lawyer." Gemma continued, and Mac had to smile at Gemma's disdain. "Chibs misses ya too, sweetie." Mac warmed a little. She missed Chibs. "He's furious, as are the rest of the guys, but I think it's worse for him. He really does like you." Gemma looked like she had a million questions as she eyed Mac, but they had limited time.

"Anyways, things are a little tense right now. Jax found Stahl's business card on Opie's kitchen table. Ope's whole family is gone now, apparently taken in the middle of the night - not against their will, mind you - and the kids somehow ended up at Stockton. Ope's mom got a call to come pick them up. Plus, someone paid the rest of his debt off. Juice did some research, turns out it was a federal wire transfer."

Gemma's voice dropped to a whisper. "Startin' to look like he sold you out." So Gemma knew about Mac's involvement. That made sense, given her position. But Mac didn't buy Opie as a rat. Not with the new light that Donna had seen. Plus the man's relationship with Jax and his old man? Didn't make sense.

Mac was fairly quiet for the rest of Gemma's visit, which ended abruptly when Stahl showed up.

"How's the stomach?" Stahl asked Gemma, and Gemma's face went a color that couldn't've been healthy. But she didn't respond, just pursed her lips and marched out.

"Good to see you're learning." Stahl said, and it was a credit to Gemma that there wasn't even a hitch in her step.

"Now, you." Stahl turned her attention to Mac.

"You're interesting, and don't take that as a compliment." Stahl said. "I did some more digging into you. A very valuable operative for our government. They wouldn't confirm much more than that, which tells me more than if they'd bothered. You're a killer. Does the club know that? Chibs Telford?"

Mac tried to look bored.

"Well, if the club knows, it makes even more sense that they hired you to kill the port commissioner. It all makes a fucked up sort of sense."

Mac sighed. "This going somewhere?" she asked, allowing annoyance to seep into her voice.

"Let's sum up. You show up, somehow already friends with the Sons of Anarchy, which isn't the easiest feat. They make you a club friend, and you start dating Filip Telford. They ask you for a favor, even if it is through the Irish, and, well, its hard to say no to them. A quick rifle shot, and it's all very well hidden, but still."

Mac relaxed minutely. The woman didn't know about her current contract work, and had no suspicions of her other jobs done for the Sons. The connection to the Irish was interesting; Mac hadn't realized that Stahl knew about it. Unsure of where the woman was going, Mac stayed quiet.

"It was too neat for me, though." Stahl continued. "So I went back to the beginning. Questioned why you left the military in the first place. See the thing about you _enforcers_ is that you don't get tired of your work. You aren't really human, after all. I harbor suspicions that you get enough pleasure out of it to never want to stop. Most are stopped by old age. But you left. And why? Why, Mackenzie? What were you running from?"

Mac simultaneously snarled and went cold. Stahl's point of view of enforcers was something that Mac had heard before and had often wondered about herself, but that didn't mean she wanted to hear it from Stahl of all people. And Mac didn't really consider herself an enforcer, at least not in terms of the club. They had Happy for that.

But she couldn't really respond to that right now. She was too busy silently freaking out about Stahl's last question. Did the bitch find out about Peter? Mac kept her face schooled, but it was like Stahl could smell the sudden panic.

"Think about that, okay?" Stahl said. She gave Mac a sickening smile, and walked away. Bitch.

—

Mac sat for a while, watching the light in her cell change. Thoughts of Opie and Donna, the IRA and the Sons, and Brenan Hefner's back twirling in her head. She thought of Chibs too, wanted desperately to be back at that quiet mountaintop with him.

It had been a while since Gemma's visit, so it was possible that something had changed, but Mac really wanted an answer on Opie being a rat. So when a deputy walked by her cell, she started to act.

"Hey." she said belligerently. When that didn't work, she go loud. "HEY!" she said, "Mr. Uniform."

The deputy stopped and turned towards her, annoyed. He raised his brow.

"I want my phone call." Mac said. The deputy just looked at her.

"Hey, I gotta call someone to get bail, or I ain't ever gettin' outta here." Mac tried to squash the accent from her voice, and she mostly succeeded.

The deputy just sighed. He grabbed his keys and Mac did an internal happy dance.

"Let's go then." he said, unlocking her cell door. "The sooner we get you outta here, the less I have to deal with you."

He lead her through the station to a phone on the wall and handcuffed her to a bar next to it.

"I'll be around the corner now, but I can still see you, so don't try anything." He walked away.

Mac dialed the operator and asked for the ATF main number, then slowly worked her way through secretaries and various departments until she reached Karen Barkman. Karen was a friend, one who owed Mac a favor. Mac hadn't really wanted to use it until she absolutely had to, but if Opie really was a rat, Mac was in trouble. k

Karen picked up on the first ring.

"Karen Barkman."

"Karen, it's Mackenzie Torrell."

"Mackenzie? Wow. It's been a while. How are you?"

"I'm good, been better though. You?"

"Okay. What's up, why are you calling?"

"Need a favor. Big one."

There was a pause.

"Shoot."

Mac grinned. "I'm doing some background for a job, and I need a confirmation on an ATF informant. It'd be under Agent June Stahl."

"Oh, I've heard of her." Karen said. Mac could hear typing in the background. "Piece of work. Stay far away."

Mac grinned some more. "I'll do my best."

"What's the name?" Karen asked.

"Harry Winston, goes by Opie; O-p-i-e."

"Ah yeah, Sons of Anarchy member, identified as possible weak link. Stahl brought him and his family into Stockton the other night, but he hasn't said shit. Doesn't seem like he will either. It looks like they paid him. And bugged his car. Jesus, she's trying to frame him. Harsh tactics. If that gets him killed she might be in some trouble. Anyways, that enough for you?"

Mac was silent. She had a death grip on the phone. Opie wasn't a rat, and if the guys found those bugs he was fucked. Shit. _Shit._

—

Mac had just hung up the phone when Stahl came charging around the corner.

"Got away with it, huh?" Stahl asked, unlocking Mac's handcuffs and none-to-gently relocating them behind her back.

"She doesn't get a phone call, she wasn't booked or anything." Stahl was yelling at the deputy. "She's one of mine."

"We can track those phone calls, you know." Stahl said as she lead Mac away. But Mac just grinned. The logs would say she'd called the operator. Even if they lead Stahl to the ATF, it would only confuse her. Mac was internally panicking, because now she had no way to inform the guys of her discovery. She'd pulled the phone call trick. Plus now Stahl was leading her past her original cell.

"We're putting you way back here." Stahl said. "Where you can't cause any trouble."

Mac was uncuffed, shoved inside, and the door was thrown behind her.

"Enjoy the silence." Stahl said, and walked away.

—

The meeting with Rosen wasn't going well. The more Clay and Tig looked at it, the more Opie looked like a rat.

"Hash it out again." Rosen said, still taking notes.

Clay rolled his eyes and motioned to Tig.

"It was Mac, Clay, Ope, and I when we asked Mac to help us out. Chibs knew as well. Now Opie's gone, and it looks like the Feds payed off the rest of his debt. He's a rat."

Tig was furious. How dare Opie rat on Mac?

Rosen opened his mouth to ask another question, but was interrupted by stealing tires as a truck flew into the lot. It parked, and Opie and Donna hopped out.

"Ope!" Jax called, striding out of the garage. Opie embraced Jax, who froze in surprise before returning the hug.

"What's good, Opie?" Jax asked, pulling away. The rest of the Sons gathered around.

"I'm not a rat." Opie said immediately. "I know what that Stahl bitch did; paid off my debts. She made me off as a rat, but I'm not. I love this club. You guys are my brothers. I would never turn rat."

It was a short speech, but it had every brother expect Clay and Tig relaxing just a little. It would take some balls for Opie to show his face at the clubhouse after ratting on SAMCRO. Jax embraced Opie again.

"And you?" Jax turned to Donna. "I know you had your reservations."

"His mother tried to talk me out of it." Donna said, taking Opie's arm. "But your girl was right." She motioned to Chibs, talking about Mac. "I've always loved the man, and now I will love the club."

There was conviction in her voice that the guys hadn't heard there before, and Jax nodded approvingly.

"Let's go inside then, to church." Clay said, and the group turned to walk towards the clubhouse.

Clay stopped Tig before he could walk away.

"Search that truck for bugs." he said under his breath. "I'll have Gem keep Donna occupied."

Tig does as he's told, and when he tells Clay what he found and destroyed, Clay just about explodes.

"Ope's a rat. He'll die for this." he growls to Tig, and Tig can only nod.

—

The best news Jax had gotten all day was from Tara. His son was ready to come home. Of course, this meant Gemma planning a homecoming party, and the club was under nine feet of shit lately, but that didn't matter. His son was ready to come home. No matter what Tara or his mom thought, he'd love this kid. Even if he didn't know how.

Rosen was still working on the Mac situation, even if there wasn't much else they could do on that front. The Mayans had been told the guns were coming, that the Sons were just waiting on the Irish connection to deliver. The Irish were pretty happy thanks to Mac, and that lead Jax right back to Mac stuck in jail.

The blond just sighed and shook his head. He let his thoughts go back to Abel, and tried to forget about club shit for a few minutes.

—


	13. Chapter 12

Mac was antsy. Unser had stopped by to tell her she was getting out and that he was just waiting for Stahl to release her.

 _About damn time._

She paced until Stahl showed up. The woman was clearly not in a good mood. Mac just grinned, knowing it would infuriate her further.

"I have to let you out." Stahl said, unlocking the door. "But don't let this go to your head. As I told Otto, I'm taking the club, and it's friends, down. Trust me." But Mac, too thrilled with her release to care about Stahl's threat, just laughed and walked down the hall towards Unser.

They hurried to Unser's car. Unser wanted to know what the rush was, but Mac just kept telling him to hurry up. She wanted to get to the guys before something bad happened. God knows what they would do if they thought Opie was a rat, and had serious proof to back it up.

 _Please don't be rash, boys. Think!_

Her first hint that it was too late was when she and Unser drove past Donna in Opie's truck.

 _That's odd._

Her second hint was Opie driving past them in Donna's car with the kids.

 _Oh, they must've switched cars._

Her third hint was when they pulled up to the party, and Tig was pulling away on his bike, wearing a sweatshirt over his kutte. Clay stood at the curb, watching Tig drive away.

 _Oh god._

Mac felt like her brain was moving through molasses.

 _A sweatshirt? That doesn't make sense, the guys always wear their… oh, he doesn't want to be recognized. Wait. That means… oh Tig no! Where's the rest of the guys, wait, do they know? Did Clay and Tig do this alone? Tig's going after Opie in his truck, but that's not Opie, it's fucking Donna. Oh god. Oh God!_

Mac jumped out of the car before it'd stopped. She heard Unser yelling behind her, but didn't stop. She needed to catch Tig, and had no form of transportation.

 _Conniving BITCH._

This was Stahl's fault. Careless bitch had framed Opie and now had no plan to save him or his wife. Mac ran into the house, scaring the crap out of a couple of guests, and searched until she found Chibs.

"Chibs!" she yelled, and the Scot turned.

"Mackenzie!" he yelled back, giving her an enormous grin. "You're out!" He strode to her, ready to embrace her, but Mac stopped him.

"Your bike, we need to take your bike." Mac was panting.

"What?" Chibs asked, confused, the grin sliding a little.

"No time." Mac said. "Please, Filip, we need to leave!" There was genuine panic in her voice, and it was that that spurred Chibs into action. He hadn't heard genuine panic there before.

"Okay, okay darlin' let's go." he said, and Mac grabbed his hand, forcing him into a fun. The rest of the guys followed, curious. Everything was moving too slow for Mac. It was precious seconds before they were on Chibs' bike and moving, stopping for helmets and for questions that Mac didn't answer.

"Just drive." was her constant answer.

Finally they were moving, and Mac kept yelling faster until Chibs was going dangerously fast and ignoring most traffic signals. Mac barely notices the rest of the Sons following them, but she definitely takes notice when Opie joins them, now sans kids, but still in Donna's car. Mac thinks back to where she was when she saw Donna driving, and makes her best guess at where she might be now.

It is pure luck that the group catches up to Tig.

The image is frozen in Mac's mind. Donna in the truck, stopped at an intersection. A black SUV parked behind her. A man in a black sweatshirt pointing a gun through Donna's back window.

"STOP BY THAT MAN." Mac yelled in Chibs' ear, and Chibs lays down rubber trying to slow down enough to not run the guy over. Mac jumps off as soon as she can, abandoning her helmet and running towards Tig.

"TIG NO!" Mac screamed, tackling him as soon as she reaches him. There's a brief scuffle where Tig doesn't realize it's Mac who tackled him. And when he does he's wildly confused.

"Mac?" he asks.

"You _idiot._ " Mac yells at him. "That conniving bitch played you. Opie's not a rat! And now look what you almost did!" Mac points at Donna, who's just stepping out of the truck after seeing the commotion behind her.

Tig goes so white Mac wonders if he'll pass out.

Opie runs to Donna then, and as the guys gather around Tig - with his sweatshirt and his gun - what almost happened slowly crosses the group.

The truth comes out in stops and starts.

"No one move." Mac says, in a low voice that is infused with something that makes the guys respect her command.

"Mackenize." Chibs speaks now, and his voice reflects the severity of the situation. "Wha's goin' on?"

Mac took a deep breath. "When I was stuck at the station, I tricked a deputy into giving me a phone call. I called an old friend at the ATF, and she confirmed that the Feds were making Opie look like a rat. They took him from his house without force, and Stahl left her card there on purpose. She wanted you to find it. She also wanted you to find the federal wire transfer that paid off the rest of Opie's debts. But Opie was let out. He came back and convinced you all that he wasn't a rat, right?"

There were nods from most everyone; with the notable exception of Tig and Clay. Mac narrowed her eyes.

"But it seems that two of you still didn't believe him. Those two searched Opie's truck and found the bugs, right? So you decide that Opie has to die, for the good of the club. And this set up, right now, was a mistake. It wasn't supposed to be Donna with a gun pointed at her, it was supposed to be Opie. That sound about right?"

She was talking completely to Clay and Tig now, and they both nodded.

"You _fucking_ idiots." Mac's voice was scathing. "I got confirmation from the friend that Stahl planted the fucking bugs. You were about the kill the wife of an innocent man."

—

A few hours later, Mac was sitting on the curb with Gemma and Donna. They both had an arm wrapped around Donna, who seemed to be alternating between fury and terror. Understandable, considering she'd almost been shot by a friend aiming for her husband.

Tara was tending to Clay and Tig, both of whom had had the shit beaten out of them by various angry club members. The rest of the guys were sort of circled around them, and they were still trying to hash out everything that had happened. It was slowly becoming clear that Clay and Tig had honestly thought Opie was a rat - and Mac had explained several times over how the ATF had purposely tricked them.

It didn't look like the guys would be done anytime soon, so when Tara wandered back over to Mac, they decided to head home. Chibs gave her a hug and a kiss, and looked disappointed to see her leaving, but he needed this time with his club. Mac's job was done. They had some healing to do, so Mac just told him that she'd be okay, and to find her when he was ready.

Something was up with Tara, Mac could tell. She waiting until they were in Tara's car, driving away, before asking.

"What's wrong, Tara?" Mac asked. Tara was silent for a few moments.

"You mean besides the clusterfuck we just left behind?" Tara asked sarcastically. Mac was quiet.

Tara sighed. "Something's up with Jax and Wendy."

"His ex?" Mac asked.

"And the mother of his child." Tara shook her head. "Jax and I, it kind of feels like our relationship never stopped, just paused for a while. Except that we've both changed. He's got a kid with a junkie and now this shit with his club. Gemma keeps saying that if you love the man, you learn to love the club. Do they know how hard they make it?"

Mac smiled. "It doesn't sound like it's the club that you're having trouble loving, Tara."

"Love isn't the problem. I kissed him in front of Wendy and he panicked. Said he was worried about her getting upset and relapsing."

"Bullshit." Mac said. "Look, he's allowed to have his club problems and his kid problems and his baby momma problems, but when it comes to relationships, if Wendy wants to be in Abel's life she's gonna have to get used to you."

"I'm worried that if I tell him that, he's gone." Tara said.

"If he leaves, he's an idiot. And I think that's all you need to know, Tara. You went and grew up, and so did he, in his own way. You two still clearly work. It's not as if you're asking him to give up his son. Hell, you saved the kids life. If he still wants to try with Wendy, that's his problem. You can't blame yourself for that, and it's not fair that he half-asses a relationship with you while he's trying to figure shit out in his head, especially if it's going to end with him back with Wendy. I think it's fair that you tell him that."

See, this was what Mac appreciated about her and Chibs' relationship. It was laced with complications from their past and from the club, but Chibs had said their marriage was over in all but name, and Mac believed him. Nonetheless, she decided to talk to Jax at some point. Tara was her best friend, and if the asshole was going to hurt her, Mac would do her best to soften the blow.

—

Mac had just gotten off the couch for another beer when she and Tara heard the motorcycles. Tara stood up, looking out the front window.

"Chibs and Jax." she said, and Mac smiled. The time in jail had passed slowly without Chibs with her.

Tara let the guys in, and Jax immediately went to her. Tara gave him a hug, but it was clearly perfunctory at best.

"We gotta talk." she said quietly, and Jax nodded.

"Let's go to my place." he said, and the pair left with Tara yelling out a goodbye to Mac. Mac grinned and responded from behind Chibs, who had embraced her as soon as he'd walked in. As the door closed behind Tara and Jax, Mac turned her attention to the man in front of her.

"Chibs?" she said. "Are you… shaking?"

He was. Her man was shaking.

"Whoa, Filip, what's wrong?" Mac asked, pulling back in an attempt to see his face.

He looked… scared.

"I jus'…Donna is Opie's girl, his old lady, and to see her almost killed…" he trailed off, but Mac got the jist.

"Filip, I'm here." Mac said, taking his face in her hands. His brown eyes were big and sad. Mac honestly didn't know what to say, and so she just returned his hug, trying to convey everything she felt without words.

"Don't leave me." he finally said, quietly. "You're not allowed to die. You have to keep yourself safe." Mac just hugged him tighter. Chibs sighed, clearly still upset. When he kiss her, it was different from their norm. It was still passionate, but it was slow and soft and - dare Mac say it - loving. When he took her clothes off, it was in adoration, treating her like she was fragile. When they finally came together, it was unhurried, but with a sense of something _more._ Like every other time had been sex, but this time they were making love. When he cried out her name, it was like a prayer. Mac felt her eyes burn with tears. No one, not even Peter, had made her feel like this.

—

 _Well_ , Mac thought, _it could've gone worse_.

The guys had just come out of church, and while everyone looked grim, they were at least alive. Most of the old ladies were sitting outside, including Donna, who was still silent and grim, though she did look better than the night before. They were supposed to be planning a Halloween party in a few days time, but they were understandably distracted.

According to Chibs, Opie, Clay, and Tig hadn't come to a resolution, not that anyone really thought there was a good resolution for something like this. It was clear that Tig and Clay were doing what they thought was best for the club, being purposely mislead by Stahl. Opie was, of course, pissed that they didn't believe him when he told the club he was in it for good, and explained how he was not a rat. The rest of the club was pissed for the same reason, and also pissed that Clay and Tig had made such a large decision without telling anyone. And everyone was pissed at Stahl. _Conniving bitch._

When the guys came out, Donna quickly went to Opie, who gave her a smile. Mac looked at the group appraisingly. Tig was in about as much shock as Mac had ever seen him in. He was also more apologetic than Mac had thought he could be. It was clear that this was going to stick with him for a while. _Good._ Than there was Clay, who also looked guilty. _That he should._ And finally Opie, who looked more relaxed than Mac had maybe ever seen him.

"Well?" Gemma asked the group at large.

Opie nodded. "We'll be fine." he said, and Mac saw the room relax. The guys didn't look happy in general, but there was something between them that hadn't been there the night before.

"But." Opie continued. "I will not have us doubted again. We're as much a part of this club as anyone - I did five _fucking_ years inside for you guys - and I'll will have that respect. We are not rats, have never been, never will be. If anyone else doubts that, speak now."

The room was silent. Mac felt like Opie had grown a foot just from his tone of voice.

"Good." Opie said. "Now, if what happened yesterday ever happens again, in any way, shape, or form, your good intentions won't matter. I won't have our loyalty to the club publicly or privately doubted every again."

There was silence. Then Gemma - thank god for Gemma - walked over to Opie and Donna and gave them a hug. It was the match. There were hugs all around - Mac privately thought she saw tears in Tig's eyes, though the tough guy would never admit to it - and she rather thought they'd found a way forward. It wasn't perfect, and it was kind of fucked up, but it was something.

—

Mac found herself on the porch of Gemma's house with Jax, both enjoying a break from the party-planning madness that they'd been conscripted into. Jax was brewing about something, but Mac didn't care. She put Tara above Jax, and she was damn sure going to find out what the fuck was going on with the Prince.

"Jax, are you fucking your ex behind Tara's back?"

Mac had been hoping to break through his walls with one stroke, and it had worked. He choked on his beer, coughing and turing to glare at Mac.

"What the fuck, Mac?" he asked. "No!"

Mac raised in eyebrow. "I dunno what happened after you left our house the other night, but before you and Chibs showed up she and I had a pretty concerning conversation about you and Wendy."

Jax made like he wanted to interrupt, but Mac held up a hand.

"No, let me finish. She's my best friend. She's my sister like Chibs is your brother. I don't give a damn about the club; if you hurt her pointlessly - and that includes sleeping with your junkie ex behind her back - I'll hurt you worse. And you know that's a promise. She's a good woman Jax, and she's trying to come to terms with what it means to be your Old Lady. She has it in her, I can see it, but you've gotta give her yourself, or there's really no incentive. She's doing it for you. She's strong, smart, she's a wonderful mom to Abel, and she loves you. Yes Jax, loves you. So what the fuck is wrong?"

Jax sighed. "I'm not sleeping with Wendy. What I said to Tara was an excuse to not put our relationship front and center right now. I can't do it again. If she's gonna leave, if she's gonna find some excuse to walk away, I can't put everything into her and have that happen again. I have to know."

Mac nodded, but Jax didn't seem done.

"I was just… there's some shit with the club and you know most of it but… I found something. An… inheritance from my father, something that tells me Clay is… I dunno. I just wonder sometimes if brotherhood is worth it. The pain I've put Tara through in the past, and probably the future. Wouldn't it just be easier to leave? Walk away? I just… Never mind."

Mac let him ramble. She couldn't be sure of what he was saying, but she had a fair idea. Jax had been trying to force the club into a more respectable earning direction. Away from the danger and the greed and the fear and towards brotherhood and family. It was something that Mac respected about him. She suspected that the idea came completely from him. Now this thing with his father, well, maybe it was pushing him too far away. The club couldn't afford to lose Jax, that much was obvious, and Chibs would be devastated to lose the son-figure in his life. And on top of that, Mac truly believed the brotherhood was completely worth it.

"The club is going to come to a point, Jax. I don't know when, maybe tomorrow, maybe in ten years, when it's going to have to decide if it's worth it. And maybe it isn't. Maybe you should listen to you dad. But in my experience, if I learned anything from my uncle, the people we look up to can be right, but also very, very wrong. Don't throw it all away on the word of someone else, Jax. I think you're doing the right thing, trying to drive the club in the direction that you are. And I think if you're careful, you can bring everyone else around with you. There's fear and danger and greed right now, but I think once that curtain is lifted, your brothers will come to appreciate the hard road they've taken. Don't blindly throw your lot in with someone else's experiences."

Mac stood up, thinking she'd said plenty, and walked back inside, leaving Jax out on the porch to think. She jumped back into the party madness. It was Halloween, which meant other charter members making an appearance and more raucousness fueled by an absurd amount of booze and, of course, the requisite croweaters. It meant that the planning was more intensive than usual, and Mac was quickly roped back into it.

Luann wandered over to her after a while, and the two women chatted about nothing in e particular while going over possible decorations. Mac is half-listening as Luann talks about CaraCara and the regular disputes she deals with in her stars. And then Mac has an idea.

"Luann, can I ask you something?" Mac said. The woman nodded.

"Would you put me in front of the camera?" Luann looked surprised, but she leaned back, evaluating Mac with a critical eye.

"You've got a nice body, good tits, pretty face, hair I can work with. Yeah, I think so. Can you act?" Mac grinned at the woman's frank study of her.

"Thanks, but I didn't mean like that." Mac said. "I want to do something for Chibs. Something that involves tasteful photos, possibly sans clothes." A smile creased Luann's face.

"Oh sweetie, why didn't you just say so?" she said. "It's a wonderful idea. I have the best ideas already. Oh, we'll have to find a time to get you in there, all female crew of course, and you'll have final say on all the photos. Oh, the things we can do. Maybe something Scottish? Or something that shows off your background?" Mac just grinned at her excitement.

She hadn't planned on asking Luann for this, but the more she thought about it, the more she liked the idea. She liked her body, and she certainly didn't mind showing it off for Chibs, and he would appreciate - in more than one way - the photos. So why not? Mac just smiled and kept at work on the party stuff, listening to Luann's excited chatter beside her.

—

The night of the Halloween party, Mac was taking her time. The week had actually gone back to normal. In a way. Mac was on tenderhooks at work, thanks to her short stint in jail and to Stahl's meddling, but her students had been happy to see her and Mac had actually relished a little bit of, well, legality in her life. So after school, she'd gone straight home to find Tara and get ready for the party. There was something telling her this would be a big one, and not just that it was Halloween.

"Where you at, Tara?" Mac yelled as soon as she got in the front door.

"Kitchen!" Tara called back.

Mac tossed her stuff on the table, the two friends exchanging small talk and excitement for the upcoming party. Something was on Tara's mind, though.

"So, Jax says you talked to him." Tara said, and Mac just blinked, surprised that Jax had come clean to Tara about their conversation. She just raised an eyebrow in question.

"Thanks." Tara said, and Mac was even more surprised. "You helped."

"I'm glad." Mac said.

"Look." Tara said. "He's got the weight of the world on his back. Between the club, Clay, his mom, and his son; it's tough for him. And I want to be there to help." Mac's eyes widened in surprise.

"Are you saying what I think you're saying?" Mac asked.

"We're gonna give it another go." Tara said, a smile creeping across her face. "Mac, he had his head in the clouds over something his father gave him. But whatever you said, it's like you cleared the fog just enough for him to find his way. And he and I, we talked about Wendy, and how he was using her like a shield in case I left again, but I can't leave, Mac. How can I leave him and his child?"

"Yours now too, no?" Mac asked. Tara shrugged.

"As good as." she said. "Jax was surprised that I was okay with it, but the kid deserves a better mother than Wendy, and if I'm going to be Jax's old lady, I'm going to do it properly."

"Properly?" Mac asked.

"Like Luann. Like Donna. And especially like Gemma." Tara said. "I'll embrace the man and the club. Not one because of the other but both."

Mac grinned big. "Excellent." she said. "That's fantastic. Welcome back. So, is the sex everything you remember it being?"

Mac had to dodge when Tara threw a carrot at her.

—

Mac was just putting the finishing touches on her lips when Tara walked in.

"Christ." Mac said, staring at her friend. "I should warn everyone that their childhood's are about to be ruined." Tara grinned at her. She was Snow White, but in a skirt-top combo that Mac was sure would never be allowed on television, much less a Disney movie. Mac bit her lip to stop herself from making a porn star joke. Tara looked fucking fantastic, and Mac didn't want to scare her into changing.

"And you are?" Tara asked. "Save a horse, ride a… Scotsman?" Mac flipped Tara off, but rather thought she had the right idea. Mac was a cowgirl, right down to the cowboy boots that came from a mission a while back. She was wearing painted on blue jeans and a belt, topped with a red and white gingham shirt that was tied off like a crop top. She had a proper hat too, and was trying to tame her hair so that she could wear it.

"Cowgirl, huh?" Tara asked. Mac nodded.

"Easiest thing to do." she said. "Though I'm pretty sure all the shit I've collected from various mission could make almost any costume." She turned to Tara for final approval.

Her friend nodded. "Perfect." Tara said. "Nice stud." Mac had put her belly button piercing back in, knowing it would drive Chibs just a little crazier. She was looking forward to a good night.

"You as well." Mac said. "Shall we?" Mac motioned out the door. "Let's go find our boys." Tara said. They both smiled.

—

Chibs had been at the clubhouse pretty much all day, and now was no different. The party was starting to pick up, and he had to admit that the old ladies and crow eaters had done a god job. The place was decked to hell with spooky, gore-centered decorations, with some happier-looking ones. There was halloween candy in bowls everywhere. There were brothers from several other charters down for the holiday, and more crow eaters than Chibs had seen in a while. His focus was on Happy and Tig playing a game of pool when Mac walked in with Tara. He almost dropped his beer. Jax, beside him, let out a low whistle.

His girl was wearing jeans that left absolutely nothing to the imagination, and Chibs had to forcefully tear his eyes away to look at the rest of her. She had proper cowboy boots and a gingham shirt that was tied high to show off her flat stomach. It was unbuttoned enough to show off her chest as well. Chibs had a moments thought of tearing out the eyes of every other guy here. Then she caught his eye, and tipped the cowboy hat she was wearing at him, and Chibs could only grin at her.

He noticed that Jax was staring at Tara with equal fervor, and it wasn't hard to see why. The normally button-up doc was wearing a skirt-top combo that he recognized as one of the disney princesses. He thought maybe it was Snow White. But either way, she'd earned Jax's stare. The two girls exchanged grins before walking over. Chibs ground his teeth, noticing heads turn and eyes follow them across the clubhouse.

"Happy Halloween, boys." Mac said, giving Chibs a kiss. He put his hands on her bare waist, keeping her in front of him. He looked her up and down slowly, and it was then that he noticed something sparkly in her belly button. _Hello._

He brushed a thumb over it, and met Mac's eyes.

"You've been hiding something from me." he said, his voice betraying his desire. The stud was low-key and sexy on Mac's flat stomach.

"I thought you'd like it." Mac said, giving him a big smile.

"I do." he said. "All of it." His hands tightened on her waist.

Mac smiled at him, but before she could continue the conversation, she was dragged away by various Sons and Tara for drinks. Mac let herself get tipsy - she was safe here, surrounded by Chibs and Tara and those she'd come to know as her family. She danced with Tara and Donna and Chibs, let Tig fail to drink her under the table, kicked Half-Sack's ass at pool. She talked with - or rather at - Happy, who looked suspiciously happy. It was relaxed. Mac watched happily as Donna and Opie danced together, she tried her best to cheer up Half-Sack, who was missing Cherry, and Luann, because Otto was in jail.

 _Surrounded by family._

—

When Mac woke up, Chibs was gone, and there was a piece of paper on her bedside table.

 _Mackenzie-_

 _Left before the sun rose. I'll see you tonight at CaraCara. Good luck today._

 _-C_

Mac sighed and laid back against the pillow. She had to get up and go to work, but she wasn't looking forward to today. Thanks to her stint in jail and her growing relationship with the Sons, she was being forced out of her job. There were new enemies in two; Chibs had been telling her about Zobelle and the two Hale's, and Mac was their next casualty. The school couldn't have it, so Mac had turned in her two weeks notice, and today was her last day. She'd be sad to leave it, but it wasn't like she needed the income. She did feel bad for abandoning the kids, though. Teaching had been the normal in her life.

Mac sighed again and forced herself out of bed. There was other stuff too. Gemma had been up in arms lately and Tara new why, but had been apparently sworn to secrecy. Add to it that whatever was going on with Gemma was turning her against Clay, and it was a recipe for a ton of tension within the club. Not to mention that there was something going on with Zobelle that went beyond Mac's job.

But tonight was supposed to be a stress reliever, at least for the guys. There was a porno wrap party for Luann at CaraCara, and Mac and Tara were going. Mac expected Gemma to be there as well, for Luann, but who knew with her these days. Gemma and Tara were better now that Tara had come around to the club as well as Jax, though Gemma was hesitant to abandon her suspicions completely. Anyways, tonight should be interesting.

—

Mac had been to CaraCara before, but that night it was transformed. The sets, cameras, and other porn detritus was gone, and the place was decked out for a party. Mac linked her arm with Tara's, and walked across the room to the guys. Chibs greeted her with a kiss that made her toes curl. She wrapped an arm around him and just enjoyed his presence, letting the guys shoot the shit around her, not really paying attention.

What did catch her attention, though, was later, when one of the blonde porn stars - Ima, Luann had called her - was hanging all over Jax. Mac caught Gemma's eye, separating herself from Chibs and walking over.

"What's up, Gem?" Mac asked, actually wanting an answer. There was a look on the woman's face like she was trying to solve a problem with no clear answer, and Mac was tired of the snippy Gemma who was keeping a secret from everyone. Gemma pulled her to the side of the room. She looked nervous, which was slightly disconcerting. Gemma never got nervous.

"Look." she began. "I've only told Tara this, so you gotta keep it a secret. At least for now."

Mac nodded slowly, surprised that she was gonna come right out with it. It must be big for Gemma to be so open all of a sudden. Then she told Mac about the rape, and Mac forgot all about the biker queen being bitchy. It was horrifying, Gemma's story, and Mac came to realize that she absolutely hadn't gotten the worst of Zobelle and Weston's plans.

"Gemma." Mac said. But Gemma shook her head.

"I don't want pity, I don't want sympathy, and I can't tell the guys because they'll get themselves in trouble going after Weston and Zobelle, and Clay won't ever want to see me again, so you can't tell them either."

"Whoa, wait, Gemma that's way off base." Mac said. "I agree the guys would do something stupid, but to say that about Clay is wrong. He loves you, Gemma. You're is strong, beautiful confident, powerful wife, and he's not going to walk away because you were attacked by one of his enemies. If anything, that'll make him stand by your side. You aren't poisoned or spoiled or anything, you're a survivor, and that takes more strength than most women have. If I were Clay, I'd be proud to stand by your side."

Gemma's face lifted slightly. She looked like she was thinking about it.

"Yeah, well." she said, and Mac knew it wasn't going to be just her who convinced Gemma. But maybe she'd made an impact. She wasn't surprised when Gemma changed to subject to Ima, who was now rubbing on Jax like a cat in heat.

"The bitch couldn't try any harder." Gemma said. Mac snorted. She and Gemma watched carefully as Tara pulled Ima aside, having a conversation that clearly wasn't friendly. Ima got the last word and walked away, leaving Tara with a face that would cut glass.

"Tara's catfighting days aren't over." Gemma said, and Mac grinned.

"What, you got a plan?" she asked. Gemma nodded.

"Tara's gonna go to the bathroom. I'll get Jax there, you get Ima there… in a little while." Gemma said. "You never know what she might walk in on." Mac's grin grew as Gemma walked away. She watched Tara walk towards the bathroom and then Jax follow her. She paused a few minutes until Gemma gave her a nod, and then walked over to Ima.

"Hey, you're Ima, right?" Mac asked, playing nice with the porn star. The girl turned towards her, giving her a serious look of disdain. Clearly she didn't know her.

"What?" Ima asked.

"Jax wanted you." Mac said, trying to look earnest. "He's in the bathroom."

Ima gave her a half smile, and flounced off.

Mac walked back over to Gemma and waited. It didn't take long at all for Ima to come running from the direction of the bathroom, red-faced and angry. She looked towards Gemma and Mac, just as Chibs walked up and gave her a kiss on the cheek from behind. Mac just grinned at the porn star. Mac smiled at Gemma. Success.

Chibs, Gemma, and Mac talked for a while, until Luann came over and pulled Mac to the side, handing her an envelope.

"Is this what I think?" Mac asked. Luann nodded.

"Printed them today." Luann said. "The only copies are in here, and I deleted all the negatives. No evidence left. Enjoy." Luann winked at her and walked away.

Mac had gone the weekend before for a photoshoot at CaraCara, keeping the destination a secret from Chibs. It had been her, Luann, and a female assistant who'd helped with hair and makeup. They'd done a couple of shoots, but Mac's personal favorite was her, wrapped in only a Scottish flag. She was excited to give them to Chibs. She motioned him over; he was eyeing her and Luann curiously, and came quickly.

"Wha' was that about, luv?" he asked, eyeing the envelope in her hand. Mac handed it to him.

"If these get out anywhere, I will castrate you, Filip Telford, make no mistake." she said. "They are for you and you only." She gave him a dirty grin. "I'd also recommend you don't open them here." Chibs' eyes got dark. He wasn't an idiot, he knew what was in the envelope.

"Really?" he asked, gesturing slightly with the envelope.

Mac grinned. "Luann's a good friend." she said, and Chibs grinned too. He tucked the envelope in his kutte.

"Stay right here, luv." he said, voice gravelly. "We're leaving."

Mac just smiled and did as she was told.

—


	14. Chapter 13

**AN: Cue the** ** _dramaaaaa_** **and angst. Couldn't be all happy all the way through. Enjoy!**

Mac really loved riding with Chibs. Pressed close to him, with the adrenaline-filled sound of the bike beneath her and the wind all around her; it was an experience like no other. They were on their way to the Irish, technically this was a charity run but it was a cover for the gun-running operation that the Sons were running. Cameron had requested to see her again, and Clay was in no position to say no, so Mac was filled in on the details as brought along.

Mac was nervous again, because her last confrontation with Cameron had ended with a message that sounded a hell of a lot like it was from Peter. Mac couldn't think of a different reason why Cameron would want to see her. She also wasn't a fan of the way Chibs' eyes narrowed when Clay told them the news; like it was a personal offense to him rather than just a curiosity. It hadn't taken long for Mac to figure that these Irish were related to Jimmy O' and Chibs' past.

Either way, though, she was on her way to the Irish, and they were almost there. It was five minutes before they pulled off the road, got off the bikes, and were ushered in a black room. Cameron was there, as well as a younger man who must've been his son.

Mac stands back from the guys as they greet Cameron and his son, named Edmund. She keeps her eyes on Chibs, who looks a little like a caged animal. She doesn't really tune into the conversation until Edmund mentions some of the IRA bosses.

"Jimmy O', some o' the bosses migh' be coming stateside." he said in a heavy Irish accent, and Mac, as well as everyone else in the room, sees Chibs stiffen. The guys are all looking at him.

"Tiocfaidh ár lá." Chibs said, and Mac breaks out in goosebumps. _Their day will come_. Mac had heard Peter say the same thing, time and again, when talking about enemies and targets. _Jesus Christ._ It was almost too much of a coincidence to be Peter, though, so Mac tried to calm herself down until she could talk to Cameron. She wanted more information without giving herself away. If Peter had found her and was targeting the Sons, it would be important for her to not cause waves until she got her act together.

The Sons converged on the table a few minutes later, and Cameron left Edmund to give them the overview of their new gun-running operation. He walked over to Mac. She didn't miss the way Chibs' eyes narrowed at them, but she just shook her head lightly, warning him off. Best not to piss off the Irish.

"Hello, Mackenzie." Cameron said to her, and Mac gave him a polite nod. "Thanks for coming."

"Didn't have much of a choice." Mac said, and Cameron nodded.

"Well, I've go' another message from up above." Cameron said, and Mac indicated that he should continue. "You've already heard it, though. Chibs there said it just a few minutes ago. Tiocfaidh ár lá."

Mac tried to control her breathing, but the feeling of being watched was back. It was definitely Peter. Chibs saying it was a coincidence, but Peter had sent Cameron with that message specifically to give himself away.

"Why is he so interested in you?" Cameron asked. Mac shrugged.

"First of all, I don't know who he is, and if you don't either, than how am I supposed to answer that question?" she said. "I have no previous connections to the Irish, so I'm not really sure what's happening here. Perhaps your boss has me mistaken with someone else."

She walked way then, outside where the air was clearer, and just sat on Chibs' bike and waited for the guys. When they came out, loaded down with felt packs, Chibs walked over to her.

"Wha' did Cameron want?" he asked immediately. Mac just shook her head, pretending like it was nothing.

"To flirt." she said, deciding to play off of Chibs' mistrust for the man that was already in place. His eyes narrowed.

"Bloody mick." he growled. Mac took his face in her hands.

"Hey." she said softly. "You've got absolutely nothing to worry about, Filip." Chibs' eyes softened as he looked at her.

"Mac!" The prospect yelled for her, and Mac sighed.

"Duty calls." Mac said, but before she could walk away, Chibs swept her up into a hug and a toe-curling kiss. Mac was parting from the guys here - she had a job that was going to take her a fair bit away from Charming for a while. It could be weeks before she returned, so she allowed herself to say goodbye to Chibs. When they parted, she brushed his scars with her thumb.

"Be safe, Filip." she said.

"And you, luv." he replied. Then she turned, taking her back with her towards the bike that the prospect had driven up with them in the van. Mac waved once more to the guys, and then drove away.

—

** _a few weeks later**_

Mac had just walked in the door of her motel when her cell rang. Not the one she was using for the job or her prepaid, but her cell that everyone in Charming had. _Odd._ she thought. She'd given the club, Gemma, Tara, and Chibs fair warning. She might be gone a while, and while that fact had come true, they knew to limit contact. So it must've been important. Mac saw Tara's number, and flipped open the phone.

"Hey Tara, what's up?" she asked.

"Mac." Tara's voice was taught and Mac was immediately on alert.

"What's wrong?" Mac asked, shutting the door behind her and sitting down.

"It's Chibs." Mac's heart started to race.

"Tara, what happened?" she asked again.

"There was an explosion." Tara said slowly. Mac felt like she'd been hit by a hammer.

" _Oh god_ , Tara, is he…" Mac trailed off, not saying it.

"No, Mac, he's alive. He's just in critical condition. He was working on a van that exploded and he took a bad hit to the head when he got blown back. They have him in a coma right now." Tara said all this quickly.

"Tara, I… I can't leave right now." Mac said, and that was the truth of it. She was neck deep in this mission and leaving right now would get her in trouble with Tommy as well as possibly killed. And yet Chibs and her connection to him was pulling her to Charming with undeniable force. For a second Mac stepped back. This wasn't her. She didn't get attached like this. But then it became clear. This was _Chibs._ He knew everything about her; more than anyone, possibly including Tara. He was her partner, her lover, her confidante. She was in love with him.

 _Oh god._

"Mac, it's okay." Tara said. "He would understand."

"It's not okay." Mac said bitingly. Then she sighed. "Tara, please keep me updated. If I don't answer my phone, leave a message. I'll be back as soon as I can." And she hung up.

Mac sat in the chair for what felt like days, head in her hands, wondering when she'd let Chibs in as far as she had.

 _In love._

More than anything, she wanted to leave for Charming and hold vigil by Chibs' bedside. And then, of course, her phone rang again. It was the mission phone. Mac sighed, swallowing the lump in her throat made of tears, and slipped into her enforcer persona.

—

 _Hey Mac, it's Tara. Hope you're okay. Chibs is doing a lot better. He's not completely out of the woods, but we're pretty sure he's going to be fine. The rest of the guys, however, are in prison. They shot up a church fundraiser like a bunch of idiots. I won't say more than that until you get back. Gemma and Clay made up, which is making everything just a little better. Jax and Clay had a brawl over some club thing; I'm fairly sure it's just the climax of a bunch of tension between them, but after it they seemed better than they had in a while. I talked to Gemma about Jax's dad's manuscript, and she agreed with your perception of it. I still don't completely trust her, but I'm getting there Mac. So now were kind of holding the club together as best we can with Chucky and a few of the guys that weren't at the church. Anyways. Get back as soon as you can. Be safe._

 _—_

 _Mackenzie, it's Gemma. I assume you're still on vacation. Look, Fiona's back, and Chibs is awake and I wanted you to know. She's a conniving bitch, and I'm pretty sure she's angling for Chibs back so I felt like you should know. And also, if she's back, Jimmy O's not far behind. Get back as soon as you can. I'm doing my best to keep everything together but we could use you, Mac._

 _—_

Chibs was worried. Mac had been gone for a while, and completely out of contact since before his accident. She hadn't come to see him, and today was the day he was getting out. That wasn't her. Something was up. _She's on a job, man, chill out._ Then there was Fiona, and Chibs was certain that Gemma and Tara was keeping Mac updated, even if she wasn't responding. This wasn't how Chibs had wanted Fiona to come back into his life. _Damn._

They'd wheeled him out, and he'd greeted his brothers joyfully, gone back to the clubhouse, had a good time. And then Jimmy O' had made his presence known. Chibs had been pretty sure that he was in the States, thanks to Edmund and Fi. _Bastard._

There was a man with him that Chibs didn't recognize, and who didn't have an accent. He was tall, handsome in a cruel way, and kept look at Chibs like he knew him, which made Chibs wildly uncomfortable. Jimmy O' introduced him a Murphy before antagonizing Chibs about their past, and leaving with his thugs. _I'll kill you, bastard._

—

 _Mac, it's Tara. Happy got your signal; thanks for letting us know you're okay. Chibs was getting worried. He's fine, by the way, but Fiona is still here, along with Jimmy O' and his cronies. By the way, I saw Fiona kiss Chibs. I'm not sure what the context was, but I saw what I saw, and I thought you should know before you got back here. I wasn't sure I'd get a chance to tell you before you see them. Be safe, Mac, and hurry home._

Mac was frustrated. Charming was going to hell in a handbasket. First there's Chibs' accident, which had haunted Mac since Tara had called her. Then she'd had to go without contact for the sake of the mission, and she'd missed Chibs' recovery, Fiona's arrival, Jimmy O's arrival, and now Chibs' and Fiona's reunion. Her body wasn't sure whether to be cold with fear or hot with fury. If Chibs had lied to her all those times he told her he and Fiona were over, Mac wasn't sure what she'd do. But there was nothing for it right now. She was enforcer-Mac right now. Other emotions couldn't come in to play. But it took all her training to repress them.

—

It took a couple of days, but eventually she was done. It was a successful completion, and Ma was free to leave for Charming. She'd never been so happy to be driving back to that town. She pulled into Teller-Morrow, and found it empty.

 _Weird._

The guys must've been on club business. She wondered where the girls were. Shrugging it off, she drove to Jax's house next, looking for Tara to find out what the hell was going on. The first sign that something was off was the ajar front door. Mac checked she had her weapons and parked a little away so as not to arouse suspicion. The door creaked open when she pushed it.

There they were. Cameron holding Abel, Tara sobbing on the floor in front of him, Half-Sack between them. Mac ran at them before she really knew what she was doing. She went for Cameron, trying to hit him without hurting Abel, and Half-Sack did the same thing. Mac must've made contact, because Cameron came away with a bruise on his face. But he'd also grabbed the knife off her waist and buried it in Half-Sack's gut.

"Kip!" Tara yelled and he fell, putting pressure on the wound immediately. "Kip, you're gonna be find, hold on." Mac glanced down and then turned back to Cameron, who was now holding the knife to Abel.

"A son for a son." he says, before dropping the knife. Mac only has a second to be confused before Cameron has grabbed the front of her shirt and pulled her to him.

"You." he said to her. "But for you're _friend,_ you'd be mine." He kissed her then, and Mac recoiled with her whole body, trying not to hurt Abel. _Get off of me, you rat bastard, I'm not your's and I'm absolutely not Peter's._

When he let her go, Mac spat in his face. "Fuck off." she said simply. Cameron just grinned at her.

"Your friend will see you soon, Mackenzie." he said, and then threw her against the wall with all his might. Mac's head hit the wall with a crack, and everything went dark.

—

The throbbing in her head was the first thing she felt. Then a rocking.

"Mac?" It was Tara's voice. Mac groaned.

"Oh thank god, you're awake." Mac opened her eyes to find she was in the back of a van, Tara next to her, and Opie driving.

"What?" Mac asked, mind fuzzy.

"Cameron took Abel, and Half-Sack got stabbed. Do you remember?" Tara asked, and Mac nodded. It was coming back to her now.

"Good. We're on our way to the docks, Cameron's headed for a boat. The guys are racing him there." Tara said. Mac thought she was remarkably put together for what had just happened. Mac sat up, trying to suppress the throbbing in her head so she could participate in what was about to happen next.

But they were too late.

Mac, Tara, and Opie came running down the docks just as Jax sank to his knees, yelling his grief to the air, Cameron staring from the deck of a boat chugging away. Mac felt the loss like a punch to the gut, stumbling and almost falling when they finally reached the guys. Jax stood up, rushing to Tara.

"Tara, what the hell happened?" he asked wildly. "Why is my son gone?" He was in shock, Mac thought, and terrified. He wasn't thinking clearly. Tara clearly noticed as well, and took him off to the side to talk to him quietly.

Chibs was devastated. Jax's son, gone. And at the hands of the IRA. The same bastards that had ruined his life were now doing the same for Jax. _Goddamn bloody micks._

He watched as Tara, Mac, and Opie ran down the docks just too late, and was glad to see Mac alive. What he hadn't expected was the spike of anger he felt when he saw her. He watched as Tara took Jax aside, listening for what he could hear of their conversation.

"…Mac showed up…" "…cameron stabbed Kip with her knife…" "…then kissed her, told her her IRA friend would see her again soon, whoever that is…"

Chibs' sight went red. First, she misses his accident and his long recovery. She's not there at all while he's in the hospital; doesn't even call. Then there's Cameron. The mick had been flirting with her for a while, but Chibs had never thought Mac would return the affections. Apparently he was wrong. And now she'd essentially gotten the prospect stabbed and she was planning to meet up with him again? Who else could the friend be?

Mac went to Chibs, giving him a hug. When he didn't return it, she stepped back, wary.

"Where the hell have you been?" Chibs asked, voice quiet and laced with danger. Mac felt her hackles go up. Was he angry with her?

"On a job, Chibs, you know that." she said.

"Really?" he asked acidly. The whole group was paying attention to their conversation now. "Or have you been helping the Irish behind our backs?" he asked, and Mac recoiled. _How dare he?_

"What the fuck, Chibs?" she asked.

"See, it looks kind of like this, _luv_." The endearment was mocking, and Mac felt anger start to build in her gut. "It looks like you and Cameron were together - I always knew he was flirting with you with all the requests to talk to you, but I never thought you'd return it. It looks like you left at an opportune time to help the Irish fuck everything up here. Why didn't you come back when I got blown the fuck up?" Chibs was yelling by the end of it.

"I was on a job, Filip." Mac's voice was quiet. She wouldn't yell.

"Yeah, sure. You weren't helping out my replacement, Cameron? That's not how Half-Sack ended up stabbed with your knife? Not how Jax's son ended up in Cameron's hands? He kissed you tonight, right? I heard Tara tell Jax. Your next move is to what? Go find him in Ireland? Start a happy family with the IRA?" Mac wasn't sure whether she hated the anger or the disgust in his voice more.

"Whether you believe me or not, I was on a job. The day after your accident, I was forced to leave behind all communication. Breaking that barrier would've risked my mission and my life. Thought I still got voicemails. I heard all about your reunion with your wife. Guess you reconnected while I was away. Does this happen every time I leave, Chibs? Do you reconnect with some crow eater? I was on a job. Don't believe me?"

Mac pulled out the letter she'd picked up from Happy, who'd been worried about her. She handed it to Jax. Then she pulled up her shirt, showing the whole group a nice new slice across her back that she'd gotten during the mission.

"That's a letter from Happy. He was worried about me. And this lovely new scar to add to my collection. You bastard, Filip. I was on a job. This is my thing, Chibs, I thought you could accept that. I accept you for who you are. SAMCRO is my family. I didn't come looking for it, but it's my family. I'm not going to betray family, asshole. I'm not working for the Irish. Cameron grabbed me and kissed me against my will. Was Fiona kissing you against yours? When he was done, he threw my against the wall and knocked me out. It was bad luck that he got his hand on my knife. I didn't help him with Abel. He had the kid in his arms when I walked in. Tara can attest to all of this. If you'd listened to the entire conversation, perhaps you'd've heard that."

"As for you and me, Chibs, I'm in love with you. I've never been in love with anyone. I cannot believe, after all you know of my past and I know of yours, that you think I would betray you with a member of the IRA. Idiot. You know what else? Tiocfaidh ár lá. You know who used to say that to me? Peter. He's the friend Cameron was talking about. He's trying to ruin me and SAMCRO by helping the Irish. Peter Murphy. the man who almost ruined me. I wouldn't be surprised if he was with Jimmy O' this whole time. Cameron's been giving me hints that it's Peter, but I honestly didn't believe or want to believe it until now. How dare you accuse me of giving up Abel on purpose? How dare you accuse me of helping the Irish? How dare you accuse me of sleeping with someone else? By the way, that makes you the biggest fucking hypocrite ever, reconnecting with Fiona after assuring me that you didn't love her anymore? That she was only your wife in name? Fuck off."

Mac realized all of a sudden that she had a very rapt audience. She wasn't sure what had suddenly caused Chibs' mistrust, though she supposed it only appeared sudden to her. He look - as he should - more contrite than he had a minute ago, but Mac wasn't having it. She turned to the guys, deciding to finish her story once and for all.

"Peter Murphy was a fellow solider of mine when I was in the military. We ended up dating, and we were happy for a while, but he always had control of the relationship. Eventually, he used me to kill a woman he had raped and her child; his daughter. I didn't know who the targets were until after they were dead. I didn't know they were a woman and a child until after they were dead. And believe me, I have never forgotten. I left Peter as soon as I could, but realistically I ran, and it was only a matter of time until he caught me. I sometimes wonder if I didn't stop in Charming to drawn him to me so I could end this. Look, I'll understand if you never want anything to do with me again. What I did was heinous, and I can never make up for it. I just want you to know who is probably working with Jimmy O'."

She turned to Jax next.

"I have no words. I'm sorry that I couldn't do more to save Abel. I'm sorry I failed when he needed me most, and I'm sorry…" Mac turned to the rest of the group now, tears clear in her eyes. "I'm sorry that Kip had to die. So, now you know the full story. I'm going to leave, now. I haven't been home in weeks and I need… I just need to go. I'm sorry I failed you."

And she walked away. She left Chibs and the look on his face that made her heart hurt. She was flanked by Tara and Gemma, who both gave Chibs scathing looks as they walked away. Thought Mac didn't see it, Chibs had never seen his brothers look angrier at him. He felt like the thundercloud of anger in his mind had collapsed like a cloud of feathers. It was gone. Mac was right. Where had the sudden mistrust come from? _Fiona._ That made Chibs feel even worse, probably because it was true. Mac had been on a job. She'd been honest with him from the beginning. She'd tried to turn him away. And after everything, he'd accused her of cheating, or helping the Irish take Abel when he knew damn well they were capable of doing that on their own. She'd looked so sad, so broken. He'd never seen her like that. How he wanted to run after her, but for the wall of his own brothers blocking his way.

 _I'm in love with you._

She'd been so open about the admission. He'd honestly wondered if he'd ever hear the words from her, and then there they were. And oh how he wanted to return them. Wanted to act on them. Wanted to show her just how much he felt for her. But he'd fucked it all up. Maybe the best thing that had ever happened to him, and he'd taken her heart and stomped on it.

Fuck.

—


	15. Chapter 14

**AN: Thank you guys for all the kind reviews! It's fun to see you react along with the story. Never fear, I'm a happy endings kind of girl, but there had to be a little angst along the way. This chapter will continue that. I suspect this all gets a little melodramatic at points, but it's what I feel like writing, so bear with me. We're going to move through Ireland pretty quickly; I don't want to get bogged down in the details of the show. I have the ending of this story planned out, and I'm planning a continuation if I want to, so stay tuned. Anyways, on to Ireland. Enjoy!**

Mac knew physical pain. It had happened often enough that she knew it like a best friend. Physical pain she could handle. Physical pain was easy. This emotional pain she was feeling? Terrifying. Horrible. Never-ending.

It had been a little over a week since their fight on the docks. Abel was being tracked - Tara kept her up to date. The club was in hot water elsewhere too - Gemma was in the hospital, though Tara hadn't told her why. Mac figured it had something to do with the Irish. Tara, Gemma, Donna, and Luann had really be supportive the past few days. Not to mention the rest of the guys, who Mac was shocked to find were taking her side. Chibs was still their brother, of course, he was being given that courtesy. But they felt for Mac.

She knew Chibs wanted to apologize. But she just couldn't let him. Every time she thought of him her chest burned, and if she going to look at him, much less speak to him again, she needed to get over that first.

And so when Clay had come around, asking her to come to Belfast with them, Mac had hesitated. Chibs would be there, not to mention his wife, his daughter, and all of SAMBEL. That was a lot of Chibs to be surrounded by. But her guilt at losing Abel had outweighed that particular fear, and Mac had agreed. And so she was in her truck, on her way to the clubhouse.

It was crowded when she arrive, which made sense, the majority of the club was going halfway across the world on a rescue mission. Mac parked and hopped out, bringing her duffle with her along with a few weapons. Clay had told her not too many, and preferably not guns. But Mac wasn't going to Ireland without her a little firepower.

She was greeted by Jax and Juice. Juice was puppy dog happy, as usual, and Mac quickly fell into an easy banter with the two of them.

"You ever been to Ireland, Mac?" Juice asked, throwing her bag in one of the vans. Mac nodded.

"For work and play." Mac said.

"Is it beautiful?" Juice asked, and Mac grinned at him.

"It is." she said. "In a way that's specific to Ireland. But then again, that's true about every country." Juice nodded. Mac's had noticed Chibs immediately, and was steadfastly ignoring him. She hadn't counted on how much it hurt all of a sudden to see him again. There was too much to this trip though; Abel was more important than her failed relationship. Mac swallowed the pain back and focused on anything else.

Mac was joking with Tig when Gemma pulled up, and then it was like a fire drill. They were in the vans and driving away before Mac could really take a breath. Apparently Gemma had had to be illegally rescued from the hospital, and they needed to catch their plane before anyone found out. Mac gave Tara and Donna, as well as Tig a hug goodbye, and hopped in the front seat of the second van. Opie was driving, and he and Mac shot the shit on the way to the airport.

Chibs was in pain. The truth was he'd been in pain since the scene on the dock, but this was something new. Seeing her again was killing him slowly, and as she talked and laugh with Opie in the front seat, he wondered briefly if this was some new form of torture. The problem was that his window may have closed. She wasn't speaking to him and he honestly didn't blame her, but as soon as they landed in Ireland, his responsibility would be to Kerrianne and Fi and keeping them safe from Jimmy O'. It was Chibs' hope that this trip would end with Jimmy dead. And that was going to take all his focus. He sighed and let his head drop back against the rest, eyes closing.

—

Ireland was darker than Mac remembered it. Maybe it was the location, but it was like someone had taken a blanket and shrouded the country. The clubhouse was essentially an Irish version of the SAMCRO clubhouse, and Mac was given a room right next to Gemma. She'd mostly stayed with the biker queen as the guys greeted their brothers overseas. She was briefly introduced, but was trying to keep a low profile. Mac didn't need anything else to complicate her life. She was here for Abel.

That didn't stop the pain though. She met McGee and O'Neill, the Pres and VP of SAMBEL, as well as Padraic, and Mac didn't need anyone to tell her that this was Chibs' nephew.

"Your Cait's son." Mac said without thinking as she shook his hand, and Padraic nodded. "I'm Mackenzie."

"Proper Scottish name you go' there lass." he said, and Mac grinned at him.

"Or something." she said.

"No' a proper Scottish accent though." he said. "British, but more specifically… I can't tell."

"No where in particular." Mac said. "I've been around the country."

Padraic nodded and wandered over to Chibs. Mac was just close enough to pick up on their conversation.

"Where are they?" Chibs asked. Mac assumed he was asking about Fiona and Kerrianne.

"With Father Ashby, at St. Matt's rectory. They're fine, away from Jimmy and safe." Padraic said, and Mac saw the immense relief sweep over Chibs like a wave. Her breath caught in her throat. _He still loves her, and not in the way he once told me._ Mac thought. _That relief isn't just for Kerrianne._

Mac averted her eyes and walked away. She was happy for him, really, she was. He was going to get the chance to reconnect with his daughter. That was amazing. But every time it was presented to her, it felt like someone was driving a stake into her heart deeper and deeper.

There was discussion once they got to the inside of the clubhouse on the purpose of having the group from SAMCRO pulled over by crooked cops on the way through Ireland. The one they had interrogated had told them he was paid by someone to detain and deport a group of Americans, and Mac had a pretty good idea who.

"It's Peter." she said. She was sitting on the bar, only half a part of the conversation. The guys from SAMCRO were still trying to get the guys from SAMBEL to accept that a girl - no matter her qualifications - was privy to club business, and had actually been brought to help. The group turned to her.

"Peter and Jimmy together, I would expect." she said, making eye contact with McGee and O'Neill, neither of whom she really trusted.

"I agree." Clay spoke up, and Jax nodded beside him. "Thought I don't understand how it fits into their plan, whatever that is. If they didn't want us here, they shouldn't have drawn us here."

Mac agreed. It was weird. But before the guys could get any deeper into it, Gemma came running in.

"They're here." she said, and Mac felt a swoop in her stomach. Gemma was talking about Kerrianne and Fiona, who were coming for a visit. The group wandered outside, and Mac made sure to stand off well to the side.

It was incredibly emotional. Mac saw Fiona first; proud, beautiful, and strong. Not a woman to be messed with. Then Kerrianne, who looked simultaneously terrified and hopeful, which Mac could only believe was acceptable for the situation the girl was in. She was pretty as well - _she looks like him_ -, and kept her eyes trained on Chibs from the minute she got out of the van. They were followed by a pretty girl who was introduced as Trinity.

There was a pregnant pause. And then Chibs rushed forward, saying "My girls." Mac could hear the relief in his voice, as well as the pure sadness and pain. Mac kept watching, the lump in her throat getting larger. As Chibs got closer to his family, he got farther from Mac. But he deserved this. They'd been taken from his so cruelly and his family deserved a chance. Mac walked inside, and Gemma followed her.

In silence, Mac poured herself three hits of whatever whisky was behind the bar, and took them like water. Gemma just watched in silence. When Mac was done, she let herself be pulled off to the side, into a corner, as the guys brought Fi and Kerrianne in. Fiona had some questions she needed to answer. As they listen in to the conversation, Fiona's strength is once again displayed to Mac. The woman is fierce and surprising. Even more so when she calls to Mac by name.

"You're Mackenzie, right?" The SAMCRO guys go still, and the look on Chibs' face would've been priceless, had Mac looked. As it was, she made eye contact with Fiona and nodded once. Mac stood up, walking over to the group. She put on as blank of a mask as she could muster, relying on all the training she'd ever had. Fiona was strong, yes, but Mac was at least her equal.

"I've met Peter." Fi said. Mac just blinked at her. "He's no' a nice guy." That made Mac snort.

"Understatement." she said shortly, but the laugh had broken the ice. The corner of Fi's mouth was turned up.

"Aye, well, when ya add Jimmy in ta tha' equation, it gets worse." Fi continued. Mac nodded again.

"Peter's megalomaniacal." Mac said.

"I can't argue with tha'." Fiona said. "Needless to say, we agree they aren't good apart, and they're worse together." she said, turning back to the guys.

The conversation changed tacks, and once it was clear to Mac that she wasn't needed anymore, she left the room for her bedroom. She wanted quiet for a little while.

—

It was commotion downstairs that drew her out of her nap. Mac rubbed her eyes; she hadn't meant to sleep that long, but here she was. She hopped out of bed quickly, rushing downstairs to see what the fuss was.

It was Chibs and Jax, sitting at the bar, bruised and bleeding. If Clay hadn't been asking them what the fuck had happened, Mac would've done it for him.

"Someone shot at us while we were getting the girls there." Jax said, as Chibs took a shot beside him. "Girls are fine, though. We're a little banged up, but alright."

Mac realized she was staring at Chibs, as if her world had narrowed to just him. A cowardly part of her was glad she hadn't had to see him in the hospital when he'd been blown up, because it might've destroyed her. To see him even slightly injured now, was throwing her for a loop. Mac knew part of her happiness would always be tied to Chibs and his wellbeing. Their fight didn't mean she wouldn't be devastated if he were to die.

He'd tried exactly once to talk to her; when they'd been on the ferry over. He'd said her name, and Mac had quite simply walked away. She wasn't ready. And now her was home with his family, and his attentions were otherwise devoted. The mix of anger, pain, and sadness in Mac was like poison. She shook her head, and unwilling to stay in his presence any longer, left for the liquor bottle upstairs.

That's where she stayed until the party really got into full swing. The noise was absurd, and Mac figured that instead of failing to sleep through it, she might as well go join in. Joining in for her meant sitting on a picnic table away from the crowd with a couple beers, but at least she was outside.

The SAMCRO guys had tried to come up and make conversation. Happy hung with her a little while, only to be replaced by Juice and Jax at different moments over the hours. But Mac went relatively unnoticed until Seamus, one of the SAMBEL guys, decided to come over an play nice.

"Mackenzie lass!" He was yelling, but Mac didn't think he knew that. He was stumbling drunk as most of the guys were.

"Com'ere." he said, sitting down next to her and pulling her to him with one arm. They sat like that for a few seconds, and Mac wondered if he'd passed out leaning on her. Then his hand moved up, cupping the back of her head and trying to bring it to his crotch. Mac recoiled.

"The fuck darlin'?" the Irishman yelled. "Come back 'ere and take care o' me."

"No." Mac said. "I don't think so." Seamus got angry.

"Who'd'ya think ya are?" He stumbled towards her, slurring his words. Mac put her hand up to stop him, but then Happy was there, having noticed the commotion, Juice beside him. The two SAMCRO guys restrained Seamus, who was getting increasingly angry.

"Wha' the fuck, man? He was yelling at Happy now, and Juice and Happy were drunk enough to start yelling back.

"She's not a crow eater, Seamus!" Juice yelled. "Stay the fuck away from her!"

"Oh, not jus' a nice piece o' ass the SAMCRO guys are protectin' for yerselves, no?"

"Hey, dipshit, she's scarier than me sometimes." Happy said, and the conversation pretty much devolved from there. Mac was weirdly pleased with Happy's assessment of her, but less pleased when they decided she had to prove it. Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was her anger at Chibs or the dark environment of Ireland but somehow she ended up wrapping her fists and getting into the ring with O'Neill.

The party had gathered around. The sober part of Mac was sure that this was a bad idea, but the drunk and angry part of her only had to see Chibs out of the corner of her eye to feel her blood boil again. And she let it. She didn't try to stop the anger, didn't let it fade to pain and sadness. Instead, she took the feeling out on O'Neill, who surely didn't deserve it, but was the person who put himself in the ring with her. She hadn't yelled at Chibs that day on the docks. She had contained her anger. Not anymore.

She dropped the mask she'd been wearing since the fight. Her anger exploded across her face; she could feel it as her lips curled and her eyes narrowed. Her blood rushed, her face and ears burned, and for a second every now and then, O'Neill's face became Chibs' face. He fought back, of course, and Mac got a little beat up as well, but he was no match for the pure anger that Mac was working with. The cheers and jeers of their audience faded to a buzz and they fought. Until Mac, with a well-placed punch pushed O'Neill on to the barrier, and he collapsed.

Mac fell back as the cheering faded to whispering. It was clear O'Neill was done and that Mac had won. She licked where her lip had split, feeling the sting. She unwrapped her hands, leaving the now bloody wraps hanging on the side of the ring. She caught O'Neill's eye, giving him a nod which he feebly returned, and without further ado, hopped out of the rings and went back to her room. She'd had enough of a party.

—

Mac was sorer than she'd been in a while the next morning, not to mention fairly hungover. That didn't stop Jax from grinning at her when he ambled down for breakfast.

"Good morning bombshell!" he said, slightly too loudly. Mac glared at him.

"It's nice to see you express emotion again." Jax said. "Even if it was while beating the shit out of O'Neill." Jax held out a fist for a bump, but Mac just strengthened her glare.

"Look." Jax said, sitting down next to her. "I need you to come with me when I visit Father Ashby today."

Mac looked at him carefully. She almost asked why before reevaluating. He wouldn't ask if it wasn't important. So she just nodded.

"Ok." If Jax was surprised she didn't ask why, he hid it well.

"Thanks Mac." he said instead. "We'll leave within an hour."

—

They met in the church proper. Mac was quiet as Jax introduced her to Father Ashby, who eyed her as if he already knew who she was. The hairs on the back of Mac's neck stood up.

"Mackenzie Torrel." he said, and Mac just looked at him impassively.

"Where's my son, Father?" Jax asked, diverting the Father's gaze.

"He's safe." Ashby said, but turned back to Mac. "I'm more interested in your end of things, Mackenzie. You know Peter Murphy, correct?"

"What's it to you?" Mac asked. Ashby pursed his lips.

"Peter joined Jimmy a couple of months ago. He has past IRA ties - born and raised here in Belfast. Family was involved so he got involved. When he left for the States, we thought we'd never hear from him again. He came back with an American accent and on the trail of one Mackenzie Torrel. Now, he's convinced Jimmy that you and the Sons are his enemies, and that dovetails with Jimmy's plans to end the IRA's relationship with the Sons so he can keep more money for himself."

Mac swore under her breath. It had been sitting right in front of her. Peter _Murphy._ It was in his last name. He'd never talked much about the childhood - hell, Mac hadn't known where he'd been born until now. Peter was both smart and lucky, it turned out. Mac eyed Jax, and he nodded, understanding that she hadn't known this.

"Why are you telling me this, Father?" Jax asked when it became clear that Mac wasn't going to respond.

Ashby sighed. "The army council wants them gone." he said. "They're more trouble than they're worth. But I can't kill 'em, and neither can any other leader. It'd be chaos. You two have excuses for wanting 'em dead."

Mac looked at Jax appraisingly. There was quiet for a moment before Ashby was called over by a church official.

"I've gotta call Stahl." Jax said.

"Why?" Mac asked, though she sort of already knew the answer.

"Do you trust me?" Jax asked, looking at her evenly. Mac let the question hang for a moment, before nodding.

"Then don't ask me that again." he said. "You're the only one who knows right now. Keep quiet. I'm not a rat."

"Why're you telling me?" Mac asked.

"I need someone to watch my back." he said, standing up and walking outside. Mac stayed in the pew, appreciating the dead silence of the church. She wanted Peter dead, and it looked as if that was the way this was going. It also looked like Peter and Jimmy were a matched set. Going after Peter meant a serious risk of death, for her and for those that Jimmy held in his grasp - namely Fiona and Kerrianne.

Mac sighed, standing up and following Jax. She would leave it up to the club, for now.

—

Leaving it up to the club had resulted in an interesting plan. The Sons were planning a gun drop that supposedly Jimmy and Peter would be at, so they'd decided to wait for them there. Mac thought it was a brute force plan, but it couldn't hurt to try. She had been asked by Jax to stay behind. Gemma, Kerrianne, Fiona, Trinity, and Maureen were all in Maureen's apartment, and he wanted her there for safety. She kissed him on the cheek and told him to be safe.

It was one of the more awkward groups she'd been a part of in a while. Trinity had gone down to watch the store, so it was her, Gemma, Kerrianne, Maureen, and Fiona. The temperature would go up five degrees every time Gemma or Fiona decided to glare at one another. Kerrianne looked like she'd rather be anywhere else, and Mac was tight like a spring. There was something bad in the air.

So she should't've been surprised when the door smashed open and Peter and Jimmy walked in. Mac's heart just about stopped in her chest. There's a frozen moment where Mac can't breathe when Peter's eyes lock with hers. The cruel look on his face melts away and for a second Mac recognizes the Peter she thought he was. Then he walks towards her, grabs her arm, and drags her to the bedroom.

Mac swears, but there's nothing she can do until he slams the door shut behind them and lets her go.

"Mackie." he says, and the hairs on the back of Mac's neck go up.

"What is this, Peter?" she asked.

"I've found you." he said. "Finally. I've been looking for you since you left. You can't understand how much it hurt to find you gone."

Mac just looked impassively at him.

"Mackie, I'm sorry." Peter said. "I did, forced you, it was terribly, and I'm sorry Mackie, I just want you back."

Mac squashes the initial shock at his first apology, and tries to force her brain to work. It was clear that he wasn't actually sorry, and Mac wouldn't've cared if he was. But, it wasn't inconceivable that he wanted her back. She had run away. Mac got the distinct feeling that if she said no like she wanted to, she'd end up dead. But she couldn't say yes either. She sighed, letting her shoulders collapse.

"Peter." she said, letting her voice infuse with happiness. "I've waiting so long for you. But I need time to think. There are some loose ends I have to clear up so, when I do say yes, we can live free from anyone."

Mac felt the words burn as she said them, but she was a good actor, and Peter bought it. He hugged her to him before bringing her in for a kiss, which Mac bore without passion.

"Thank god." Peter said. "I'll give you your time; I'm just so happy to have you back, Mackie!" He left the bedroom excitedly, and Mac followed.

This trick would save her life. As long as Peter thought she still wanted him, his desire for her would protect her from him or Jimmy's wrath. It was now a matter of how long she could keep him fooled.

Jimmy was having what looked like a very one-sided conversation in the kitchen.

"Well well." he said when he saw Mac. "If it isn't the other woman." Mac kept her face blank.

"Fi, this is Chibs' new piece." Out of the corner of her eye, Mac say Fiona's face remain impassive as well. She'd known.

"That's over." Mac said, more for Peter's sake than for anyone else. Mac didn't want him to think that anyone was going to 'come between them' now. Best keep the charade up.

Jimmy raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, sure." he said. "Clearly I haven't done a good enough job destroying his life. Good thing he's back." Mac felt anger burn in her chest. Jimmy was an arrogant bastard, and every word he said increased Mac's hatred. The look on his face almost snapped the last of Mac's self-control, but before she could attack him, he brought Michael front and center. Jimmy and Peter had brought Michael with them, and now the purpose of that was clear. Jimmy's gun fired, and Michael was dead before he hit the ground.

Kerrianne screamed, and hid behind her mom, and Trinity burst through the door up from the shop, stopping suddenly when she saw the scene in front of her. She did have the foresight to bring a gun, though, which Mac grabs from her in the small scuffle, and catching Jimmy by surprise, manages to get him pinned, pointing the gun at him. Gemma had gotten to Peter.

Jimmy keeps taunting her about Chibs, but for whatever reason, Mac doesn't shoot. It'd be so easy to end this now.

"Shut up." she growled. "Shut the _fuck_ up."

Peter came to her defense. "Shut up, Jimmy. Tá sí le linn."

Mac, Jimmy, and Fi are the only three who understand the Irish, and Mac takes a split second, while Jimmy is looking at Peter, to catch Fi's eye and given her a small shake of the head. No need to have Fi trying to kill her over a misunderstanding. As long as Peter believed it, of course.

"Oh really?" Jimmy drawled, and Peter nodded. Jimmy looked back at Mac, who said "Tá mé." I am. Then she put a finger to her lips, telling him to keep it quiet. She cocked the gun, preparing to shoot. It was Fiona that broke it.

"Mackenzie, you can't kill him." Fiona said.

"Why the hell not?" Mac asked without taking her eyes from Peter.

"If you kill him, that's it for everyone you love. It'll be a goddamn bloodbath." There was genuine fear in Fiona's words, which is what eventually convinced Mac. Fiona wasn't a woman who was scared of a lot of things. Best to listen to her.

"Fine." she said. "But Jimmy, if you ever go near Chibs or his family again, I'll blow your head off."

Mac let Jimmy up and motioned for Gemma to do the same for Peter. This actually worked out well for her little plan. Peter would think she was doing this partially for him. What had she gotten herself into?

—


	16. Chapter 15

**AN: And so the angst continues. Chapters might be a little slow after this; I'm still trying to write the ending. Enjoy! :)**

The mood in the clubhouse was somber. First, the guys had come back to hear about Jimmy and Peter's little visit. Then, the women had been informed of the truck explosion. They'd already known that Jimmy and Peter weren't going to be at the gun sale, because they'd been with them. But the explosion was new. Mac was relieved to find that none of the Charming Sons had been killed.

The look in Chibs' eyes, however, after she'd learned of Padraic's death, made her want to go to him. She was at the bar drinking a beer, listening to the murmurs from the group of Sons who were mourning their losses. Mac was half paying attention, perking up a little when she heard mention of the Ulster loyalists, the UVF. It seemed the SAMBEL leadership was blaming the UVF for the explosion, but Mac wasn't so sure.

Eventually once the Sons separated a bit, Mac wandered over to Jax.

"Hey VP." she said, bumping their shoulders.

"Hey Mac." he said. "Sorry about today."

She shook her head. "I think you have more cause to be upset than I do."

"You had to see Peter though." Jax said. "That couldn't've been easy."

Mac shrugged. "Not my favorite day." she said. "But look, I've had another thought." Jax looked at her.

"The UVF." she continued. "I really don't think they're your looking in the right place there."

Jax gave her a confused look. "Well where should we look, Mac?" he asked.

"I don't want to step on any toes, but I'd start within yourselves." she said. "Within SAMBEL. Something's wrong here."

The look on Jax's face made her move to stand up and walk away a wise one. She hadn't wanted to sow discord, but she did want to plant the seed. She didn't trust SAMBEL leadership. Her instincts told her something was wrong. The bombing set up, the shooting, Jimmy and Peter knowing where they were. It was all too easy.

A few minutes later another argument erupted off to the side.

"I'm no' leavin' ya!" Chibs was saying, albeit loudly. Mac turned in her seat to watch. A group of Sons had surrounded Chibs.

"You should take your girls and go while you can!" Jax said, but Chibs shook his head.

"I'll no' say it again." he said, and for a brief moment, his eyes caught Mac's. She was briefly surprised by the squeeze of her heart, but managed to suppress it. "I'm no' leavin'." And as quickly as his eyes had met hers, they were gone.

She nursed a beer for a little while longer, thinking about the feeling in her chest. The anger was dissipating with time. She'd known that would happen. It was mostly sadness that encompassed her now. She spent most of the rest of the time downstairs watching Happy tattoo Kerrianne's name over Chibs' heart. Again, as any mention of Kerrianne normally did, Mac felt a mix of happy and sad. Once the blood and excess ink had been washed off Chibs' chest, Mac downed the rest of her beer and left for bed. It had been a long day.

—

The morning turned out not to be much better. Mac had gone to the bathroom downstairs, and on her way back to the bar for breakfast, heard voices, and decided to stand back. It was O'Neill and someone else, and the hairs on the back of Mac's neck stood straight up. She listened hard.

"…can't let anyone find out." Mac heard the other voice and didn't recognize it.

"No shit." said O'Neill. "Look, I don't feel good about it, but Clay's kid is asking questions. I'm getting outta here. You might think about doing the same. I'll be at the loft on the docks."

Mac heard a sound like a hand hitting a shoulder and heavy booted footsteps. She walked back to the bathroom quickly and waited a few minutes before walking back into the main room. O'Neill was gone, and Jax was sitting at the bar, coffee in his hands.

"Morning Jax." she said quietly, sitting down next to him.

"Hey Mac." Mac could hear something off in his voice.

"What's wrong?" she asked. Jax sighed.

"Talked to Ashby again." he said. "Told him that we thought Jimmy and Peter might be behind the bombing and the shooting. I think you might be right about the UVF. He said he needs proof, and I might have a way to get it, but it's not good. Speaking of, have you seen O'Neill?"

Now it was Mac's turn to sigh. "Yeah, I have. That's why I came over here to talk to you. I over heard a conversation this morning between O'Neill and someone whose voice I didn't recognize. He admitted to it. He's working for Peter and Jimmy. He's gone, said something about a loft by the docks. I'm sorry, Jax."

Jax briefly looked angry, but then his face was taken over by pure exhaustion. He rubbed his hand over it.

"Well, let's go find the dirty bastard." he said, getting up to rouse the guys.

—

They made it to the loft with no problem. It was apparently a well known safe house. And there was O'Neill, now strung up and at the mercy of Sean Casey, who was rivaling Happy and Mac for his bloodlust. Mac was standing off to the side, watching Casey work impassively, as well as keeping an eye on McGee. She had the niggling feeling that McGee was the other man in the room with O'Neill, but having no confirmation, she had to settle to keeping and eye on him.

She had to hand it to Casey, though, he did good work. It wasn't too long until he had O'Neill admitting that Jimmy and Peter ordered the bombing. He also fingered McGee in the process, so Mac wasn't around to hear the last of his confession, having shot after McGee when he ran. They cornered him on the roof.

Juice was the first to notice that Jimmy, Peter, and a whole group of cronies were walking towards the loft.

"You were the other person in the room." Mac called to McGee. He was looking for an escape route, and needed a distraction.

"What?" he asked, successfully distracted.

"You were the one O'Neill was talking to." Mac said. McGee's face went hard, and Mac knew she was right. The Sons took care of it from there.

When Peter and Jimmy made it to the roof, Mac made a practical decision. She had her guns with her, and was perfectly capable of joining in the ensuing firefight, but instead she made sure to catch Peter's eye as she hid behind a vent. Best to continue the charade.

On the way back to the clubhouse, her mind was consumed with similar thoughts. Perhaps if she could convince Peter that Abel wasn't worth it, she could trade herself for Jax's son. She'd be okay, given that she could keep up the charade. Plus it might give the guys a moment in which to kill Jimmy. That would be good for Chibs.

She felt like she was running in circles. She'd been responsible for Abel's kidnapping, and getting him back would make Jax happy, plus she owed that. Then there was Chibs, who had blamed her for Abel's kidnapping in the first place, and she wanted him to have his revenge against Jimmy while keeping his family safe.

Too much. It was all too much. Mac grabbed a bottle of Jameson and escaped to her room as soon as they returned to the clubhouse, Jax victoriously clutching the incriminating tape of O'Neill fingering Jimmy and Peter.

 _At least one good thing came out of today._

—

Mac had gotten ahold of a prepay. It was sitting on her bed, and she was staring at it like a poisonous snake. She was waiting for a call from Peter. When it rang, she jumped about a foot off the bed before answering.

"Mackie." His voice set goosebumps on her skin.

"Hello Peter." she said, trying to suppress the disgust in her voice.

"How's the plan?" he asked right away. "Those biker brutes aren't treating you too badly?"

Mac bit her lip, holding back an insult in return and just sighed instead.

"It's coming, Peter." she said. "But the only way I'm getting outta here without injury to you or me is a trade. Jax needs Abel, and Chibs needs his family, and hopefully revenge. And I need you."

The words left a metallic taste on her tongue, but they worked their magic.

"Oh Mackenzie." he said. "I honestly couldn't care less about the kid, and Jimmy's insane. He needs to die."

 _You're both insane._

"I think we can make it happen. Give me a little to work out some details. I just want you back with me, unharmed Mackie. Jimmy's involved with the Russians, so we just gotta be careful." Peter said.

Mac goes a little cold. _The Russians?_

"Thank you Peter." she said, mind working quickly. "I'll see you soon, okay?"

She hears Peter's goodbye before hanging up the phone. The Russians might complicate the situation, but Peter, whatever had happened to Peter's mind, well, it was working in her favor. He certainly wasn't the same, but Mac wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth.

A commotion out the window told her Jax was back. He'd gone to find his son, though Abel wasn't with him. Mac went downstairs, curious. JAx was still outside, sitting on the picnic table with his head in his hands.

"Jackson." Mac said softly, using his full name to get his attention. "What happened?"

"I saw him, Mac." Jax said softly. "I saw him, with his happy new family, and I thought. I could never give him that. With me his life will never be normal. With them, he might be happy."

"Jax." Mac practically snarled. "He is your _son._ "

Jax looked up at the force in her voice. "He needs _you._ Not some strangers. He needs the love of his real mother and father. And I think you need him as well. SAMCRO is his family, Gemma, Clay, you, Tara. He needs his _family._ Don't give up love when you have it, Jax. It's a recipe for sadness."

The tone went out of her voice at the end, as she sat down next to him on the picnic table.

"I want it all, Mac." he said. "I want the happy family, the beautiful wife, the perfect son. And a successful club, keeping itself out of trouble."

"And you can have that!" Mac said. "You and Clay, I dunno, something seems better since Tig's fuck up. Same with you and Tara. You and Clay are putting the club on the right track. This is just an unfortunate sidebar. We're going to get Abel back, Jax. You know where he is, it's just a matter of getting him now. And you're going to be the greatest dad, Jax. You and Tara are going to raise that child in a home full of love and happiness and give him the life he deserves."

Jax was silent. "Thank you Mac." he said eventually. "I think you're right. Did you hear from Tara?"

Mac smiled. "Congrats, Daddy." she said. Tara had called the day before to check up and Mac and to tell her that she was pregnant. Clearly she'd told Jax too. He smiled at her.

"Thanks, Mac." he said. "I'm happy. And this new kid deserves an older brother." Mac grinned at him.

"How're you holding up?" Jax asked her. Mac sighed.

"I'm not angry anymore Jax." she said. "I was really pissed off, but honestly, after the first night here, it's just gone."

"What is it, then?" Jax asked. "You haven't been yourself since the docks."

"I'm tired, Jax." Mac said quietly. "I'm sad and tired and I don't know how to stop."

There was silence for a few minutes.

"We would've kill him, you know." Jax eventually said. "Me and the rest of the guys. Gemma. Donna. Tara. That day, I would've kill him for you."

Mac was startled to feel the tears in her eyes. "He doesn't deserve death." she said. "He deserves happiness. No one who's been through as much as he has deserves anything other than a little happiness. And now he's found it. He has his daughter and his wife and… I was under the impression that there was nothing between him and Fi anymore, but apparently I was wrong. He's back where he belongs. As long as he's happy… well…" She trailed off. She wasn't happy, but his happiness might make things just a little better.

"I won't say that it doesn't hurt, but Jax, I don't have a monopoly on pain, especially not after what you've been through. You'll get Abel back, one way or another, I have no doubts about that." Mac immediately knew there was too much certainty in her voice, but it was too late. Jax gave her a look.

"How?" he asked. Mac shook her head. "I just do." she said, and while Jax gave her another suspicious look, he eventually shrugged and turned back to watch the cars drive by.

"What a life this is." he eventually said, and Mac blinked away the tears from before. _It's our life and we must live it._

—

Jax eventually wandered back inside, walking towards Chibs when he saw the Scot sitting alone in a corner with an ashtray and something in his hands.

"Jackie boy." Chibs said when he noticed him, quickly flipping the photos over. "How are ya?"

"I've been better, man." Jax said, sitting down next to Chibs. "What ya got there?" he asked.

Chibs sighed. "Mac'd kill me if I showed ya."

Jax raised his brow. "I think she wants to kill you anyhow."

Chibs' lips twitched. "Right ya are." he said. "Mac did a little shoot with Luann before shit went down with the Irish. Gave me the photos."

"You're right." Jax said. "But I think Mac would've killed me too."

There was silence.

"You miss her, don't you?" Jax asked him, and Chibs sighed again.

"More than I thought possible." he said, and Jax could hear the relief in his voice to finally say that out loud. "I fucked it all up. Then she wouldn't speak to me, still won't. Now we're here and my girls need me."

"So does Mackenzie." Jax said, and Chibs knew it was true. "She needs you just as much as you need her. She's gotten past the anger, Chibby, and I think she's tired and sad and sick of being alone. She thinks you and Fi are back together. She thinks you've chosen your family over her, which you sort of have, but not in the way that she thinks. And she's not likely to listen to anyone else."

"I've lost her, Jackie boy." Chibs said. "It's too late."

"You're losing her." Jax corrected. "That doesn't mean you don't have a chance. She misses you, man."

And for the first time in a while, Chibs felt true hope bloom in his chest.

—

The clubhouse had erupted when Jax returned. According to Gemma, Ashby had come by and told the Sons that Jimmy knew where Abel was. Upon arriving, Jax had found the adopted family dead an Abel missing. The Sons were now preparing for war. God knew what Jimmy was going to do with the kid.

Well, God and Mac. She'd decided it was time to put her plan into action. There was no other choice. Jimmy and Peter were both on the spectrum of insane, and that kid wasn't going to have the happy life he deserved if Mac didn't correct her mistake. She'd called Peter and confirmed that she would trade herself for Abel. She'd laid it on as thick as she could, and it was a mark of how far Peter had gone that he didn't get suspicious at her enthusiasm.

And now they were on their way to the dock, ostensibly to catch Jimmy and Peter before they left with Abel. Mac knew they'd be waiting. The boys didn't, however, and were quietly surprised when they pulled up to the dock to find Jimmy and Peter waiting with Abel. There was a quiet standoff that reminded Mac vaguely of some western she'd watched once upon a time.

Then she stepped forward.

"Mac?" Jax asked questioningly, but she ignored him. She went to Jimmy, taking Abel from his arms and walking back to Jax.

"Love him always." she said, and it sounded like goodbye. She handed him two envelopes as well, once he had his son safely in his arms. Then she walked back to Jimmy and Peter, and stood quietly. She saw as realization washed over the Sons.

"No, Mackenzie, no!" Jax said, the tightening of his arms around his son betraying his words. The gratefulness that slipped into his eyes eased Mac's sadness briefly.

"It's what comes next, guys." she said, speaking to all of them, this wonderful group that had become her family. "It's my fault he was taken in the first place. Now I bring him back to you." There were tears on Jax's face.

"NO!" Now it was Chibs. Mac looked down quickly, knowing if she looked him in the eyes she would break.

"No, Mackenzie, please luv' don't do this! It's no' your fault, I'm a stupid bloody bastard for saying tha' in the firs' place! Please darlin' you can't leave me like this!" Mac caught Jax's eye, and he motioned to Clay and Bobby to grab Chibs before he ran at her. She caught Juice's eye, then Happy's and looked down again. It was too much.

Chibs' yelling made her want to cover her ears, and it was only amplified when Jimmy put a gun to her head.

"In the car, lass." he said, with a malevolent grin at Chibs. "Anotha girl of yours, Filip." he said. "I'm on a bit of a streak, no?" Chibs tried to launch at him, almost pulling Clay and Bobby over.

"Mackenzie! Mac! No, god, please don' get in tha' car, please, I need you alive!" Chibs kept yelling. Right before she slid in, Mac turned to look back at him.

"Go to your family, Filip." she said, looking him in the eye for the last time. Beautiful, sharp brown eyes. She missed those in the past weeks. "Bring them home, keep them and your brothers safe, and do your best to forget about me. You were right about Abel, but I was right in the first place. My past was always going to catch up with me. Stay safe." And Jimmy slammed the door behind her. Chibs fairly howled.

"Consider yerself luck you're leaving with your lives." Jimmy said as Peter climbed in the front passenger seat. Then Jimmy followed, and they were gone.

Chibs was crying. He could deny it all he wanted, but his brothers could see the tears shining on his face plain as day. How could he have let her get in that car? How could he not have seen the signs, seen that she was planning something? This clearly hadn't been out of the blue. How could he have accused her of such terrible things in the first place? The woman he loved, he'd hurt so badly she'd willingly given herself to the man that had hurt her in the past. And probably would again. Mac and the Sons knew she'd accepted her death as soon as she'd gotten in that car. There was small possibility that she'd come out of this alive.

 _Mackenzie._

He vaguely felt himself being helped away by Jax and Clay, noticing out of the corner of his eye the looks that each brother shared; of loss, of anger, of sadness, even of fear. She'd touched each and every one of them, and now it was his stupid actions that had ended with her back in Peter's hands.

 _Fuck_. Fuck fuck fuck fuck _fuck_.

"God _damn it._ " Jax swore. "I knew she was planning something but if I thought it was this I would've stopped it. I should've just shot 'em!"

"Jackie boy." Chibs said, voice thick. "Jackie, he'll kill 'er. Peter will kill her and Jimmy's a sick fuck who's got it out for me. We need to do something. I cannae let her die without at least trying."

Jax nodded, braining working quickly. He had the outline of a plan, but it was going to require trust from his brothers, keeping certain people in the dark, and Mac staying alive by herself. By the time they got back to the SAMBEL clubhouse, giving Abel to his crying grandmother, Jax was sure.

"I've got a plan, brother." he said to Chibs, and Jax saw his eyes spark in a way that hadn't since the day at the docks.

—

Mac was becoming a very good actor. She'd been trained to hide her feelings and reactions to certain situations, but she'd certainly had to think on her feet more often the longer she was around Peter. He'd definitely changed; he was the same person as when she'd left. He was less subtle with manipulations, he was a little more wild, and he was kind of… oblivious. She slipped up; she wasn't perfect, and when he touched her she did not react like someone interested. But he either didn't notice, or he was living in denial land.

It didn't matter. When the plane took off, she was still stuck with Peter and Jimmy, lucky to be alive.

—


	17. Chapter 16

**AN: Time is kind of choppy in this chapter. Bear with me. I'm sort of depending on you having watched the show through at least the end of Season 3. I'll be skipping over plot that concerns the guys and their plan, but just know that it follows basically the timeline as the season itself. Enjoy!**

 **—**

 _Dear Jax,_

 _Hopefully your reading this means you have Abel safely in your arms again. I cannot tell you how much seeing the look of relief on your face will help with my decision. First of all, I didn't make this decision lightly. It took some planning and relying on the fact that Peter isn't who he once was. It's like he's lost his mind, Jax, and once I realized that I decided to use it. I also know about your plan with Stahl; don't ask how, it isn't worth it. You should know that Jimmy is working with the Russians in California, so be careful what you get yourself involved with._

 _I'm going to try my hardest to get back to you guys. SAMCRO, for better or for worse, has become my family, and that includes Chibs. Make sure he's okay, Jax. I don't know how he's going to take this trade with Jimmy and Peter. I don't know how much he cares anymore. Keep your family close, Jax. Keep Tara and Gemma safe, and don't let your brothers get drawn into the darkness._

 _Mac_

 _Dear Filip,_

 _I wrote Jax a letter, explaining what will happen, and then thought I ought to write you one as well. But I don't know where to start. I don't know how much you care anymore. We had this spectacular connection. I'd never felt anything like it. For the first time, there wasn't a time constraint on a relationship; I didn't feel like it was necessary. I love you. I can't write that in the past tense, because I still do. But I want you to be happy. So, despite all that's happened between us and any lingering feelings you might have, I want you to walk away. Bring your family to Charming and be with who you really want. It hurt when I'd realized you made that decision at first, but I've come more to terms with it now._

 _Be happy, Chibs. Take care of your family. Don't worry about me._

 _Love, Mackenzie_

Church was tense.

Jax had read parts of his letter to the club, and they'd listened in tense silence. No one was more ready to explode than Chibs, but that wasn't exactly helping.

"We gotta save her, guys." Jax said, and there were nods around the table. Jax was trying to figure out how he could work Mac into his final plans with Jimmy. So far, there had been no easy solution.

"I have it that Jimmy is getting his hands on all the cash he can, Juice has the same thing about Peter. I think they're paying the Russians for something." Jax continued.

"They're tryn'a get outta the country." Chibs growled, always on edge since the return from Ireland. "Jimmy always had an escape plan, this is it."

There were more nods. It wasn't that the club didn't want to rescue her, it was that they weren't sure how. Yet.

—

They'd just finished dinner. Mac felt like she was in some kind of parallel universe. A universe where she was Peter and Jimmy's guest (see: prisoner), and they hadn't killed her yet. She'd honestly expected to be dead already, but the fact that she'd made it to the US spoke volumes about her safety in the future. Now, she was hearing about plans to get themselves new identities from the Russians, and escape to South America.

Not if she could help it.

It had not been a fun time, back with her ex. Peter, despite having lost some of the sharpness of his mind, was definitely still aware when a woman was interested. Mac, most definitely, was not. But she knew that now her life depended on her ability to pretend to still be in love with Peter, and so she did her absolute best. Despite losing Chibs, she had something to live for, for the first time in a while. SAMCRO was her family, and between them and her relationship with Tara, she had people to get back to.

That didn't mean it was easy. So far, she'd managed to keep Peter at bay physically, feigning an injury from the Sons, and he was far enough gone to believe her. He kissed her often, and Mac had quickly learned to hold back the revulsion she felt. More and more often she thought of Chibs, despite thinking they would never be together again, he kept her sane in the moments when Mac just wanted to gut her ex-boyfriend.

Then there was the spoken affection. She slipped into it as best she could. It helped that, while faking affection with Peter, she was thinking about fitting into Jax's plan, about escaping, about killing her captors. She needed to find a way to contact them. She hadn't been prepared for that possibility; there was just too high of a chance that Peter and Jimmy would kill her before she stepped foot in the US ever again. Now that she was here, and knew how to keep herself alive, her first order of business was to find a way to contact the Sons.

—

Chibs felt like crawling out of his skin. It was Mac, that much was obvious, but exactly what about her it was was alluding him. He'd left Fi and Kerrianne behind in Ireland. They didn't want to leave, and he wasn't about to uproot Kerrianne's life again. So long as Jimmy could be taken care of, they would be happy in Ireland. Chibs missed his daughter dearly, and would probably do so for the rest of his life, but he prized her happiness above his. And he and Fi weren't anything like they'd once been. Besides the kiss in Charming before Abel had been taken, there had been nothing romantic between them. Even then, Fi had kissed him. Chibs had Mac. She was it for him.

It was different then it had been when he thought Fi was it for him. It was more stable, and honestly a deeper relationship. He and Fi had had a lot of fire. Now, he and Mac had the fire, and something deeper on top of it. Chibs missed her terribly when she forcibly removed herself from his life. He knew he'd deserved it, but she'd made sure he hadn't had a chance to explain himself. He hadn't deserved one.

Now, after reading her letter, and finding out that they hadn't killed her right away, he needed to get her back. The club was behind him on this, despite their residual anger at the way he'd handled everything in the first place. He trusted Jax too. Jax had his plan, and had assured him that Mac had it figured out. His girl was smart. There was the worry in the back of his mind, that if they got her back, if she survived this, she still wouldn't hear him out.

He wasn't sure where her mind was. Judging by her letter, she obviously thought he was back with Fi, and no one had done anything to ease that worry. Of course, she hadn't really spoken to any of them but Jax, and he'd carefully avoided any mention of Chibs. When he thought back to how much pain he'd caused her, over misplaced anger, he still felt tremendously guilty. There was so much he wanted to apologize for, so much that he could see ahead of them if only he hadn't stuck his head up his ass.

Chibs was jolted from his reverie by Jax calling him to church. There was a plan in place, risky and easily failed, but a plan nonetheless. He'd get his girl back. Then he just had to hope he could convince her that he was worthy of a second chance.

—

Mac had just had a visit from the Russians, or rather, Mac, Peter, and Jimmy had just had their new identities delivered. Mac had gotten a little gift with her's, slipped surreptitiously to her by Putlova. He might be the only man Jimmy was really afraid of, and he certainly played on it. They were just finishing packing before heading out. Mac knew it was going to come down to this afternoon. This would be the first time she had been allowed outside the compound, and she and the Sons were planning to make the most of it. Putlova's package would certainly help with that.

It had come with a note as well: _You know what to do._

And Mac did. The time had come to put the plan in motion. She grinned to herself, throwing the last of her possessions in her bag, and walking out to meet Peter and Jimmy.

—

It was tense in the car. Peter kept trying to make small talk, and Mac would sometimes indulge him, trying to put off any sense that she wasn't completely on board with the escape plan. It was a tough position for her to be in; knowing the Sons plan but not knowing if each step had succeeded as planned. There would really be no way to know until…

The van turned down the side road. Mac made eye contact with Putlova as discreetly as she could. The next few minutes happened quickly. Jimmy had a short conversation with Putlova, clearly angry but resigned. The van was driving towards a group of pissed-off looking Sons, and there really was no way out for Jimmy and Peter, and supposedly Mac. Until she pulled out the gift from the Russians and pointed it at Peter's head.

She saw it in his eyes. He snapped. Mac cocked the gun, wanting to stop any reaction before it could happen. She saw Peter's hands tighten to fists with white knuckles, until Putlova did the same to Jimmy. The two were stuck between a rock and a hard place, and there was no escape. Mac cocked an eyebrow ironically, daring Peter to try something. For a second, the old Peter reappeared, eye flashing, with a brief, crooked, sardonic smile. Then they were parked, and Mac and the Russians helped the two men out of the car.

Mac kept careful watch as the trade went down, noticing a certain stiffness in the Sons when the Russians checked over the money. But before anything dramatic could happen, Jimmy and Peter were in the van, and Jax had wrapped Mac up in a hug.

"Jesus, Mac, don't ever do that again." he said thickly, and Mac just laughed.

"I'd do it again in a heartbeat." she said. "How's Abel?"

"Happy, thanks to you." Jax said, and Mac grinned. She greeted the rest of the guys, Clay and Juice included, all of them grinning and giving her a hug, happy to have her back. Mac reveled in the feeling of returning to family. It was like nothing she'd ever felt before. Jax and Clay herded them into the van quickly after the short reunion, and away they went.

The change over was quick as well. Mac helped the guys get Peter safely into Tara's car before giving Tara the biggest hug. She'd missed her friend.

"Thank god you're alright." Tara said, tears in her eyes.

"It's great to see you, Tara." Mac said. "But you understand what I had to do, right?"

Tara nodded. "Thank you for bringing by son back to me, Mackenzie."

Tara checked in with Jax, who'd put Peter safely in her trunk. Mac turned next to the other car, greeting Donna with the same enthusiasm. Jimmy was the man in her trunk now. Both women were willingly part of the Sons plan, and Mac was glad to see they agreed to do it. She was happy that their attentions towards the club hadn't changed in their time apart.

The Sons quickly sent Tara and Donna on their way, taking Mac with them in the van once they saw the Russians coming around the corner. Mac allowed herself to just be there, not an active part of the plan, trying to stay out of Stahl's gaze. Jax confirmed with Mac that Peter was now a part of Stahl's plan. There was nothing much for Mac to do until they got back to the clubhouse.

Then all thought stopped for a brief second, because there was Chibs, waiting for her as soon as she stepped out of the van.

—

 **AN: Sorry :) Also sorry about the short length. But the cliffhanger was too much to ignore.**

 **—**


	18. Chapter 17

_She's alive._ It was really the only thing Chibs could think for the first few moments after he'd seen Mac exit the van. He'd known that she'd made it to the states, but to see her alive and out of Jimmy and Peter's grasp was almost too much. He almost didn't believe it.

There was a frozen moment where they both just stood and stared at each other, until Chibs was overcome with the need to make sure she was really there, and walked towards her, wrapping her in a hug. Mac returned it, albeit hesitantly.

"Thank god yer alive." Chibs whispered harshly.

"You got my letter?" Mac asked.

"Aye." Chibs said, pulling back and meeting her eye, but leaving his hands on her shoulders.

"I expected to die." she said. "But Peter wasn't the old Peter. I managed to trick him. Still, I'm glad to be rid of Jimmy." Chibs face went dark.

"Aye, I am as well." he said. He notices that most of the rest of SAMCRO has made themselves scarce, unsure of what is to come.

"Look, Mackenzie." he began. "I made a real arse of myself. I wasn't there when ya needed me most, I blamed ya for terrible shit that ya couldn't possibly be guilty of, I let my trust for ya collapse completely under the threat of da Irish, and I canna possibly apologize enough. But I want ya ta know, Fi kissed me, that time in Charming. She kissed me, and there was nothing after tha'. I wasn't lying when I told ya, she will always be the mother of my child, but I'm no' in love with her anymore. I'm in love with you. I was devastated when you left with Jimmy and Peter; I'd never gotten the chance to apologize, to tell you the truth, ta even speak with ya after our fight. I thought I'd lost tha' chance forever. Thank god yer here. Please, Mackenzie, I'm sorry."

He winced when his voice broke on the last word. Showing weakness wasn't his forte, and the blank look on Mac's face wasn't helping. There was a light buzzing in her ears; her brain trying to comprehend everything Chibs had just said. He hadn't cheated on her, hadn't gone back to his wife, hadn't gone back on his words. He loved her. He _loved_ her. And his apology had been heartfelt. He could've blown her off, but he hadn't. And when she looked in his eyes, she saw the same pain that she had felt. Something inside her went warm and seemed to click. She leaned forward before she even knew she was doing it.

There was fire between there lips, or at least that's what it felt like. Chibs had missed this so much. It was a simple kiss for all of five seconds, before Chibs came his senses and flipped them around, pressing Mac's back against the van and grabbing her face, deepening the kiss. Mac drank him in, trying to make up for weeks of pain and misery and near-death experiences. She responded beautifully, matching him step for step and burying her hands in his hair. God, had she missed this. The smell of him; leather and bike and whatever soap he used; the feel of his scars and stubble under her thumbs, and the absolute flood of heat that went through her as he pushed her against the van.

Chibs was feeling it too; his arousal pressed up tight against her hip, clearly uncaring of the fact that they were in the middle of the TM parking lot. His lips left hers, moving across her cheek to nip on her earlobe before trailing down her neck to her collarbone. He found a sensitive spot, making Mac gasp and throw her head back as he proceeded to leave a mark. It was really the only reason she saw Jax, smiling with a quirked eyebrow. Mac knew their job wasn't done, and no matter how desperately she wanted to continue where she and Chibs were going, there were two men waiting for death. So when Chibs came up for air, grinning at the mark on her collarbone, she pushed him away lightly.

"Filip, god, stop, we have something else to finish first." she said, gasping for breath. He grinned at her, but understood that she was right. He stepped back slightly.

"Alright, luv, but this is far from over." he said, accent thick as hell, voice low. Mac shivered, wishing to hell that they didn't have other pressing concerns. She straightened her clothes as the rest of the Sons came outside. Mac said hello to Happy and Tig, who were both glad to see her alive.

Then it was Jimmy's turn. Jax pulled him around the back of the clubhouse, and Chibs and Mac followed. The rest of the Sons kept watch. Jax pressed Jimmy against the brick wall of the clubhouse, keeping him there with a pointed gun. Chibs approached him, Mac at his side, glaring hatred on his face. This was it for Chibs. Mac could see the years of pain resting on his shoulders as he drew two wicked looking knives from his cut.

"Take care of our girls, yeah Filip?" Jimmy asked, and Chibs' lip curled.

"Oh yeah." he said, and Mac heard the promise in those words.

He swung the knives simultaneously, and two bright red stripes appeared on Peter's face, giving him the same Glasgow smile as Chibs wore. Chibs gave him just a few seconds to appreciate the pain before driving the same knives into his chest, killing him.

Chibs stood stock still for a few seconds, then bent to wipe the knives on Jimmy's shirt before re-sheathing them. Mac watched Jax motion for someone outside. Happy came running over, tarp in hand. Chibs spat once on Jimmy's body before stepping back, watching with sharp eyes as Happy wrapped the body in a tarp and took it away. Mac wasn't sure what they would do with it, but if Happy was in charge, they'd likely never hear of it again. This thought was drive from her mind, however, as Chibs pressed her against the wall, and kissed the living daylights out of her.

Mac heard Jax chuckle before following Happy away. There was a fire in their blood, and Mac didn't stop Chibs as he kissed down her neck, pulling her shirt and bra aside to get at her tits. She gasped as he tongued and then bit lightly at her nipples, sending ripples of heat through her. One hand joined his mouth, the other slipped open the button on her jeans and slipped into her panties, feeling how ready she was for him.

" _Jesus Mackenzie._ " he groaned, and Mac just moaned as he found her clit.

"I want…" she said, panting, "oh god, please, I want you inside me." Chibs growled, but followed orders. Mac's hands clumsily helped him undo his belt and pull down his jeans, both hampered as they kissed each other. Then his jeans were gone and he'd pulled her's down enough for their activities.

"Now." Mac said, her voice rough, and Chibs' eyes darkened even farther, if that was possible. He picked her up under her ass, encouraging her to wrap her legs around his waist, and impaled her. Mac cried out, and Chibs swore fluently.

"Oh _god,_ Filip, I love you." she said, and now it was Chibs' turn to moan.

"I love you too, Mackenzie, and I won't ever stop." he said, voice broken, using the wall to support part of her weight as he fucked her hard. They were desperate for each other, and with each thrust Mac moaned his name or a curse or _faster._ They both hurtled towards the edge, having gone entirely too long without each other. Mac scrabbled at his neck with her nails, leaving marks that made Chibs hiss and pound into her harder.

Quickly, too quickly, Chibs was there.

"Come with me, luv." he said, pressing against her clit, and he kissed her to swallow her screams, mindful of their semi-private position. He came so hard his knees almost gave out and his vision flickered as Mac shook around him, kissing him for all she was worth. Eventually they separated for breath, standing there, him still inside her, foreheads pressed together, unwilling to move.

"I really do love you." Chibs said eventually. "In love with you." he corrected, musing over the words. Mac gave him a smile so sweet he wondered if it was possible to melt, and then scolded himself for thinking like that. She brought it out in him. He had to wonder, sometimes, how she could be so open with him, despite all the horrors she'd seen in her life, and how cold she could be with others. He wasn't about to complain, however.

Eventually he let her down, and they helped each other get dressed again, slowly working their way back out to the parking lot, kissing every now and then. They both knew that this day would most likely end with Chibs in jail for whatever time Jax had negotiated. Hopefully not too long. But they were going to make the most of the time they had. They found the parking lot empty, until Stahl came flying in and the Sons came out of the clubhouse, looking defensive.

"Where are they?" Stahl asked Jax, incensed.

"Not sure what you're on about?" Jax said.

"Why are they here?" Clay asked Jax, feigning confusion. Mac stood back and turned to Tara.

"Make sure you say goodbye to Jax." she said, simply shaking her head at the confused look on Tara's face.

Mac watched carefully as Jax walked up to Stahl, having a short conversation. This was the tricky part. Their deal involved both Jimmy and Peter, alive, but Jimmy was already dead and gone. This part of the plan relied on Stahl accepting just Jimmy.

And it worked.

"Fine." she said angrily. "But if you don't go get him, I'll have my agents here tear your clubhouse apart."

Jax turned to Clay, having a short conversation. Clay broke out in anger, and Mac rather thought he was a pretty good actor.

"Go get Peter." Clay eventually said angrily, motioning to Tig and Juice. They do as they're told, if in some confusion, and Peter comes out with a smile on his face.

"Gotta love the American Justice system." he said, a smug grin on his face. He turned to Mac. "And you, you lying whore, we're not done." He clearly thought his life wasn't going to end today. Mac just smiled at him, trying to look at least a little fearful.

"Just the luck o' the Irish, I guess." Peter said, before being hauled into the car by the ATF agents. The guys are all doing a pretty good job of looking angry, but Mac knows the confusion on Donna, Tara, and Gemma's faces is real.

"How did you know he was here?" Clay asked. Stahl got a devious look on her face that made Mac's stomach jump in nervousness. Here is was.

"Jax here gave me a tip." she said.

Jax jumped at her, and but for the Sons restraining him, would've made it. The rest of the brothers look askance, unable to believe that Jax ratted on them.

"I didn't have a choice, brothers." Jax said lowly. They yell convincingly, and Mac could tell Stahl was convinced.

"You just signed my death warrant." Jax snarled at her. Stahl just smiles.

"I had to make sure you were pinned as a rat. There's no trust here." she said, and Gemma turned on her angrily. Stahl just continued to smile.

"He was pushed into it, Clay." Gemma said, now turning to Clay with tears in her eyes, clearly believing that Jax really had turned rat. In the brief commotion that follows, Mac makes sure Tara gets in to say goodbye to Jax. She goes to Chibs and surreptitiously grabs his hand one last time and gives it a squeeze. It would be the last time they would see each other until the guys were released from jail.

After saying her wordless goodbye, Mac slowly backed away from the group, who were currently being put in handcuffs. She stood with Kosik and Opie and Donna, who Opie had just filled in. They were sure to keep up the act until Jax, Clay, Chibs, Tig, Happy, Juice, and Bobby had all been loaded into the van and were safely away with Stahl.

Mac, Kosik, and Opie quickly walked out of the parking lot, leaving Donna behind with the prospects. They walked around the corner, looking for the yellow school bus. The door opened for them when they found it, and there was Piney, behind the wheel. Mac grinned at him, and he gave her a little salute.

They drove until they saw Unser's car, parked next to the ATF car, and Mac felt a little jump in her stomach. Peter's time had come. Peter was still in the car, while Stahl was standing outside it. Both were at Unser's gunpoint. Mac made sure she had her knives before getting off the bus. Kiosk retrieved Peter from the car for her, bringing him to the side of the bus. Before he had a chance to say anything, Mac took one knife and stabbed him in the stomach.

It wasn't a wound that would kill him, but it would cause him considerable pain, and that had been Mac's intention.

"Hello Peter." she said, allowing all the hatred she felt to seep into her voice.

"Mackie." he replied. "This is it, yeah?" Mac simply nodded.

"You had to know this was coming." she said. "I expected you to come for me when I stopped in Charming. And it worked. You lost yourself for a little while, while we were in Ireland, but it's good to see the old Peter back."

He shook his head. "It was partially Jimmy's fault. Spend too much time around that man and you'll go slightly insane as well." he said.

"You almost ruined me, Peter." Mac said. "You tricked me, used me, and almost took my life several times. I'm going to kill you, mark my words, but it isn't just for me anymore. It's for that woman and her child, _your_ child, who's lives you made me take. It's for every other woman you've hurt, for everyone who's died at your hands pointlessly. I want you to feel the pain you've caused everyone else in your life."

"You were weak." Peter spat at her, anger appearing in his eyes. "You still are. Going back to him, that was weak." And Mac knew he was talking about Chibs.

She shook her head. "It was the opposite of weak." she said. "You don't know love, can't understand meaningful relationships, and that's fine. But I can. What Filip and I had is a million times stronger and you and I. Which is why you're the one under my knife and he's the one in my bed."

Peter snarled.

"No regrets Peter. Your time has come." she said, and allowed herself to see the fear in his eyes before slicing his neck open. He died quickly.

Mac felt a weight come off her back that she hadn't known had been there. Peter was dead. Her past was gone. She could be completely present. Finally.

The two gunshots roused her from her frozen state. Opie had killed Stahl. _Good._ The bitch had deserved it; almost causing Donna's death. He steps out of the car, ripping up one of the blue folders, the other one signed and safely in Lowen's hands, ensuring the guys shortened jail sentences.

She, Kosik, Opie, and Piney looked at each other and grinned. They'd succeeded. Unser took his punch like a man, after an apology from Mac, and the rest of time climbed in the bus. Mac took a second to draw the IRA cross on the windshield of Stahl's car. Best this be deflected a little from the Sons.

And then they were gone. Opie took a second to text the prospects, letting them know all had gone down as planned. Mac could almost hear the laughter in the guys' van, once the prospects had let them know the plan had worked.

—

The mood in the van was tense. Most of the guys had their gazes fixed on the ground. Chibs' mind was on Mac, hoping that she was okay and that Peter was dead. Killing Jimmy had lifted something from his back, and he hoped the same for Mac.

And then they heard the honking. It was the prospects, outside the van, confirming that the plan had worked. They broke out in laughter. God, it was good that something had gone right. Chibs laughed along with his brothers, feeling good despite the looming jail sentence.

"This club…" Jax spoke seriously, and his brothers quieted around him. "This club is about brotherhood and love. Or at least it started that way. We know that, in the past year, we've gotten more and more greedy and fearful and it's undermined the love and brotherhood that we work towards. It's gotten us in more trouble than it's been worth."

His brothers were nodding.

"We're going back to basics." Clay picked up the thread. "Getting out of guns, away from the Russians, sticking with porn and gambling and smuggling stuff that's not going to get us put away for life. Protecting those who will pay for it. We're going back to family, to brotherhood, to honor. We've faced enough bad shit to last us a lifetime. We'll get the cops out of Charming and bring peace back to our lovely little town, and our beautiful families."

There were nods and exclamations of agreement. The guys were in it.

"Kosik, Piney, and Opie are all agreed as well." Clay said. "Nothing like what almost happened to Donna will ever happen again. Same goes for Mackenzie and Tara." He nodded to Jax and Chibs, recognizing how close Tara came to death while the Sons had been in Ireland.

"This is how the club started. We're not running from the past anymore. We're trying to emulate it." Jax pounded his fist into his other hand as best he could while chained to the seat. His brothers nodded.

And so it was.

—

Mac clinked her beer bottle against those of Gemma, Tara, Luann, Chucky, Opie, Piney, and Kosik. Everything had gone to plan. The guys not locked up had started the process of ending the Sons relationships with gun running. They weren't necessarily looking forward to the next thirteen months, but it was better than living in fear. Mac saw the same sorrow reflected in Tara, Gemma, and Luann's eyes, knowing that it would be a long thirteen months. But they'd conquered their pasts, and in doing so, had ensured their futures.

—

 **AN: So, we've successfully completed the plan. I'm going off script now. I might reference some things that happen in the actual TV show, but I think the end of this chapter makes it pretty obvious that we're deviating from the tragedy of the show. Don't worry, we're going to almost completely skip over the guys' time in jail. I hope you enjoy the angst while it lasted, because it's going to be pretty fun from here on out. That being said, there's no more driving plot, so chapters might come slower. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed the journey so far. :)**

 **—**


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